Comments

1
You can't post Zophar without even the slightest hint of explanation. BOO.
2
If you read any of those posts from Canada wondering how Americans could be so stupid as to elect Republicans, just reply with the link to this post. It explains a lot.
3
I would call #6 "Pacman Ghost Apple".





And did we really need to see #5's ass crack? Yuck.
4
Some of those were pretty 'meh' in the middle there but then I Ass Obama and Hick Life were a strong one-two punch of "what the christ"
5
Also who the hell goes to Nicaragua and things "this is where I'm gonna get that tattoo I've been wanting"?
6
I too would loooove an explanation re: Zophar.
7
Wow. Now those are some really bad decisions on display. Still, for sheer stupidity of sentiment combined with unthinkable ugliness, I gotta go with Hick Life.
8
Yah what the hell @Zophar? How in tarnation could that possibly be "unintentionally" sexual?!?!?
9
It blows my mind that Hick Life is only in second place. That monstrosity needs to be ejected from the stratosphere.
10
Just tap that Black Lotus for three mana and sacrifice it. Problem solved.
11
Would the world really be a better place without Zophar?
12
Damn, @3 beat me to it. I was gonna suggest instead of removing it they get it changed to a Pac-Man ghost.
13
I voted for Zophar, but Ass Obama made me laugh out loud.
14
I kind of adore the copyright 1972 tattoo.
15
The Hick Life is maybe the most horrible, but I feel like that person is probably an asshole. I'll have to find the second worst.
16
Fuzzy Fuzzy Scorpion is cool.
17
These poor people. Can't we take a collection and have them all removed? Maybe not Obama, though, that's a nice one.
18
"Hick Life" is exactly the way it's supposed to be: crude, it was meant to be ugly and hick-ish from conception through execution. That's why it's losing to Zophar, which was probably an honest attempt at artistry that went horribly wrong. I'll vote for righting a legitimate wrong over fixing someone's purposely bad choice any day.
19
@14 I do too.

I can't vote for any that are in not-normally-seen places. Zophar should win (WTF?!), but I voted for the Nicaraguan mother because there was no explanation of what that horrid tattoo was supposed to be.
20
I feel like Charles could, nay, should write a lengthy article on the implications of "Hick Life".
21
@14 seconded, (C)1972 is adorable.

Also, Ass Obama should be persevered... for posterity...
22
The black lotus looks just fine. Does Nicole have the rest of the Power Nine tattooed on her?
23
@21: posteriority.
24
Zophar wins, Hick Life is a strong second, and I think Ass Obama should be preserved as is in perpetuity.
25
I have a copyright tattoo just like that, but not over my ass crack, thank goodness.
26
I would rock the shit out of Zophar. Bad, terrible, weird, awesome. That's the type of WTF tattoo I like to see. Voted for Hick Life for the obvious reason, but part of me thinks he deserves to wear that for life...just because.
27
Definitely Zophar. Hick Life second. I like Ass Obama, and Black Lotus is neither bad nor embarrassing, compared to the rest of the crop. I feel sorry for the owners of all these, except AO and BL. Wot no Bacon Dynamite?
28
I agree with Banna @18. Sure, "Hick Life" is ugly, but it was intentionally ugly. Plus, the removal request isn't even submitted by the bearer of the tattoo; it was submitted by his mother. Maybe the son still likes it. It's ugly, but not deserving of my vote.

Zophar wins for WTF value. That definitely needs to go.

"Suck Ink" will need more than simple tattoo removal to get rid of the underlying scar tissue. I feel sorry for the dude, but laser removal treatment will only get him part way to his goal.

29
@Ass Obama, you should know better... you deserve to live with that tattoo another decade at least.
30
@5 "...that tattoo OF MY MOTHER'S FACE I've been wanting" no less! Barf.

