You have been waiting your entire life in Seattle for this. Seriously. Even if you didn't know you were waiting for something, you were waiting. You were waiting in traffic. You were waiting for a bus that never came. You were waiting for a cab or an Uber or a Lyft while wishing there was a cheaper option. You were waiting for the University Bridge to go up and down, or for the Montlake Bridge to go up and down, and you were asking yourself: Why, in a major city like Seattle, isn't there a faster way to get from the north side of the city to the south side?

Now that way is here. Saturday is "launch day" for light rail service extending from downtown to Capitol Hill and the University District. There will be huge daylong parties at both stations—DJs, bands, food trucks, free bike tune-ups—celebrating the fact that you're about to be able to get from Dick's Drive-In to Husky Stadium, or Husky Stadium to Dick's Drive-In, in FOUR FUCKING MINUTES, through a subway-like tunnel, at a cost of $2.25. Beat that in a car, suckas!

This new extension of our regional light rail system is paid for with your tax dollars! (Or, okay, maybe mostly with someone else's tax dollars—but hooray for that, too!) If you have ever voted for a light rail funding measure in Washington State, pat yourself on the back. And then, because this is a huge fucking celebration, reach around and do something even more exciting. (In the privacy of your own home, pervert. Definitely not on light rail.)

Then, once you're done with your personal congratulations DAN SAVAGE can explain how this new light rail route is going to warp space and time by expanding Capitol Hill and shrinking Seattle. After that, CHARLES MUDEDE tells you how to qualify for a reduced-fare ORCA card and reminds you that buses are still better than trains for some things.

Oh, and did you know that light rail expansion means an expansion of affordable housing in Seattle? It does, and SYDNEY BROWNSTONE tells you why. (While also showing you how much Bertha sucks compared to its light-rail-tunneling competition.)

Have a bike? You can bring it on light rail, but maybe think for a second about jamming your cargo bike onto a train, says ANSEL HERZ. Registered to vote? Your work on behalf of light rail is not done, writes HEIDI GROOVER. This November, we'll be voting on another light rail expansion, and you need to get up to speed on it now.

In other urgent matters: What's the best neighborhood accessible by light rail to buy weed? TOBIAS COUGHLIN-BOGUE is glad you asked. What's it like to watch the new Capitol Hill station being built from your living-room window? CHRISTOPHER FRIZZELLE tells all.

Wanna buy a slightly used mom-car? Now that light rail is expanding, RICH SMITH has one for you.

Wanna know why busking is still a bad idea, even with our shiny new light rail extension? Also, do you wanna see an actual movie in an actual movie theater via light rail, while thinking about movies that feature light rail? SEAN NELSON is here to help.

And do you know what the greatest thing is about expanded light rail in Seattle? Don't worry, ANGELA GARBES does, and it's this: More people can now get to the Othello Station in South Seattle, where there's an amazing array of East African, Vietnamese, and Mexican restaurants that you must eat at soon.

Finally, what ever happened to Dick Falkenbury, devoted monorail friend and committed light rail enemy? ANA SOFIA KNAUF found him, and—surprise—he's still pissed about losing the fight of his life!