"Your Car Is Blessed"/Downtown/Wed July 12/Time Unclear: Today, Officer Hall and Officer Park were sent downtown to "investigate a man covered in blood." When they arrived at the scene of the transgression, they found the gory subject and asked him what had happened. The man told them that it was not blood, but cranberry-sauce he was using to "absorb the sun." "Officer," the cranberry-sauce man said as he was led by Officer Hall to a squad car for more questioning, "don't do this, for your own safety. If you take me away these people will see that. It will all go down at midnight if I'm not here. These people love me." Concerned about the nature of this warning/threat, Officer Hall called another unit for help. Officer McLaughlin responded to the call, providing Hall and Park extra police muscle. After mumbling something about locusts and scorpions, the cranberry- sauce man placed his hands on the hood of Officer Hall's car and left two messy cranberry handprints on it. "Your car is blessed!" the cranberry sauce man declared with pride. The exasperated officers took him to Harborview for an involuntary psychological evaluation. He was released from the hospital a short time later.

Beware of the Locusts/Downtown/Thurs July 13/Time Unclear: Today, Officer Hall was patrolling downtown when he spotted the cranberry-sauce man again, except this time he was not covered in fake blood, but dressed in a normal fashion. When the cranberry-sauce man noticed Officer Hall, he raised his clean hands toward the patrol car and said, "Blessings! Are you still watching out for locusts and scorpions?" Later, when Officer McLaughlin was patrolling the streets of Seattle, he came across the cranberry-sauce man and immediately made contact with him. "Oh, I remember you," the cranberry-sauce man said, and then spoke into the lapel of his jacket as if he were an FBI agent. "We know who are," the now FBI agent said when he finished his secret communications. At dusk, other officers took the FBI agent to Harborview for an involuntary psychological evaluation, after which he was taken to the precinct where he muttered something about "locusts and scorpions" from his holding cell. He was released a short time later.

"I Know I'm Crazy!"/Downtown/Fri July 14/ 11:58 am: Today, a witness called 911 and reported that a man who'd flipped off a Metro bus driver had walked into a Sam Goody store with a machine gun. The man wore a large beanie-type hat and dark T-shirt, and had a black machine gun slung around his neck. Officers responded to the call, including Officer McLaughlin, who drew his gun, approached the suspect (who turned out to be the FBI agent) and took him into custody. When Officer McLaughlin inspected the "machine gun," he realized it was made of cloth, foam rubber, and plastic. "I'm the angel of God, the angel of death," the FBI agent said as McLaughlin marveled at the homemade weapon. "I know I'm crazy," he finally confessed to Officer McLaughlin in a moment of lucidity. "I take Paxil. But it doesn't help much. That's why I keep doing these kinds of things. [But] everyone is angry [at me]. Look at how they're looking at me. They are going to riot!" Later, Officer McLaughlin admitted that if the suspect had reached for his fake machine gun, he would have blasted him to kingdom come.

While in the holding cell at the West Precinct that night, the angel of God and death activated a call button. Officer Hall answered, and the angel of God and death told him: "Tell [Officer McLaughlin] I forgive him. Imagine if I had been shot today--it would have all gone down. Tell him I forgive him, for real. If he had shot me I would have come back as a ghost to protect you guys, because we need you." Hall requested that the man be sent to Harborview for more than just an involuntary psychological evaluation.