One of the occupational hazards of working for a weekly publication is never knowing what the date is. Because I'm always thinking at least two weeks in advance in order to make deadlines, I'm forever showing up to clubs to see a band that's not playing for another week. Or I miss the band altogether, because by the time the show date finally gets here, its significance has long since fallen into the trash compactor at the back of my brain, which makes room for a whole other load of names and dates. This exasperating phenomenon explains why I was able to assume that an April Fool's joke was being played on music industry followers when I read that former Soundgarden frontman Chris Cornell has been in rehearsal with Rage Against the Machine, and that he is being considered to replace that band's departed leader, Zack de la Rocha. Here it is nearing the end of March, I thought with an inner chuckle, so this has GOT to be an early gag. Chris Cornell fronting the stompy, ultra political Rage Against the Machine... HEE! Waitasecond... it's still February. Never in the history of practical jokedom has anyone been so impatient as to unleash an April Fool's joke in February. My mind spun with dawning realization, and then... "CHRIST ON A JELL-O CRUTCH!" I yelled aloud (prompting the therapist next door to pound yet again on the wall separating us). This shit was serious. If this ridiculous pairing were to come to fruition, it would be the Van Hagar of the decade. Has a more stupid idea ever been hatched? And what would this mean for the requisite Soundgarden reunion--we all know that's coming up sooner or later. Isn't it clearly stated in every Seattle band's contract that the band must break up for a while (some for mere weeks, while others dramatically drag it out for years) in order to keep the fans gagging for more? Time, and all reality it would seem, has truly been thrown off its course.

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I had a lovely Valentine's Day (thank you for asking), spent in part with Aveo, S, and the Cock-Ups at the Crocodile. But my most intriguing holiday surprise came in the form of a three-song demo CD enclosed in a card requesting I be the valentine of a local band named Popstar Assassins. I'm very happy to report that the disc, recorded by Silkworm's Tim Midgett, proved to be right up my alley and the band has driven straight into my heart. "Stranger Music Section + Popstar Assassins = TLA?? Yes? No?" asked the hearts- and monkey-covered valentine. Let me think it over for a moment... fast and frenzied guitar with plenty of jangle, sweetly contemplative lyrics sung by a guy who can actually sing, and a Valentine's Day card with a monkey on it? My answer most definitely would be "yes." You can see what all the swooning is about when Popstar Assassins open for the Minders at the Crocodile on Wednesday, March 7.

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Backing up a bit to Aveo: The up-and-coming band on everybody's brain these days has just finished recording its first full-length album with producer to the stars (Built to Spill, Unwound) Phil Ek. Mark my words, this band is going to be the next breakthrough act to come out of Seattle. Be sure to check these guys out before they're playing KeyArena.