I didn’t mean to steal, truly. I stopped by a new downtown bagel shop this past weekend, elated to have a Sunday option for coffee, etc., as many coffee shops are closed on weekends in the CBD. The very friendly and helpful young lady at the window took my order—two bagels, a cold brew, and a tub of scallion schmear—then I stood to the side and waited.
She called my name, I grabbed the paper bag—which I assumed only contained the bagels—my coffee, and the rather large tub of the schmear next to the bag, and then I walked home. I kept thinking, "Wow, that’s a really big tub of schmear!" I didn't see any scallions in the schmear, but I wasn’t wearing my glasses, so I figured I just couldn’t see them.
I got home and was unloading my bagels only to find a small container of schmear INSIDE the bag! I put on my glasses and was mortified to discover that the quart-sized plastic tub I brought home was actually a tub of sugar with a hole in the top that was on the counter for customers to use in their coffee! At this point, I was simply too embarrassed to take it back.
I’ve been feeling guilty about this since it happened. I sincerely hope that if that sweet young lady working the window saw me do it, that she laughed it off as the actions of a silly, blind(ish), middle-aged man and not those of a not-so-stealthy condiment thief.
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