From my Frequently Asked Questions file...
Are you a real dominatrix? Is that really your picture?
Yes, I'm really a dominatrix, meaning someone who does BDSM professionally as well as personally. And yes, that's really my photo--come to one of my kinky sex workshops or buy my video if you doubt it. But if you spot me out buying groceries or pumping gas in dirty blue jeans, it would be bad manners to officially recognize me.
Were you abused as a child?
Nope. I had the most non-traumatic, boringly normal childhood you can imagine. But I suspect 12 years of Catholic school may have had something to do with it.
You're too nice; you don't act like a dominatrix.
To paraphrase Gloria Steinem, this is what a dominatrix acts like. I know the popular notion of a BDSM mistress is something like Cruella De Vil coming off a three-day crystal meth jag. But the mistress or master who tries to demonstrate "true dominance" by being flamboyantly bitchy to waiters and sales clerks merely betrays her or his insecurity. I much prefer the Hannibal Lecter school of soft-spoken, beautifully mannered intimidation.
How do I get to be your personal submissive?
If I meet you at a BDSM event, impress me with your social skills and personal boundaries, and then wait for me to approach you.
What doesn't work is sending me badly written e-mails explaining that you're a real and true slave, which you'll demonstrate by allowing me to fulfill any of your fantasies I want. JPEGs of your genitals don't excite me, either.
Have you ever been submissive?
Yes, a fair amount--mostly when I was newer at BDSM. Nowadays I'm far more inclined to be dominant. There are a few people around who appeal to my take-me, make-me streak--one of them is my partner, Max. Frankly, though, I'm not terribly good at being submissive. Usually the best I can do is just be really polite while Max indulges my highly specific masochistic tastes. And sometimes I'm not even all that polite.
What's the weirdest thing you've ever done?
I once attended a huge "wedding expo" at the Tacoma Dome. It was, hands down, the most bizarre thing I have ever experienced.
