Ugh. The wretched bleak bleakness of post-Valentine's mid-February! So suicide inducing, it's true. However! If you were somehow laboring under the impression that this week was going to be as cold and dead as the cement-truck-oatmeal-corpse sky... well, you've been laboring FALSELY, Buster Brown. (You fool!) This busy week of almost too much fabulous begins with one Juanita More, appearing live at Lip Service! (Just dropped your martini? I understand.) The specs: Juanita is from San Francisco (where else?), where she is indeed something of a drag legend. She has recently dazzled we silly Seattle 'mos with select appearances. Tonight, she blazes forth once again to spin, perform a bit, and thrill our brains with her "shockingly stylish fashion assaults." She'll be accompanied by DJs Nark and Amoania—and rock 'n' roll super photographer Angel Ceballos will even take your damn picture! Brace yourself. Baltic Room, 9 pm, $5/free before 11 pm, 21+.
Not long ago, the very sexy and pretty darn gay band Noddy confided in me that they had secretly agreed to break up. Well. A pack of filthy damn LIES! All of it! And we know this now because they are so NOT broken up (not even a little!). In fact, they are playing tonight, which is heart-explodingly fantastic in three ways: (a) It's at Pony, so there's no cover, (b) Secret Shoppers are performing, too, and (c) THEY ARE GREAT BIG LYING FUCKING LIARS WHO DIDN'T BREAK UP! I fucking love great big lying fucking liars who didn't break up. Pony, 9 pm, free, 21+.
EARTH GIRLS, TOO EASY!
I flipping loathe Jim Carrey. I refuse to elaborate! But one of the greatest schadenfreudey moments I can imagine is seeing him covered in Day-Glo-crayon- colored fuzz, bleeping and blooping and trying to out-horny Jeff Goldblum and Damon Wayans all over Geena Davis in Earth Girls Are Easy, the überkitschy Space-Invaders-meets-1980s-mall-culture clusterfuck. (Plus, Julie Brown sings a stupid song about blondes!) Glorious. Central Cinema, 7 pm, $8 adv/$10 DOS, all ages.