[The following post may be construed as womansplaining, but do know that I was spurred to write it after being convinced to by my boyfriend. If you so wish, though, deduct points from this post due to my gender.]
Jezebel's list of "The 150 Worst Albums Made by Men" contains many truly cringe-worthy entries, but it seems like a missed opportunity to expose the public to even more terrible and incompetent male musicians. Jezebel's list strikes me as a corrective toward many media outlets' blind promotion and uncritical exaltation of male cultural creativity.
But my main problem with the “150 Worst Albums by Men” list is that there is not enough space to list all of the painfully bad albums made by male musicians over the years.
That being said, Jezebel's list possesses several heinous classics with which I agree 100 percent: Michael Bolton’s Soul Provider, Korn’s self-titled debut, Maroon 5’s Hands All Over, Sting’s Ten Summoner’s Tales, Toby Keith’s Shock’n Y’all, Jack Johnson’s In Between Dreams, Nickelback’s Silver Side Up, Guns N Roses’ Chinese Democracy, Bon Iver’s For Emma, Forever Ago, Lou Reed & Metallica’s Lulu, and of course, the number one worst album made by a man of all time, our future Senator Kid Rock’s Rock N Roll Jesus.
Perhaps it wasn't on Jezebel's agenda to go that deep into the astounding industry sexism that qualifies male musicians to make truly mediocre music and score record deals despite an obvious lack of talent.
With that concept in mind, I would like to present another 100 terrible albums made by men that I think deserve substantial mocking and in good time, truly absurd status (in no particular order).
(Fellow cis-het female Anna Kaplan also contributed to this list.)
Amber's Picks:
Hootie and the Blowfish, Cracked Rear View
Spin Doctors, Pocket Full of Kryptonite
G Love and the Special Sauce, Philadelphonic
Slipknot, Slipknot
System of a Down, Toxicity
Lenny Kravitz, It Is Time for a Love Revolution
Incubus, Fungus Amongus
Coldplay, Parachutes
Scott Weiland, The Most Wonderful Time of The Year
Van Halen, III
The Doors, Other Voices
Emerson, Lake and Palmer, Love Beach
Billy Idol, Cyberpunk
Snoop Dogg, Doggumentary
Chingy, Hoodstar
The Raconteurs, Consolers of the Lonely
Pretty Ricky, Late Night Special
Rush, Rush in Rio
Puscifer, "V" Is for Vagina
Swedish House Mafia, Until One
Clay Aiken, Measure of a Man
New Kids on The Block, Hangin’ Tough
Ben Folds, Rockin' the Suburbs
Blues Traveler, Cover Yourself
Michael Buble, BaBalu
Rod Stewart, Blondes Have More Fun
Bo Bice, The Real Thing
Smash Mouth, Astro Lounge
Offspring, The Offspring
Sugar Ray, Music for Cougars
Everclear, Sparkle and Fade
Marcy Playground, Marcy Playground
Gin Blossoms, No Chocolate Cake
Fuel, Sunburn
Silver Chair, Neon Ballroom
Blink 182, Enema of the State
Fallout Boy, Take This to Your Grave
Gerard Way, Hesitant Alien
Backstreet Boys, Millennium
Aaron Carter, Aaron Carter
Red Hot Chili Peppers, Californication
Widespread Panic, Street Dogs
The String Cheese Incident, A String Cheese Incident
Anna's Picks:
Nickelback, All the Right Reasons
Chris Brown, F.A.M.E.
R Kelly, Chocolate Factory
Justin Bieber, Journals
Skrillex, Recess
The Black Keys, Turn Blue
Kodak Black, Project Baby
LCD Soundsystem, Sound of Silver
Sean Kingston, Sean Kingston
MGMT, Congratulations
Meek Mill, First Come First Serve
My Morning Jacket, Z
The Flaming Lips, Embryonic
Incubus, If Not Now, When?
Zedd, Clarity
Marshmello, Joytime
Beck, Morning Phase
The Fray, How to Save a Life
OneRepublic, Native
The Script, Science & Faith
Jason Derulo, Reloaded
Jimmy Eat World, Chase This Light
Cake, Pressure Chief
Modest Mouse, Sad Sappy Sucker
Counting Crows, Echoes of the Outlaw Roadshow
The Black Crowes, Croweology
The Shins, Chutes Too Narrow
Interpol, Our Love to Admire
Thirty Seconds to Mars, A Beautiful Lie
Angels & Airwaves, I-Empire
Everclear, Welcome to the Drama Club
Goo Goo Dolls, A Boy Named Goo
Collective Soul, Disciplined Breakdown
Green Day, 21st Century Breakdown
Bowling for Soup, A Hangover You Don’t Deserve
The All American Rejects, Move Along
My Chemical Romance, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge
The Neighbourhood, Wiped Out!
The 1975, I like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it
Bright Eyes, The People’s Key
Say Anything, Anarchy, My Dear
Pitbull, Globalization
LMFAO, Sorry For Party Rocking
