SIFF

(FILM FESTIVAL) Oh yeah, there's, like, this film festival that sort of starts this week or whatever. There's a bunch of movies at it and some movie stars and a bunch of other stuff that has to do with movies, too. SEAN NELSON

SIFF runs from Thurs May 18 through Sun June 11 at various theaters; see The Stranger's SIFF Bible in this issue for theaters and showtimes.

The Bottom Project

(DANCE/MULTIMEDIA) Julie Tolentino has appeared in Madonna's book Sex, on Red Hot & Blue's "Safe Sex Is Hot Sex" poster, and in fashion spreads for Out magazine. She co-authored the Lesbian AIDS Project's Women's Safer Sex Handbook, and she's the host of New York City's Clit Club--but she's also a rising dancer/choreographer who'll be bringing her latest solo piece, The Bottom Project: First Installation, to On the Boards. A longtime member of David Rousseve/REALITY, Tolentino has a resume as long as your arm. She's either got 10 times the energy of a normal human being or she's a shallow dilettante--either way, this promises to be an entertaining show. Plus, she's got lots of tattoos. BRET FETZER

On the Boards, 100 W Roy St, 217-9888, Thurs-Sun May 18-21, 8 pm, $10-$12.

American Pimp

(FILM) You know a movie is good when it can make you laugh heartily even as it fills you with a despair so profound you can't find words to express it for days afterward. Welcome to the new documentary by the Hughes Brothers (sibling auteurs of Menace II Society and Dead Presidents), which traces the proud heritage and current state of the mack in America, and raises the stakes significantly on Pimps Up, Ho's Down. The pimps interviewed in this documentary (alongside a scant few ho's) are fast-talking, funny, charismatic, fascinating, and deeply, irrevocably evil. A complex portrait of a profession that has run the cultural gamut between villainization, lionization, and punch line, AP doesn't flinch; it finds both the glory and the shame of the pimp (pronounced "PEE-ump") game, and through the abundant laughter--both at and with the subjects--you find yourself all-the-way unsettled. Though the context of prostitution is a challenging one to navigate morally, the film is ultimately about manipulation, desperation, and delusion--three themes that qualify as universal. SEAN NELSON

Grand Illusion, 1403 NE 50th St, 523-3935, Fri-Thurs May 19-25 at (Sat-Sun 1, 3), 5, 7, 9, $7.50.

Skagit River Poetry Festival

(READINGS/ROAD TRIP) Now that the tulips have all withered and died, you can get to the Skagit Valley without asphyxiating yourself on car exhaust. And since you'll be so clear-headed, you might as well listen to some great poetry! The La Conner School District is hosting the first biennial Skagit River Poetry Festival, and they've lined up the likes of Lorna Dee Cervantes, Jane Hirshfield, Thomas Lux, Heather McHugh, Robert Sund, James Bertolino, Tim McNulty, Sam Green, and Michael Daley. Readings will be held, sometimes simultaneously, at various sites throughout La Conner. Vive la Valley! TRACI VOGEL

Information and ticket orders: www.skagitriverpoetry.org, 800-804-8406; Fri evening, $10, and Sat all day, $15.

57 Varieties of Movement, Bare Bones

(DANCE) This weekend offers two mini-festivals of dance: Bare Bones plays Saturday night only and features prominent local names like Mary Sheldon Scott/Jarrad Powell Performance, John Dixon, Sheri Cohen, Kristin Hapke, Margit Galanter, and more--but 57 Varieties of Movement features choreography by 9- and 10-year-old girls, Art/Food Dance, and a tap-dancing trio in their 70s. Since 57 Varieties plays on Thursday and Friday as well as Saturday, go see them both and get a full sampling of local work. BRET FETZER

57 Varieties plays at Chamber Theater, Oddfellows Building, 915 E Pine, Fourth Floor, 368-9446, Thurs-Sat May 18-20, 8 pm; $10 advance, $12 at the door. Bare Bones plays at Dance on Capitol Hill's Underground Theater, 340 15th Ave E, 329-5104, Sat May 20, 8 pm; $10 suggested donation.

