I just cant wait to floooooop.
"I just can't wait to be a floooooop." Disney

Tropical Storm Barry could wreck the Big Easy: Which is already underwater due to an abnormally high Mississippi River. “There are three ways that Louisiana can flood: storm surge, high rivers, and rain,” said Louisiana's governer at a recent press conference. “We’re going to have all three.” Many parts of the city have been flooded for days, including neighborhoods that are on higher ground, like Uptown and the French Quarter. Barry is expected to make landfall as a Category 1 hurricane late Friday or early Saturday. The National Weather Service is calling it an unprecedented problem for New Orleans. This is what it looked like yesterday:

Trump held a "Presidential Social Media Summit" today: Oh boy. This summit, which was not attended by any representatives from actual social media platforms, was held between Trump and his "friends" and social media supporters. A Guardian reporter described it “as a platform for rightwing conspiracy theorists, bigots and the professionally aggrieved.” Trump used the summit as an opportunity to yell at the media and brag about how good he is at Twitter. If you want to feel gross, here's the full livestream.

This ice cream thing is OUT OF HAND: For being so tough, Texans are really scared of some rogue tongues.

You can't refuse to hire people because they're obese: I thought this was obvious, but now it's LAW. Today the Washington state Supreme Court ruled that obesity is covered by the Washington Law Against Discrimination. “I hope this ruling will lead to a sea change in the way that courts think about obesity and disability law,” said an attorney associated with the case.

No executives at Boeing have been fired yet over the 737 Max drama: But now Eric Lindblad, the Boeing vice president in charge of the 737 Max assembly plant in Renton, is retiring, reports the Seattle Times. He's been in charge of the plant for less than a year. He said he's been planning on retiring since last summer. Definitely not related to the 737 Max!! Why would you even think that?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Goodbye Glossier: We hardly knew you. The trendy lip gloss-selling "experience" store has left Capitol Hill. I will miss its misty windows and rolling greenery. The building, across from the Capitol Hill light rail station and the gravesite of one of the last American Apparel stores, will likely remain vacant for a while, writes Capitol Hill Seattle Blog.

Kamala Harris wants to test America's 225,000 untested rape kits: She's the first 2020 presidential contender to say she'll commit to spending money—$1 billion!—to help clear states' rape kit backlogs. "As California's Attorney General, I committed resources and attention to clearing a backlog of 1,300 untested rape kits at state-run labs, and we got it done within my first year in office," Harris said in a statement. "We need the same focus at the national level to pursue justice and help hold predators accountable."

Buttigieg's got plans, too: The South Bend mayor, whose full name I just discovered is Peter Paul Montgomery Buttigieg, released an ambitious "Douglass Plan" today. Here are the details, from NPR:

His “Douglass Plan” aims to establish a $10 billion fund for black entrepreneurs over five years, invest $25 billion in historically black colleges, legalize marijuana, expunge past drug convictions, reduce the prison population by half and pass a new Voting Rights Act to further empower the federal government to ensure voting access.

His campaign says it is equal in scale to the Marshall Plan, which used the equivalent of approximately $100 billion at current value to rebuild Europe after World War II. Buttigieg says the program would be enacted alongside potential direct reparations for slavery, not in place of it.

The bagel dude got interviewed today by Inside Edition: I bet you this media attention will get him dates. I give it two months til he's getting married in People magazine.

Trump is abandoning his attempt to add a citizenship question to the 2020 census: Earlier in the day, Trump threatened to issue an executive order that would mandate that the question be added to the census. Legal experts said this move wouldn't hold up in court. By the afternoon, Attorney General William Barr and Trump announced that the question will not be asked on the census. That said, Trump also announced he will order federal agencies to give the Commerce Department all the records they have that are related to non-citizens living in the country, reports CNBC.

This could've been us, Washington: But you didn't want to approve a new Wildfire Prevention and Suppression Account. Maybe next year.

The Beacon Cinema is almost open: They got a sign! The new Beacon Hill cinema is offering free film screenings for its first week in business, July 19-25.

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One step closer... we've got a sign!

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The reviews for the new Lion King are coming in: And they aren't great. You gotta read this review from IndieWire: "This soulless chimera of a film comes off as little more than a glorified tech demo from a greedy conglomerate—a well-rendered but creatively bankrupt self-portrait of a movie studio eating its own tail." Damn.

This is sad: Damn².

Get 'em, France: Today, France passed a 3% digital tax on the French revenues generated by around 30 U.S. companies that provide digital services to French users. The companies hit by the tax include Google, Amazon, and Facebook. The tax applies to companies with total annual revenues of $845 million worldwide and $28 million in France, reports U.S. News.

Chile no longer has a statute of limitations on child sex abuse crimes: Over 200 victims have come forward in a sex abuse crisis in Chile's Catholic Church. Because of this ongoing scandal, Chilean President Sebastian Pinera signed into law a bill to remove the statute of limitations on sex crimes. “Beginning today, the passing of time will never more be an accomplice to those who abuse our children, nor an ally of impunity,” Pinera said today.

Who do you think was more stoned: That My Little Pony or the person who made this cake?