Good Morning! It keeps being shiny outside. It’ll be a little warmer today than yesterday, squarely in the mid-60s. It’s supposed to be this beautiful all week, but spring is fickle, and she can take it away at any moment. Enjoy it while you can.

Alright, let’s dive into the news.

The Wealth Tax Makes a Comeback: But just a little one, as a treat. The state legislature has until Sunday to come up with a budget that balances our multi-billion dollar shortfall without giving Governor Ferguson the scaries. Ferg has refused to sign a budget that has a full and proper wealth tax, but he’s said he’s willing to do a “test,” and Dems are taking him up on it: a $100 million tax (rather than $4 billion) to see if it can hold up to a legal challenge. It’s not the wealth tax we deserve, but it’d be a start. There’s already a $1.5 million campaign from T-Mobile, Costco, Alaska Airlines, and Microsoft to fight new progressive tax structures, so it’s not unreasonable to think a challenge is coming. But this is a chance to prove that it can hold up.

RFK Won’t Say Gay: Speaking of budgets, this is one I’d like to personally kick in the dick. According to a leaked HHS budget draft, the department plans to get rid of services for LGBTQ youth who call 988, the national suicide and crisis hotline. LGBTQ youth are four times more likely to attempt suicide, and right now, the hotline has counselors who are trained to work with queer kids: understanding the stress caused by recent political attacks, the importance of using appropriate pronouns, and the ways in which the youth often face lack of family support and harassment. The queer youth-specific counselors have received 1.3 million calls, texts, or chats since the program launched in 2022, and in February, they received an average of 2,100 contacts per day. The budget isn’t a sure thing: the change would have to be approved by Congress, but if it were, it’d go into effect in October. Remember when the Trump administration said it wanted more babies? Let this be a reminder that they only want to fill America with cis, straight, white babies.

Yesterday was Special Election night, and the (early) results are in. The King County AFIS levy, which renewed funding for our regional fingerprint and palmprint database, has about 60 percent of the vote this morning and looks like it’s going to pass. Why are we worried? There aren’t enough guardrails to keep that information from getting to the Feds—and specifically to immigration enforcement.

Get Your Hand Shaven Noodles While You Can: Shanghai Garden announced that it’s closing at the end of the month. The family-run spot has been in the CID since 1990, and their hand-shaven barleygreen noodles have been a staple comfort food for generations of Seattleites. (The chew! How do they get that chew??) According to Bethany Jean Clement at the Seattle Times, they’re telling a familiar story: prices are up, and business never really recovered after the pandemic. Go show them some love before they close.

Buckling Bridge: Put those on the list of words I never want to hear together. According to SDOT, the Carbon River Bridge is “permanently closed” to all traffic—cutting off Highway 165 to the northwest of Mount Rainier National Park—because its 103-year-old support beams are buckling. If you’re annoyed that getting to Rainier will be tougher this season, I get it. But take a look at these photos of the beams. That is not how you want to die.

BREAKING NEWS: Oreo has announced its newest flavor, and honestly, we’re intrigued.

 

 

An Earth Day Surprise: The day before Earth Day, the EPA informed more than 450 employees working on environmental justice and DEI that they will either be fired or reassigned. “This is the first step in a broader effort to ensure that EPA is best positioned to meet its core mission of protecting human health and the environment and Powering the Great American Comeback,” the agency wrote. “It’s a gut punch but long expected,” one employee told the Washington Post. “Announcing a [reduction in force] of the EJ program on the eve of Earth Day is sick and shows exactly who they are.”

Meanwhile, a research team from Dartmouth College estimated that the world’s biggest corporations have caused $28 trillion in climate damage, which, for comparison, is a smidge less than the value of all goods and services that the US produced last year. Unsurprisingly, more than half that figure comes from 10 fossil fuel companies: Saudi Aramco, Gazprom, Chevron, ExxonMobil, BP, Shell, National Iranian Oil Co., Pemex, Coal India, and the British Coal Corporation. The study could make it easier to hold these companies accountable for their actions, like the tobacco companies have been. Let’s start revving up those lawsuits.

Witch Hunt: Remember how creepy the White House was on Easter? With the laying-on hands and the giant Easter Bunny? Trump’s still leaning in on the Devout Christian Performance. The VA has now directed employees to report any incidents that they perceive as “hostile to Christian views.” The move is aimed at aligning with the Trump administration's executive order to "end the anti-Christian weaponization of government," according to an internal email. They even made a very special email address for it: Anti-ChristianBiasReporting@va.gov. Obviously, any personal religious practice is already protected by the First Amendment. This is just making sure we all know which religion they care about.

Durbin Stepping Down: Illinois Senator Dick Durbin announced that he wouldn’t be running for a fifth term next year, putting more pressure on the party to get its act together when it was already looking like a difficult path to reclaiming a majority. “I truly love the job of being a United States senator,” said the 80-year-old. “But in my heart I know it’s time to pass the torch.” It’s time for some new blood!

Wildfire in New Jersey: So far, more than 18 square miles have burned in the Jersey Pine Barrens, and it’s expected to burn for days before it’s contained.The AP reports that wildfires are actually common in the area (we see you, East Coast). Importantly, the fire is near an alpaca farm, and the owners report that all of the animals are safe.

As a Wednesday Treat: Lorde announced that she would be performing a surprise show in NYC’s Washington Square Park at 7pm, and people showed the fuck up. Because we all need this. So here’s some of the show.