This will get an eye roll from the general population, but in this town, it's gotta be said: Fake nonmonogamists and unicorn hunters, I'm sick of you! FTLOG, being nonmonogamous until you find "the one" isn't nonmonogamy. It's called casual dating. If you and your partner are "emotionally monogamous, physically open," you're not nonmonogamous, you're delusional swinging. Monogamy isn't a bad thing, nor is finding a third, but stop entering our relationships and communities under the guise of an identity just to benefit from our minds and bodies.

I get it. We can tell you what we want in and out of bed in a way that, often, our cis/straight/monogamous/vanilla counterparts can't, and we probably own more sex toys. Nonomonogamous and poly people fuck up too, but for our lives to work the way we want them to, we have to at least attempt to be practiced in, and more intentional about, communication, clearer about consent, and more transparent in our wants and needs than the baseline standards of vanilla society.

You're excited to sign a contract that will legally make it 10 times harder for someone to leave you regardless of your shitty communication and behavior (and likely non-consensual nonmonogamy) while we're specifically opting out of any of that shit and giving ourselves the right to pursue relationships and pleasure on our own terms. So please fuck off and be honest with yourself and your dates about who you are and what you want, and stop being a waste of our time and emotions. THANKS!


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