My Gay Husband has been very glum lately, and nothing, not even my pork chops with collard greens, seems to help. He’s been diagnosed with painful spinal arthritis, which is strange since he’s only in his early 30s. (And if you happen to be an attractive Latino man with broad shoulders and a square jaw, you should know that Gay Husband is a hottie who could pass for 27, has a great sense of humor, and can make a mean beef stew. I’m just saying.) So I took GH and his creaky spine out to dinner, in the hopes of lifting his spirits with red wine and red meat.
Sam’s Steakhouse, fairly new and a self-proclaimed “neighborhood steakhouse” on Eastlake, was an appropriate solution. Besides offering our favorite kind of menu–steakhouse classics, honest American family sit-down-dinner stuff–this restaurant impressed us with its earnest, super-smart concept. With neon beer signs in the window, comfortable tables, warm, vaguely Midwestern décor, unflappably pleasant servers, and views of Lake Union, this place is easy and non-threatening, without a stitch of pretension. And on certain evenings when you are feeling a certain way, this kind of experience–where the bread just keeps coming and the most difficult decision you have to make is whether you want mashed, baked, or fried potatoes with your entrée–is so much more important than organic seasonal ingredients and complex demi-glaces and boutique farm animals that have been given their own studio apartments to run around in.
At Sam’s, you won’t have to worry about not liking something, because you already know everything. There are no surprises on the appetizer list, which offers pub favorites like calamari ($7.99), spinach and artichoke dip ($6.99), and fresh steamed clams ($11.99, and satisfyingly tender and subtle, aided only by court-bouillon broth and a bright confetti of parsley and julienned carrot slivers). Entrée flavors are kept safe and simple–generous balls of herb butter, lemon-butter sauce or parsley-butter sauce, and salt and pepper make up most of the menu’s Department of Seasoning; the most complicated sauce you’ll find is the three-chili ketchup that accompanies a basket of fries ($3.99) and Master Class Onion Rings ($4.99).
Burgers and sandwiches are solid stacks of tradition. And the list of seafood options (such as salmon, halibut, scallops, and prawns, $15.99-$17.99) is a reassuring read, nothing anxiety-provoking for kids or grandparents. This reassurance is Sam’s foundation–even the menu is an exercise in sunny earnestness: “We specialize in steaks, but to be honest with you, we think all our food is pretty special”; or “We like [the salmon burger] grilled with lemon, herbs, and sea salt, but if you want it with any of the burger accompaniments above, we’re happy to make it your way.” This is a kitchen with no ego–just a sturdy sense of accommodation. There’s even a steak “Done-ness Guide”: medium = “deep pink, hot center,” and so on.
Gay Husband and I both indulged in flawlessly fired medium-rare steaks, happy with the texture, flavor (a nice basic salty crust with a clean, slight trace of the grill), and cut of our corn-fed, locker-aged beef. GH fell silent after a few bites of rib eye ($19.99), nodding with approval. The rib eye’s meat-to-fat ratio was excellent, and the delicious bits of fat melted in our mouths. I love a good, marbled T-Bone ($23.99), but stayed true to my hotel-buffet roots and ordered the Surf & Turf ($24.99)–a four-ounce Maine lobster tail and a six-ounce filet mignon that will deeply fulfill the land-and-sea carnivore in you. The lobster tail was a bit overcooked, but still succulent with a squirt of lemon; and the filet was juicy and agreeable, and perfect with creamy mashed potatoes that had thankfully not been heavily salted, a common steakhouse mistake.
But the best part–and I know this sounds dumb–was my accompanying wedge of cold, crisp, clean iceberg lettuce, draped with blue cheese and sprinkled with tomato and cucumber bits. No frisée, no jicama, no attitude–just good, solid sense.
Sam’s Steakhouse
2947 Eastlake Ave E, 957-7777. Dinner nightly 4-10 pm (Fri-Sat 4-11 pm).