Thefrisky.com—a site devoted to female troubles and powered by raw estrogen—recently polled their audience and found that 48.6 percent of women would drink while pregnant. The poll didn’t mention whether these pregnant women would drink in public or not—just that more women are open to the idea of drinking while pregnant.
I have never been pregnant, but if you’ve got a built-in drinking buddy, it sounds pretty rad. But here’s the thing: all the pregnant ladies I know say that if you’re pregnant and you drink in public, you get nervous, pitying looks from people—as if you are actively killing your fetus’s one brain cell.
“The only way to enjoy yourself is to drink alone, in the bathroom, like your alcoholic uncle does,” one pregnant friend told me. Now I’m feeling confused and judgmental. Maybe my friends are hysterical and paranoid that society is judging them. Maybe society is judging them. Maybe my friends are pregnant alcoholics.
Help me out. Is it now socially acceptable for pregnant ladies to drink?
regardless of what we want to think, @20 is correct.
By the time you know you’re pregnant, if you’re a heavy drinker, it’s probably pretty late to reduce the risk factors that much.
Binge drinking is always pretty much bad for you, of course.
I think the problem is that we’re acting like everyone is Tim Eyman, wanting to make it legal to blow through red lights and endanger everyone, when most people don’t blow through red lights and try to endanger others.
@53, “There is even little evidence that occasional binge drinking during pregnancy seriously harms the fetus, according to an analysis of medical research published during the 35 year period between 1970 and 2005 involving over 3,500 articles. Binge drinking was defined as consuming five or more alcoholic drinks per occasion.
There was little evidence that binge drinking caused miscarriage, stillbirths, abnormal birthweight, or birth defects such as fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS).”
I think steady but heavy drinking is worse than occasional binge drinking.
My Mom partied like a rock star with me on-board and it didn’t seem to harm…
…butterfly!
Wait- who has just one drink..? Is it even possible to feel any sort of intoxication off one drink?
I know I feel absolutely nothing after one drink- so why even bother?
I suggest that the pregnant woman discusses it with her Ob/Gyn. Get the facts from a medical professional that actually knows something about this topic over what someone idiot might post on a blog.
Ummm, because 57, not all of us drink for intoxication. In most countries beer and wine are what you have with lunch and dinner. Period.
The scientific literature on fetal alcohol syndrome fails to reveal a significant (i.e., detectable) incidence until the moms studied are ADMITTING to the equivalent of four drinks daily. Given the chronic underreporting of alcohol intake by women in most studies, you probably don’t see FAS until there is significant drinking—much more than an occasional glass of wine.
The party line in the US medical community is : “We don’t know what level of drinking is safe, so best not to drink at all.” Bullshit! I didn’t buy that crap in med school, or residency, or during my pregnancies, and I don’t buy it now.
(…and don’t even get me started on the fact that in earlier eras we treated certain medical conditions in pregnancy with alcohol: premature labor, hyperemesis, etc. The current party line is the current fashion. That’s all.)
@60 Seriously? That’s all you can come up with? If your only reason for drinking is to fit in with the crowd, do yourself and your baby a favor and don’t get pregnant in the first place- the last thing this world needs is more mindless sheep.
@25- It’s more like 40 weeks, which is closer to 4/5s of a year. Why does everyone run with this “9 months” number?
And to everyone with their panties in a wad: unwad them. There’s no evidence moderate drinking causes FAS.
@61- I like how you call someone a “mindless sheep” while ignoring a shitload of science.
Uhhh 61, I’m not much of a drinker. I like wine with dinner sometimes and an occasional beer. If you’re talking about drinking to fit in with the crowd, that wouldn’t be me, not by a long shot.
But in most of the world, wine and beer are table beverages, and have been for ages.