I dunno, after last year's winner's tragic story behind her awful tattoo, I think all of these people deserve to be stuck with their mistakes. Lost a bet? Shouldn't have gambled with your ass. Got a tramp stamp? Way to buy into a trend. Didn't know what that Japanese character you picked off the wall actually meant? *facepalm*

Would have voted for Zophar if a story had been included with it. I voted for Washington Apple, because at least that tattoo had some sort of meaning behind it.
31
These people made a choice for life. I think they should suffer the consequences (or pay for the removal their damn selves) so I decided not to vote. I mean, what kind of dumbass makes a tattoo bet? The sort of dumbass that deserves to have it for life, because that's the bet.
32
@22: Now I want a tattoo of Mox Sapphire (tapped) + Ancestral Recall. But I was like "NOPE, sorry Black Lotus, you can't quit Magic that easily!"
33
@30, see that's why tramp-stamp 16 y/o is such a good choice. She struck out on a level-headed parent. Let's at least give her this win in life.
34
I voted for hick life but now I wish I'd voted for the mom portrait. Also, I wish I could know the net worth of the people who entered. Some of these could probably afford to pay for the removal themselves, while others couldn't.
35
@31 you assume that we are the same people we were in the past when in fact we are new people. That said I agree about the tattoo bet, that's just idiotic.
36
i voted for washington apple.

but that being said - OWN IT!

i have many many tattoos and have been subsequently banned from an onsen near where i live, but i'm not ashamed because i made good choices. good choices = art that is meaningful to me, well placed, and done with a professional and kind hand.

if you aren't doing these things than you deserve the shit tattoos that you get.
37
I'm thinking quite a few of these would exceed the 4x4 requirement, right?
38
Fletcher.....hick life he'$ a 20 year old who go drunk and need i say more


Well need i say more...he is a kool kat.....
39
@30: I don't think people "deserve" to be stuck with a bad tattoo forever because they made a bad decision. Especially in the case where the tattooist turned out to be bad.
40
Everyone who is ever about to get a tattoo should have to read this post.
41
Sorry, you're taking Ass Obama to the grave. It is awesome. It will be even better in 20 years.

42
Fletcher.....hick life is a super guy just got drunk and well
Need i say more...he's funny
He's a cool kat....
43
While I can understand wanting to hold people responsible for their bad choices, I think it's pretty unreasonable to want teenagers to suffer for ages over their poor decisions. Of course sixteen year olds make poor decisions, that's pretty much the job of a sixteen year old. At that age, you're learning how to make decent decisions, and failing (a lot) is part of the learning process. I also can't really hold it against people who set out to get a nice tattoo and ended up with a bad tattoo artist. But I do think it's reasonable to have sympathy for teenagers stuck paying for normal teen screw-ups after they have grown up and learned better. Really, on the scale of teen screw-ups, this is fairly reasonable. It's not like their screw-ups hurt others, and plenty of mistakes teenagers make do.
44
Omg....hick life hates that crap
He just works so as a good mom
I am trying to help him correct
This unforgiving mistake ....lol
45
I kinda think anyone who gets a politician's face permanently applied to their person should have to live with that shame for the rest of their life.
46
If you're going to get a tattoo, have the tattoo artist draw it on paper first, then at least you know if they're good or not.

Oh, and you have to spend some cash. You get what you pay for.

I can't believe how many people just drop in and want to get tattooed on a whim. Do some fucking research before you get tattooed people. It's permanent.
47
Zophar rules! The beefy arms coming out of the back of its neck remind me of Trogdor.
48
i'm glad so many think ass obama should be kept.
49
If that woman is 31, then the term "tramp stamp" absolutely was widely known when she was 16.
50
I would have voted for "Hick Life" but his mother submitted the entry. Maybe the owner of the tattoo actually likes it and thinks it's hilarious ā€” in which case it serves as a useful signifier for the rest of us to make an informed decision to avoid him. I like informative labels.