Flirting

(L'AMOUR) Spread secret smiles across the city. Bat your lashes, lock eyes across a crowded room, embrace all the clichés of spring and hormones and flesh and lips and shivering pleasure. Linger a moment too long next to the hottie in the dairy aisle at the QFC. Shoot meaningful looks at your barista. Compliment your bartender's tattoo. Flirting is the best fair-weather sport (after baseball, of course--though Safeco Field is as good a place as any to mack on a cutie), and you don't have to worry about injuries. Consider it a karmic investment; make someone's day, send a little attention their way, and reap the rewards later on. So, The Stranger suggests prolific, indiscriminate, reckless, harmless, delicious flirting today. ERIN FRANZMAN

"Mack on a cutie" anywhere cuties can be found. At the Laundromat, for example.

Grant Cogswell

(READING) Monorail guy (and Stranger writer) Grant Cogswell has more on his mind than solving transit problems. A LOT MORE! For a sneak peek into Mr. Cogswell's manic mind (salmon and porno theaters), come hear him read from the heady punk-rock poem "Pacific Bell"--part one of his serial poem The Dream of the Cold War. Apparently, it's a hushed precursor to part two, which is rumored to make use of a bull horn and body paint. JOSH FEIT

Little Theatre, 608 19th Ave E, 675-2055, 7:30 pm, $3.

Michael Ondaatje

(READINGS) The maestro of mood, the monarch of metaphor, Michael Ondaatje comes to town courtesy of Seattle Arts & Lectures to read from and discuss Anil's Ghost, his new novel. Ghost floats backwards from an elliptical opening, pulling terror and brutality into a personal narrative set in Sri Lanka. This is sure to be a popular event, so get there early. TRACI VOGEL

Town Hall, 1119 Eighth Ave at Seneca, 322-7030, 7:30 pm, $12.

Working Title

(ART) Much of art is labor intensive, and Working Title proves it. Curator Heather Dwyer has brought together four artists whose work invites speculation on how it was done--just what happened between the light bulb going off over the head and the finished piece. Cut-out paper collages by Nikki McClure are unbelievably intricate and bring to mind a chain carved out of a single matchstick. Thess Fenner has created a friendly camera on wheels that zooms around viewers' feet; it's controlled from a balcony above the gallery, and the controlling hand can only see where the vehicle is going via the surveillance camera mounted on it. Todd Kephart's elaborately staged photographs and Matt Sellars' smooth wood sculptures round out the show which, unfortunately, is in Kirkland--but you should go anyway. EMILY HALL

Kirkland Arts Center, 620 Market St, Kirkland, 425-822-7161, Mon-Fri, 11 am-6 pm, through June 2.

Alain de Botton

(READINGS) The declensions of young love, the hallways of Proust--and now, the patterns of philosophical thought: Is there anything Alain de Botton cannot make both charming and companionable? Perhaps one of the most engaging solipsists of our time, de Botton graces Seattle with a rare visit, to read from The Consolations of Philosophy, which extracts tinctures of wisdom from classical philosophy to refresh our lives. Marry me, Alain de Botton. TRACI VOGEL

Seattle Public Library, 1000 Fourth Ave, 386-4650, 7 pm, free (no advance tickets).

Super Super 8 2000

(FILMS) Since Super 8 is to movies what vinyl is to music, it only makes sense for a mini-festival of handmade shorts to alight at one of Seattle's finest nightclub/laundromats. Super Super 8 is a multidisciplinary touring show, and part of the Satellites 2000 Festival (see review this issue) that coincides with another, slightly more prominent film festival also starting this week. Highlights of this defiantly undie event are more about the challenge of showing tired eyes something new-looking than telling a story; the shorts are heavily textured, powerfully kinetic, jumpy, weird, and in some cases, totally inscrutable. There's a Pervert in Our Pool--a totally bizarre animation collage of pictures of history's notorious lotharios (Woody Allen, Bill Clinton, Fatty Arbuckle) bobbing and dunking in a bathtub with Playboy cut-outs while somebody reads fractured poetry--is a good example of the dustbin ingenuity that makes this once-obsolete medium so vital. Add to the mix the musical accompaniment of no less a sax blower than Skerik (and a full bar), and you've got yourself quite a Wednesday night, n'est-ce pas? SEAN NELSON

Sit & Spin, 2219 Fourth Ave, 441-9484, 8 pm, $7.