Sat Aug 6


Pirate-Free Olympia

With the Blue Angels terrorizing the skies, Seafair's closing weekend leaves only one option for any correct-thinking Seattleite: get as far away from it all as humanly fucking possible. And so we take a road trip to Olympia for a houseboat-building party—except that the partygoers/carpenters before us were a little too efficient. When we arrive, we're greeted in the front yard by our hosts (a cute couple who, for today, are going by the names Grix Clockigar and Kallandra the Warrior Maid) and a roofless, but otherwise complete, houseboat. The guests have gone home, the backyard barbecue is already cold, a considerable amount of beer has been consumed, and the plans to have a band perform inside the boat have fallen apart at the last minute.

The residential vessel, constructed using plans from a book called Handmade Houseboats, looks small but sturdy. Kallandra cheerfully notes that, with its bright blue paint job, the craft kind of resembles a "Smurf house." The actual construction of their new home took about four hours—reportedly a jovial sort of Northwesty barn raising in which "nobody lost any fingers." Next week the couple will sail northward to dock their new home in Ballard, but for now they need help putting a roof on the sucker. Digging this whole Very Special Episode vibe, Party Crasher offers our services, and luckily our Plus One proves to be a steady hand with a putty knife. With some Hank Williams spirituals on the boom box and cold beer and watermelon to fuel us, the rafters are up in no time. recommended

Want The Stranger to perform light construction work at your house party? E-mail the date, place, time, and party details to partycrasher@thestranger.com.