I was actually touching on the party line because as a practicing obstetrician, I’m supposed to parrot it. But I don’t because the science is lacking. Instead I tell my patients what the evidence shows and doesn’t show and I trust them to make good judgements. Most adults really do want to do the right thing and be good parents. Not all people drink to get high. Some like the taste and some like the appetite stimulation. For my own part, a few slugs of beer were all that controlled my vomiting with my first pregnancy (don’t ask me why—something about the hops and the urps and the salt and the carbs I guess). All in all I maybe had a whole six pack in the first 14 weeks. Hardly enough to give me a buzz, particularly because it was light beer….). That kept me from throwing up literally 18 times a day and got some calories in, so I can’t think it was much worse than the other sedatives we hand out for that condition.
Pretty much every woman who’s been pregnant in the last few years and dared to have a sip of alcohol in public has a story about some self-righteous do-gooder who gave her a public lecture about how her baby was going to be born with FAS and probably end up raping and killing kindergarten teachers.
I’m on a mailing list with a large and diverse group of women. This subject has come up several times. There are several absolutist FAS crusaders on the list, all of whom have no problem getting right up in the face of someone they do not know in public because they appear to be pregnant and they appear to be imbibing alcohol. They all insist that even one sip of alcohol at any time during gestation can cause FAS, which is horseshit.
I know at least one woman who has a prominent tummy (she is not pregnant, nor particularly fat, she just has a pot belly), and she’s been harassed numerous times by the Nanny Brigade for having a glass of wine or a beer.
My mother, like many mothers of her era, coped with pregnancy and its hassles by drinking and smoking to great excess. Not falling-down-drunk drinking, but definitely a few cocktails nearly every night. That used to be pretty damned common. She had six healthy, full-term babies. I’m not saying that makes her some kind of anti-FAS role model – I’ve definitely encountered some kids with FAS in my time – I’m just saying there has to be some happy midpoint between the prohibitionists and the old days. Starting off with MYOFB unless it’s either your body or you were the sperm donor is a damned good beginning.
Monique is 110% correct.
assholes.
yeah, we know, the truth cuts like a razor…..
once, in an anatomy class, we were talking about FAS and one girl said matter-of-factly: “yeah, i drank through one of my pregnancies and that baby died.”
jaw dropper.
one huge problem is that FAS has a huge spectrum and is difficult to diagnose. you might not ever realize the effects.
countries like Germany and Italy that have that causal drinking culture see huge FAS problems.
sad to see us go backwards on this.
@31: “Alcohol is a solvent.”
I know what you intended to say based on your follow-up posts, but in future you should be more specific. FYI, Water is also a solvent. I presume you agree that drinking water is not bad for pregnant women. The quoted statement puts you at risk for being called out by anyone who knows even a tiny bit about chemistry.
@ everyone else:
I don’t care about others’ behavior as long as they’re not binge drinking. (And even then, I wouldn’t have the temerity to confront them about it. Unless they’re a close friend or family member, it’s none of my business.) My (European) husband feels that a few drinks a week is fine. I incline more towards abstinence, despite the lack of scientific evidence that one drink a week would harm the baby. Like a poster above said, it’s easier to say “none” than make an established study of what “moderation” means.
Has anyone actually read the alcohol warning signs in bars/liquor stores? In my state it says, “Drinking alcohol while pregnant or prior to conception may cause birth defects.”
PRIOR TO CONCEPTION?! So I had one beer on my 21st birthday, and that could fuck up the baby I have at 35? Obviously bullshit. But CYA extremism is easier than proving something one way or the other. Scientific research is an ongoing pursuit of the asymptote of fact. You can get closer and closer to the truth, but it takes a lot of resources, and not all experiments are perfectly executed.
That said, I’ll change gears in response to comments above:
If women track their cycles, it’s tough to do much damage before they know they’re pregnant. Implantation (beginning of the embryo stage) doesn’t happen until 1-2 weeks (roughly) after conception. That’s when the embryo starts sharing the mother’s blood supply. Brain development does begin early, but in my opinion (based on an understanding of science and the journal articles I’ve read) a bender between ovulation and a missed period is highly unlikely to cause a severe mental disability.
