Dear Matisse,
What’s with these so-called escorts running around practically
giving their stuff away? They ruin it for those of us who respect
ourselves enough to charge a reasonable price. Do you have any ideas
about how to make these girls get in line with the rest of us and stop
undercutting other ladies?
Yeah, I have an idea: mind your own business. I’ve heard women
complaining about this in every arena of sex work for my entire career.
I’m sure other service-based workers do it too, but sex workers doing
so really annoys me, especially when they use some
moral/psychological lever like self-respect. I doubt that, say,
plumbers attempt to control the business activities of other plumbers
by implying that they’re skanky whores if they don’t charge the same
fee for clearing out someone’s pipes. Making money is a happy thing,
but the idea that respecting yourself as a sex worker only comes at a
certain price point is absurd. Plus, I’m always suspicious of a
woman who rants too much about this. One suspects she’s trying to
get other women to raise their prices so she can then undersell
them.
The economic systems of autonomous sex workers and their clientele
is free market in its purest form. It is, essentially, a precapitalist
form of business. Marx would call it simple commodity
production, which means that the producers own the
resources—in this case, their sexual attractiveness and their
skills and labor—that they then trade for what they want. In such
a system, the invisible hand of the marketplace tends to take care of
any lack of equilibrium.
Price fixing usually ends up stifling the economic growth it’s
supposed to protect. It’s also illegal—although it’s hard to
imagine a bunch of sex workers being charged with violating antitrust
law. But economic theory aside, I’ve worked in systems of sex work in
which prices were (supposedly) regulated by management, and I’ve seen
people try to use peer pressure to do so. It’s bad for morale, and it’s
also damn near impossible. You don’t really know what another sex
worker is getting paid unless you’re with her when the cash is counted
out. In casual conversation, competitive sex workers round up their
incomes as readily as they inflate their bust measurements. You can’t
go by ads, either—avaricious ladies sometimes quote a low price
up front and then up sell the client upon arrival. And crooked clients
will try to score bargains by lying about how much they paid another woman.
I believe in being pleasant and courteous to one’s sex-work peers,
and I don’t view all other sex workers—even other pro
dommes—as being my direct competitors, because most women are
very different from me in what they have to offer. And if I did think of someone as my competitor, then why would I give her any
say in how I run my shop? I have been successful by staying focused
on my own bottom line, not other women’s. As one businesswoman to
another, I recommend you do the same. 
FRIDAY
10/19
MEN-ONLY NIGHT: UNIFORMS
A BDSM play party for gay, bi, and straight boys. Wet Spot, 1602
15th Ave W, Building E, 270-9746, men-only@wetspot.org, 10 pm—3
am, $20/$15 if you’re in uniform, male ID required, members and their
guests only.
EROS EVENT SWING PARTY
Party at the friendly Eastside swing club—tonight’s theme is
Rocky Horror. Single men must request to be added to the
waiting list; couples and single women can just show up. Eros
Events, 425-868-8169, www.eros-events.org, 7 pm, new people
must arrive by 6 pm, $50 for couples/$30 for single women.
SATURDAY 10/20
THE EVERETT FALL HOME SHOW
The third annual Everett Fall Home Show is here, with over 350
booths of home-improvement products and services, plus professionals
who can answer any and all questions about decorating, winterizing, and
installing Balinese fuck-swings. Plus: free pumpkins for the kids!
Everett Events Center, 2000 Hewitt Ave, Everett, 425-322-2600,
www.comcastarenaeverett.com,
10 am—6 pm, $6.50/$7.
VERONICA MONET: THE STRAIGHT MAN’S GUIDE TO GETTING LAID
What are the secrets of seduction and how can you feel more
confident in the dating world? Veronica is a certified sex educator and
the author of Sex Secrets of Escorts: Tips from a Pro. Learn
more at www.veronicamonet.com. Wet
Spot, 1602 15th Ave W, Building E, 270-9746, director@sexpositiveculture.org, 2—5 pm, $65, male ID required.
LITTLE RED STUDIO: THE BLACK SHOW
A new show about the darker side of Eros. No-host wine bar.
Little Red Studio, 750 Harrison St, 328-4758, www.littleredstudioseattle.com,
9 pm, $30, reservations recommended
.TUESDAY 10/23
POLYAMORY LIFESTYLE DISCUSSION
No matter what kind of polyamory you practice, we all have issues to
discuss. How do we all schedule? How do we share? What is compersion?
How do we overcome jealousy? This is your chance to see how others do
it. Wet Spot, 1602 15th Ave W, Building E, 270-9746, poly@sexpositiveculture.org,
7:30—9:30 pm, $1 donation.
TUESDAY 10/30
KINKY SEATTLE INFO NIGHT
Want to meet kinky people and find local fetish events, but don’t
know where to start? Allena Gabosch, executive director of the Center
for Sex Positive Culture, will cover places to go, events to keep an
eye out for, what to wear, and proper etiquette. Babeland, 707 E
Pike St, 328-2914, 7:30 pm, free.