Big news, tweets Bristol Palin, along with a link that takes you here:

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I wanted you guys to be the first to know that I am pregnant. Honestly, I’ve been trying my hardest to keep my chin up on this one. At the end of the day there’s nothing I can’t do with God by my side, and I know I am fully capable of handling anything that is put in front of me with dignity and grace. Life moves on no matter what. So no matter how you feel, you get up, get dressed, show up, and never give up. When life gets tough, there is no other option but to get tougher.

This will be Bristol Palin's second child. This one is either by her second ex-fiance or some poor man to be named later. There's more from Bristol here, if you're so inclined and you have a high tolerance for platitudes (I'm not and I don't), and here are three things I gotta get off my chest...

1. If Bristol Palin's last name was "Obama" the whole Hee Haw gang at Fox News would spend half of every day for the next nine months telling us that Bristol Obama has terrible parents—"Maybe Michelle should be less concerned with what your kids are eating and more concerned with what her kids are doing!"—and the other half of the day pretending to fret over the terrible example that Bristol Obama was setting for other African American women and girls. But unplanned pregnancies and kids in fatherless homes and two different children by two different fathers? IOIYAR.

2. Does anyone remember what Bristol Palin had to say back when Barack Obama endorsed marriage equality for the first time as president? (He had previously endorsed gay marriage back when he was a candidate for state office in Illinois in 1996.) President Obama told ABC News that Sasha and Malia's perspective had informed his own. Both of his daughters had friends with gay and lesbian parents. It didn't "make sense to them," the president said, "that somehow their friends’ parents would be treated differently."

Here's what Bristol Palin had to say about that:

While it’s great to listen to your kids’ ideas, there’s also a time when dads simply need to be dads. In this case, it would’ve been helpful for him to explain to Malia and Sasha that while her friends parents are no doubt lovely people, that’s not a reason to change thousands of years of thinking about marriage. Or that—as great as her friends may be—we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home. Ideally, fathers help shape their kids’ worldview.

The irony here? Besides that Bristol Palin opposes same-sex marriage because she believes that kids—other than her own—need to grow up mother/father homes? We now know that Obama's story about Malia and Sasha is bullshit. Both probably have friends with gay and lesbian parents—they live in White House, after all, and they go to Sidwell Friends—but seeing as Obama was for marriage equality all along it was Obama who shaped his daughters' views on marriage equality and not the other way around.

So, hey, it looks like Obama was doing what you wanted him to do, Bristol: He wasn't listening to his kids. He was shaping their worldview. Happy now?

3. Here you go, Bristol—not for right now, of course. For right after your next child is born into a fatherless home. You're welcome.

4. Bonus thing: you have to watch Bristol Palin's abstinence ed PSA at the top of the post. Holy crap.

UPDATE: Wonkette rounds up some more choice quotes from B. Palin, including...

[Oprah] Winfrey told Bristol she “kind of bristled” when she learned the teen recently told In Touch magazine, “I’m not going to have sex until I’m married. I can guarantee it” and wondered if such a promise was “realistic.” […]

“I’m just wondering if that’s a realistic goal,” said Winfrey.

“It’s a realistic goal for myself,” replied Bristol.