In summary: I don’t plan to drink if I become pregnant, but I do not think that a glass of wine a week is an irresponsible decision. Hell, I don’t think a glass of wine a DAY is an irresponsible decision… especially if it is consumed slowly enough for the liver to metabolize the alcohol before it can build up (i.e. nurse it for more than an hour). But if and when I become pregnant, and IF I decide to drink in moderation, I will certainly never do so in public. It’s not worth the grief.
Sorry for being so long-winded. I’m late to the party (as usual… damn EST)
I couldn’t vote. I would’ve picked: “It might not be socially acceptable, but a drink here and there in public or private isn’t go to hurt the fetus’s one brain cell.” Or, according to the study that @19 mentions, one to two per week! Whoo hoo! I’m getting pregnant!
I think there’s a huge problem with the world policing the behavior of women we presume to be pregnant.
#1 – Are you sure she’s pregnant? Maybe that belly is a metabolic disorder or a big tumor, benign or cancerous. Maybe she’s just fat. Can you tell? I can’t, and I deliver babies for a living. Unless it’s you, yourself, or you’re the FOB, STFU.
#2 – How the hell do you know what’s in that glass? Do you know if that’s an O’Doul’s or a cranberry juice or pear juice, or a ginger ale? You don’t, so STFU.
#3 – What the hell do you know about her world, her situation, her problems? Maybe her doc has given her guidelines and she follows them. Who are you to overrule her medical team? STFU.
#4 – This is in no way analogous (as one poster suggests above) to intervening with someone who’s smacking a child around. Don’t even go there. That’s like saying we should invade Iraq because Saddam might have WMDs (and we all know how that turned out). STFU!!
#5 – I have been taking care of pregnant women for decades and I have yet to meet one who isn’t trying her damnedest to be a good mom. I include in that statement meth-heads and alcoholics. These folks are really trying, and even if they are failing YOU ARE NOT HELPING BY REGISTERING YOUR DISAPPROVAL. Do you really think your symbolic statement is making ANY difference in her situation? You’re right: it isn’t. If you want babies to be healthier, there are lots of things you CAN do, like supporting universal healthcare for moms and babes, pushing Congress to expand WIC, and demanding that drug and alcohol rehab centers take mothers WITH their children. These things make a difference.
But confronting a woman you think is pregnant with what you think is alcohol in her hand?
Oh please STFU.
My wife and I did quite a bit of reading on dietary and drinking during both pregnancies (we are both vegetarians so were a little more wigged about dietary things). Based on that reading, we concluded that a little drinking every now and then was ok.
And based on the existence of people like Original Monique & Reverse Polarity we adopted a strategy for whenever someone gave my wife the stink eye when she had a beer. I would finish most of my beer quickly and then switch glasses with her throughout the evening. We would then have her order another beer. And another. And another. And another. She would wind up drinking 1-1 1/2 beers max, but continually be ordering.
Pure comedy gold watching people try to contain their disapproval.
@71
Hero, my: you are.
Quite likely no one is reading this anymore, but my wife is pregnant with our second child and is having occasional drinks. This is based on the following advice from our pediatrician:
1. No American doctor would ever say it is OK to drink during pregnancy.
2. There is no established minimal level of drinking that has been established as safe.
3. Studies to rigorously determine a safe drinking level during pregnancy would be unethical.
4. In France, the advice to pregnant women is to have no more than two glasses of wine a day.
5. In France, the level of FAS is lower than the US.
6. You are now fully informed.
My wife would probably have a couple of drinks a week, but I’m more cautious (and paranoid that if something goes wrong for any reason that it will be too easy to blame the drinking). Because I’m the only other person whose opinion counts, she won’t drink if it makes me uncomfortable.
Drinking early on in pregnancy is most likely to cause defects. Some studies (this is not well researched) suggest that an occasional glass of wine is ok. This is something that gives me pause as a bartender – what do I do when a pregnant woman comes up to me and orders a drink? And God help me if I say “I don’t want to serve a pregnant woman” and she’s not pregnant.