I think a lot of the rest of these are kind of cute.
51
I'm the Zophar chick :P As far as an explanation, there isn't really an interesting story, I picked it out of a flash book when I was piercing in a shop 11 years ago and the bored (novice) apprentice zapped it on my leg. It really wasn't supposed to come out looking like that! The shading in the crotch somehow ended up looking... phallic :c
52
I also am delighted that others want to preserve Ass Obama. We should take up a collection to convince her to keep it! I voted for Hick Life even though I feel like the kid (young man, whatever) should really have to live with it for quite a while to truly learn his lesson.
53
thanks @49, came here to say the same thing. I'm 2 years older than her and the term "tramp stamp" was already common knowledge 15 years ago.
54
Voting would be so much easier if we could just do it championship bracket style. And then the votes probably wouldn't fall so hard on the 1st and last entries.
55
That lotus looks lahk a bunch o' teats.
56
@51,
You saw that thing on a flash page?? I thought flash was supposed to be simple stuff like stars and dolphins and fruit and flowers... what on earth made you want that weird thing anyway?
57
I like Zophar. I think you should wear it proudly!
58
Blurry Taz is cute. Ass Obama (and Ass Obama's owner) are cute. WA Apple is cute.
59
Tough, tough choice from Zophar, Drink, and Hick Life. Zophar is stupid and hideous, but not that distinct unless you look up close. Drink comes from a venerably stupid category of body art, t-shirts, and bumper stickers: the unknown Asian character. But Hick Life is just the whole package: huge, obviously visible, badly done, with content that marks its wearer as scum. Help Trish's son, everybody!

The good news: I'm getting a tattoo removed right now (I, too, didn't know about tramp stamps and thought nobody but intimates would ever see it, then... low-rise pants, ah ha ha ha haaaaa!) and it's not all that painful, it's working faster than expected, and it's so worth it to get my skin back. You can get some good deals out there. Don't resign yourself to shitty ink.
60
went with creepy drag queen mother, seems most of them either deserve the suffering for a little longer (seriously, you now want to laser away your cover up? also the Obama one, the winning and the hick life need a few more years for the valuable life lesson to sink in) or they are so small they could pay for the removal themselves.
the owner of the creepy drag queen mother also got what he payed for but for the sake of his mother and wife he got my vote.

*disclaimer, i have more tattooed skin than all these people combined and while i certainly have tattoos i wouldnt get today there a none that i regret, they are testaments to who i was when i got them and they fused with my body, removing them would be like chopping of a finger. the kind of people who have tattoos that (they think) need removing are the people who never should have gotten them in the first place and deserve in my view to suffer for their stupidity for a long long time. ( i'll make a small exclusion for former gang members and neo-nazi's and stuff like that, not that i think one should get gang or nazi symbols tattooed in the first place but getting those removed or covered is a healthy sign of becoming a better person)
61
Ty prettybetty.....
62
Prettybetsy....oops sorry
63
I'd draw a distinction between poor subject matter selection and poor execution. If you didn't think through the subject matter, that's too damned bad. You can pay for your own coverup. If the subject matter was thoughtful but the artist was terrible, I have more sympathy. On that basis the Creepy Drag Queen Mother got my vote.
64
I wonder what would happen if Zophar was moved to the middle of the pile? I know I was initially swayed by her plea, but definitely didn't feel like it's the worst of the worst. I'm not sure why she hasn't tried to find another artist to do something else with it. It has a lot of potential for a good re-work.
65
@39 I disagree. I think you should do your research and ask to see a portfolio of any professional tattoo artist before letting them ink your skin. As for the amateur tattoo artists, they were presumably cheap/free tattoos, and as with all things in life, you get what you pay for.

Besides, none of these people are truly *stuck* with these tattoos. They can get them lasered whenever they like, I'm just not voting for them to get that treatment for free.
66
Voted for Zophar. @51, you're welcome. Still, unintentionally sexual? That thing looks X-rated to me, and not in a good way.

Butt-bama, we have to wait to determine its legacy. It's too soon to say whether it comes off that ass.

67
So the worst one won (good! That's the one I voted for).

Just like Congress (I did not vote for the worst there, Kentucky isn't my fault).
68
Why would Someone get Obama's portrait on his Ass? what an Arse!!!:P

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