Really, really, really terrible:

I believe that marriage is not just a bond, but a sacred bond between a man and a woman. I have had occasion in my life to defend marriage. To stand up for marriage. To believe in the hard work and challenge of marriage. So I take umbrage at anyone who might suggest that those of us who worry about amending the Constitution are less committed to the sanctity of marriage or to the fundamental, bedrock principle that it exists between a man and a woman going back into the mists of history as one of the founding, foundational institutions of history and humanity and civilization and that it's primary, principal role during those millennia has been the raising and socializing of children for the society into which they are to become adult.

Sponsored

Hillary said that when she was in the U.S. Senate—and, in case you didn't pick up on it, she was speaking in opposition to a constitutional amendment that would've banned same-sex marriage in all fifty states. Lots of pro-gay-rights-but-not-there-yet-on-marriage Dems employed the same rhetorical strategy in their effort to defeat an anti-gay-marriage amendment to the U.S. Constitution: "Hey, you guys, no one hates the idea of gay marriage more than I do—I mean, ugh, history and children and mists of time and shit—but I nevertheless oppose amending the Constitution to ban it."

Hillary's remarks in the Senate are basically an EP version of Barack Obama's infamous comments on marriage equality when he was running for president in 2007: "“I believe that marriage is the union between a man and a woman. For me, as a Christian, it's also a sacred union. God's in the mix.” (Ha ha! Remember when Obama pretended to oppose marriage equality and we pretended to believe him? Those were the days!)

Anyway, I heard this long, awful, insulting, ahistorical, kid-mongering, deep-in-denial quote on The Fire You Can't Put Out, a "progressive political podcast" out of Spokane, Washington, of all places. (Those aren't scare quotes; that's how the host of the show describes it. And it's a good show and I'm enjoying it—check it out on iTunes.) Melvin, the host of TFYCPO, is totally in the tank for Bernie Sanders—and, hey, so am I! But I'm also in the tank for Hillary Clinton. You could say I'm bitankual: In both tanks at once. The monotankual host of TFYCPO is in the tank for Bernie and he can't imagine why anyone who backed gay marriage then (like me) could possibly support Hillary Clinton now (like I do*).

Well, I'm for Hillary—or Bernie or both Hillary and Bernie (or Bernie and Hillary)—and I disagreed with her on marriage equality then... but I am capable of taking yes for a motherfucking answer now.

Melvin isn't alone. A lot of progressives are slamming Hillary for her past position on marriage equality and the rather noxious comments she made back then—which, again, are similar to the rather noxious comments made by most Dems at the time, including Barack Obama (who said the exact same shit, in fewer words)—and, like the host of TFYCPO, they hammer and hammer away at it. And you know what? Most of the people I see out there hammering away at this—most of them, not all of them—are straight. Oh, there are queer folks doing it too. But it's mostly straight people and, man, are they losing their patience with queers who support Hillary. But straight or gay, here's what I have to say to those who can't understand why any gay person could possibly support Hillary over Bernie—or, like me, support Hillery and/or Bernie—when Bernie Always Had the Right Position On Marriage Equality and Hillary Used To Have the Wrong Position on Marriage Equality.

We're taking motherfucking yes for a motherfucking answer.

Hillary Clinton's support for marriage equality may be a political calculation. And you know what? We worked hard to change the math so that those political calculations would start adding up in our favor. So sincere change of heart or political calculation—either way—I will take it.

It's fucking moronic—it's political malpractice—to attack a politician for coming around on your issues. There are lots of other issues the queer community is going to be pressing politicians on, from passing equal rights bills and trans rights bills to defeating anti-trans bathroom legislation and RFRAs. If pols who are currently on the wrong side of any of those issues see no benefit to changing their positions—if they see no political benefit—they're going to be harder to persuade. Why should they come around on our issues, why should they switch sides or change their votes, if we're going to go after them hammer and tongs for the positions they used to hold? ("Please change your mind and support us." "No." "Pretty please?" "OK, I've changed my mind and I'll vote to support you." "FUCK YOU FOR NOT ALWAYS AGREEING WITH ME! I'M NOT VOTING FOR YOU! FUCK YOU SOME MORE!")

Queer people who are doing this? We're fucking ourselves with this shit, not Clinton. Stop it. Straight people who are doing this shit? You may be hurting Clinton but you're also hurting the queers you claim to care so much about. Stop it.

Oh, and to those who say we should support Bernie—and only Bernie—because he was always for marriage equality... turns out, not so much:

Sanders said he opposes the constitutional amendment. States for years have had authority over marriage laws and that's the way it should remain, he said, noting that Vermont had led the nation in creating the civil unions law granting most of the rights and benefits of marriage to gay and lesbian couples.

He noted that Vermont "led the way," but it was "a very divisive debate." Asked whether Vermont should legalize full marriage rights for same-sex couples, he said: "Not right now, not after what we went through."

Support The Stranger

Sanders didn't justify his opposition to marriage equality—back in 2006—on the same grounds Clinton did. No bullshit about mists of time, no think-of-the-children fear-mongering. (OMG! If we let the gays get married, who will socialize the children?!?) But Sanders used to oppose marriage equality too. He also used to support letting the states decide who can and can't get married—which means Sanders had the same position then that Marco Rubio and Donald Trump have now.

So! Sanders and Clinton—neither one was always perfect on marriage. But they're both on our side now.

* Also supporting Bernie! I'm bitankual! Anyone who says I'm in the tank for Hillary without mentioning the fact that I'm in the tank for Bernie too is contributing to bitankual invisibility! Just say no to bitankual erasure!