Barnacles luscious, irresistible countertop jamón serrano. No wonder they made the list.
Barnacle's luscious, irresistible countertop jamón serrano. No wonder they made the list. Sea Creatures

Barnacle Makes Esquire's Top 24 Bars List

Renee Erickson's companion bar to the Walrus and Carpenter, Barnacle, has been named one of Esquire's top 24 bars nationwide. They described it as a place "where an off-duty Steve Zissou might drink," and lauded its "pig in a vise," "fat sardines" from the tin, and "meaty and green" olives. The pig in a vise they refer to is the traditional jamón serrano station, the sardines are indeed fire, and everyone loves Castelvetranos. I knew Barnacle was the real deal when, stuck waiting for a table at Walrus, we stopped in for drinks, had a lengthy and informative conversation with the man closest to the jamón about wine, attempted to order some from him, and were informed he was just the cook. If the cook can be trusted to steer you to the right rosé, they're obviously doing something right. Congrats!

Seattle Soda Tax Passes Out of Committee

As you may have heard, the Seattle City Council is contemplating a soda tax, like the ones that recently passed in Berkeley and Chicago's Cook County. To lay my bias bare, I'm fully in support of such a tax—as Marion Nestle put it, "There's no question it's a regressive tax, but so is type 2 diabetes."—so I'm happy to report that the tax just made it out of the council's finance committee in a 5-2 vote:

Beekman's Twitter thread includes the play-by-play of all the amendments and is worth a read, but the big takeaways are exemptions for diet soda, as well as a special exemption for small, artisan soda makers like Rachel's Ginger Beer. The full council votes on it today.

Speaking of Rachel's Ginger Beer...

Their University Village location, with its in-house Ma'ono Chicken and Whisky, opens this Friday, June 9, according to Seattle Met. I'm sure all the lovers of consumer goods north of the cut will be thrilled to have the additional sustenance. After all, shopping is very tiring—I've heard you can even "drop" from it.

Molly Moon's Columbia City Location Is Officially Open

In other opening news that will surely be just as thrilling to moms with means, Molly Moon's Columbia City is officially open. They were not thrilled that I described them as an ultra-white business, and sent me a long email about their equitable hiring process and diversity stats (which are admirable and great and they deserve a shitload of kudos for!), so I feel I should offer some clarification here: I did not mean that their staff is super white. I meant that their concept is something that would eventually have inspired a post from Stuff White People Like, had they stuck with it. I apologize for any confusion.

Bob Ferguson, Always Looking Out For You

Washington's swoon-worthy AG, Bob Ferguson, has done a lot of admirable shit recently, like fighting the Trump administration tooth and nail on immigration and weed, most notably. However, he's not done doing solids for the people of this fine state, and Eater has the scoop on a recent solid he did for us related to sushi.

Certain unscrupulous eateries were found to be mislabeling the fish they served—tilapia passing as Tai red snapper and such like—and Bob delivered a furious smackdown upon them. Oto Sushi of Redmond and Sushi Tokyo of Seattle have been ordered to properly label their fish, and will pay thousands in fines related to their deception. It's not quite as vital as reversing Trump's bigoted executive orders, but it is a great example of how consistently awesome he is, even on the small things.

Melt Melts Away

I write every one of these columns from Bar Sue, because they have wifi and I have to have at least three cans of Modelo in me to do anything productive, so I can report firsthand that their grilled cheese window is officially closed. Co-owner Chris tells me that it's because they lost their most reliable kitchen guy to a nursing home gig, which is baffling, but they do have someone else lined up already. No word yet on what the window's next iteration will be exactly, but it will be courtesy of Lex Petras. He's the guy behind The Atlantic, an airy Central District farm-to-table spot, and Altstadt, the German bierhaus where I once ate a lovely fish wrapped in a copy of The Stranger. If you love Bar Sue, you're psyched. If you don't love Bar Sue, what are you even doing with your life?

West Seattle's Newest Sports Bar

Hawk's Nest West is now open on Alki, in the former Alki Huddle space, West Seattle Blog reports. Though it's a regular ol' sports bar, this is Seattle 2017 and of course they have poke on the menu. I don't even have a joke for this. I just give up at this point. The raw fish fad has won.

Even Eater is Over Poke

You know that when my esteemed and eminently neutral Eater counterpart Adam Callaghan writes "Even jaded poke fans may want to take note" as an addendum to an announcement of new poke restaurants, we've reached a point of oversaturation. The announcement in question refers to Ahipoki Bowl, a California/Arizona chain that's opening locations in Shoreline and Renton sometime this summer. The recommendation to take note centers on the company being known for offering discounts and the occasional free poke bowl. Whoop-dee-fucking-doo.

This AmazonFresh Video Makes Me Want to Die

Do we really want to trade the minor inconvenience of shopping for groceries for a sleek, ultra-efficient, extremely depersonalized techno-hell? Apparently we do, because Amazon only does shit that makes money, and I'm sure AmazonFresh Pickup will make boatloads of it. Can't wait to sit silently in my car as a minimum wage worker loads groceries into the trunk, avoiding eye contact and swallowing my shame at being complicit in the increasingly alienating social system being built by our city's tech giants.