Look, if you can’t handle your life without alcohol for 9 months, you’ve got a problem. That includes “pregnancy-related stress”. You wanna know what’s stressful? Raising a disabled child.
The “societal pressure” I got when I was pregnant was everybody saying to me “how are you doing NOT DRINKING? Isn’t NOT DRINKING really hard? I don’t think I could handle NOT DRINKING for 9 months.”
What the fuck is wrong with our society that the mere idea of being unimpaired is so frightening?
OK, I’m still steamed up about this.
All y’all who are drinking to deal with “pregnancy-related stress”? Hey, guess what? Being a parent is infinitely more stressful. Now would be a great time to find some way of coping with stress other than alcohol.
I know (from experience, thank you) that there are lots of things that pregnant women are/are not supposed to eat and drink, and it’s a hassle, and you get some unsolicited advice. (I never got much advice, truth be told, but I got some, it’s annoying, fine.) For example, you’re not supposed to eat unpasteurized soft cheeses. This is because there is a risk that they may carry a certain bacteria that can cause birth defects. Some people eat unpasteurized Brie anyway. THIS IS NOT THE SAME AS DRINK AND DRUGS.
See, if you eat the Brie and it doesn’t have the bacteria– and it probably won’t; although some contaminated cheese did show up at a local grocery store and at the farmer’s market in my neighborhood this year, as it happens– if you eat the cheese and it DOESN’T have the bacteria, NO HARM DONE. Alcohol is different. If you drink, there is SOME harm. “Having” FAS means having it severely enough that your parents can’t ignore the problem. Not “having” FAS doesn’t necessarily mean that you were not affected by alcohol exposure in utero.
Furthermore– and I think the science is entirely in agreement on this point– kids are definitely adversely affected by having parents who use alcohol to deal with stress. (I also know this from experience.)
C’mon, seriously? There are plenty of tasty non-alcoholic beverages out there, and you are, in fact, allowed to enter a bar even if you’re not drinking alcohol.
Well, rca, the amazing thing about humans is that we all process our ideas about risk differently.
For my part, I’m quite the opposite of you. The bug in the cheese you reference (Listeria) is deadly. If you contract the infection from contaminated cheese or deli meat (and you won’t know it was tainted until later) your fetus will die. End of story. So my opinion is that that risk is unacceptable.
The risk of an occasional beer or glass of wine is much much lower. In fact that risk is purely theoretical, since the science isn’t there to support that it’s risky at all.
On the other hand I should say that I don’t drink to deal with stress either, so I’m in agreement with you that alcohol is not a good way to de-stress…. Having said that, I would point out that sometimes people who aren’t as enlightened and well-adjusted and centered as you do find themselves to be pregnant…..
@76: You are simply moralizing. Your opinion is not based in fact.
“no study has been able to correlate moderate drinking to birth defects. The studies used to promote abstinence from drinking are based on results from heavy drinkers.”
“A study in 2006 by the British Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology concluded that there was no convincing evidence of adverse effects of prenatal alcohol exposure at low to moderate levels.”
Dr Eric Jauniaux, professor of obstetrics and fetal medicine at the Royal Free hospital in London: “Alcohol is mainly metabolised by the liver, and only what’s left will be met by the placenta. The amount that could reach the foetus in a glass of beer or a glass of wine is negligible.“
“If a patient tells me that she’s drinking two or three glasses of wine a week, I am personally comfortable with that after the first trimester,” said Dr. Austin Chen, an obstetrician in TriBeCa.
“As far as we know, drinking lightly during pregnancy does not have adverse consequences. The systematic studies and meta-analyses we looked at suggest that drinking fewer than three small drinks per week is a safe level of consumption for pregnant women. This result seems robust in that the literature reviews considered hundreds of articles.“
http://parentingsquad.com/yes-you-can-dr…
http://www.stats.org/stories/2007/what_r…
“The study found that small doses of alcohol did not harm the baby’s cognitive development and in many cases, may have been beneficial to the child.” Small doses is defined as 1-2 drinks per week.
http://www.foodeu.com/articles/Drink+Lig…
@76 “If you drink, there is SOME harm.”
Nope. You’re assumptions are wrong, so your conclusions are shot.
Humans have spent tens of thousands of years being less than completely sober, and it’s worked out well for us.
I drank moderately (as in, an *occasional* glass of wine *with a meal*) during both of my recent pregnancies, after I’d successfully passsed the one-trimester mark (an especially intense time when baby’s neurons are getting knitted together) with all signals go, health-wise. Both of my kids were born healthy and with no complications. The point is to avoid *fetal alcohol syndrome* people (drunkenness is a no-no), so please don’t get all preachy. Plenty of women in Europe (and other less puritanical places than the U.S., too, I imagine) drink during pregnancy with no ill effects. In fact, in some countries, upon the announcement of the pregnancy, women actually have the tradition of gathering to toast the new-mother-to-be (who of course imbibes) with liqueurs considered special to the occasion. Lighten up!
Irena, the more I see you in action, the more I adore you!
Most of the harm that may have occurred, UNLESS YOU ARE DRINKING YOURSELF BLOTTO MOST NIGHTS LIKE AN ALKIE, occurred before the potential mother realized she was pregnant.
Now, smoking, on the other hand, that has really bad impacts during all of the pregnancy, but not as much at early stages.
@81: Thanks! *warm glow*
@82: Smoking is another thing entirely. But that’s for another thread.
I’m not in the field but it seems to me that, looking at the ‘yes alcohol’/’no alcohol’ studies that — durr — a small percentage of women can give their babies FAS by drinking only a few drinks, but most women won’t hurt the fetus drinking anything below a liver-killing amount. They just don’t know what the real X factor(s) is — and really, where the fuck are they going to get the data to say one way or another? It’s not exactly an experiment that can be carried out this side of Nazi Germany. To know the answer, we need to look more closely at the women whose kids have FAS after only a few drinks while pregnant, but it is probably way harder than it sounds to get a large test group of these women. Plus, it’s not exactly the sexiest disease/condition to cure; if you prohibit women from drinking the devil’s drink, it goes away. Is anyone even motivated to study it right now?
@84- “…we need to look more closely at the women whose kids have FAS after only a few drinks while pregnant, but it is probably way harder than it sounds to get a large test group of these women.”
Pretty much impossible, because you need to have observed the women 24/7 for forty weeks to make sure they’re not lying.
You mean people lie about how much they drink? Imagine that.
I’m pretty sure men lie about women and drinking all the time.
Hell, I was pregnant in Europe. I was drinking, smoking and having orgies in the hot tub. THOSE people know how to handle a life change.
Honestly, drinking while pregnant isn’t that bad. If you’re drinking ’til you pass out, that’s damaging, but think about the Middle Ages. At that time, water was unsafe to drink. Pretty much all anyone drank was ale. Did every baby have FAS? Um…no.
I think it’s selfish to take chances with your fetus’s health. However, I wouldn’t judge any woman who was following her doctor’s recommendations, even if that included a glass of wine with dinner. If it were me, I would give up alcohol all together- but then again, it wouldn’t exactly be a huge sacrifice for me to make. I probably haven’t had more than one or two drinks in the last nine months anyway. It wouldn’t be all that hard for me to go without. The thing I would really struggle with would be giving up caffiene. Going decaf for 9 mos. would be really difficult, so I imagine that for some women, going without a glass or two of wine would be next to impossible for them.
Also, no men can comment on this, because they get to drink all through their wive’s or baby momma’s pregnancies. They don’t have to change all that much. No 9 mos. of being a cow, no pushing a bowling ball out of their ass, no lactating, no breastfeeding, and they don’t do anywhere near the amount of caregiving as we women do. As long as your wife or girlfriend is following doctor’s orders, I would suggest you shut the hell up about what she should and shouldn’t be eating or drinking.