We’re in week three of the US-Israel war in Iran, and we’re deploying 2,500 additional Marines into the Middle East. As of this weekend, more than 2,100 people have been killed since the start of the war, including 13 Americans and at least 1,348 civilians. None of Trump’s options are good at this point: Continue the war, and energy prices will keep rising while escalating the death count and continuing to piss off his base. End the war, and he’d have to sacrifice most of his supposed goals for the conflict, and leave a very angry theocracy in power. Meanwhile, the Strait of Hormuz is basically shut down, and Trump has taken to social media to beg other world powers to secure it, a true sign of stable leadership.  

“Killer Jab”: Anti-Science HHS Secretary and well-known worm food Robert F. Kennedy has quieted down a bit on his anti-vax beliefs, but the New York Times obtained a confidential report from a federal work group recommending that the feds make sweeping changes to how they track vaccine injuries from the COVID vaccine. The opening paragraph says that public “sentiment” around the vaccine has shifted, pointing to a survey that found that about 1 in 4 people said they knew someone who’d died from the vaccine. Dr. Sean O’Leary from the American Academy of Pediatrics told NYT that the report cherry-picks shitty studies that support its thesis and omits work that does not. “It is straight out of the anti-vaccine handbook.”

Speaking of Kennedys: The board of the Kennedy Center for the Arts will vote on Trump’s plan to close it for renovations this summer. We know this because Rep. Joyce Beatty, a Dem from Ohio, sued over her right to participate in the meeting as an ex officio member of the board and formally register her dissent for the closure. “There is absolutely no basis to shutter this precious living memorial and beloved institution,” Beatty said in a statement. “It certainly looks like President Trump is shutting down the center because he is embarrassed that ticket sales are down and artists are fleeing since his illegal renaming.”

And the Winner Is…: One Battle After Another, which took home six Oscars last night, including Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Adapted Screenplay. (As the Cut reported, it was a great night to be Maya Rudolph’s plus-one.) Autumn Durald Arkapaw became the first woman to win the Oscar for Best Cinematography for Sinners. Michael B. Jordan got Best Actor for his lead role in Sinners, and Jessie Buckley got Best Actress for Hamnet. Sean Penn won for Best Supporting Actor, but he was hanging out in a warzone for some reason. And the KPop Demon Hunters song “Golden” became the first K-pop song to win an Oscar. 

Also This Happened:

All Tied Up: For the first time in 14 years, the Oscars had a tie. “I’m not joking. It’s actually a tie,” Kumail Nanjiani said when he opened the envelope for Best Live-Action Short. “So everyone calm down. We’re gonna get through this. Focus up.” The directors of both films got to have their moment on the stage: Sam A. Davis and Jack Piatt for The Singers, and Alexandre Singh and Natalie Musteata for Two People Exchanging Saliva (which, surprisingly, is not a HUMP! film). “I just want to say congratulations to both winners,” Conan O’Brien said. “You just ruined 22 million Oscar pools.” According to the Hollywood Reporter, the last Oscar tie was in 2012 for sound editing, and before that, in 1995, again for live-action shorts. 

Some More Pop Culture News: Deadline reported that the Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot is officially canned, for now. Hulu couldn’t get on board with the pilot, which was directed by Oscar-nominated director Chloé Zhao, but “plans to regroup and mull a possible new incarnation of the beloved franchise.” If you’re still really craving an early 2000s reboot, this might take the edge off: an animated reboot of Firefly is in the works. 

Speaking of the Aughts: After spending a couple years touring on the nostalgia of Transatlanticism and Plans, Death Cab for Cutie announced I Built You a Tower this morning. It’s the first studio album since 2022’s Asphalt Meadows. They also released “Riptides,” the album’s first single.

Renee Erikson Is Back on the Hill: With her new restaurant in the old Bateau space, called Jeffrey’s. But according to Capitol Hill Seattle Blog, the employee union (United Creatures of the Sea) for the restaurant group (Eat Sea Creatures) is still fighting for a fair contract. According to management, at least, “Jeffrey’s remains a unionized workplace.” The union is less confident. “Until we sign contracts, we’re never going to know whether or not any of those [conversations] are legitimate,” a union member told the blog.

Weather: Wet. On the radar map, there’s just a giant green blob over Western Washington. 

Super Sonic Dreams: The NBA board plans to hold a vote next week to explore adding expansion teams to Seattle and Las Vegas. If the board of governors approves it, that’s just step one. This vote would allow the league to start a bidding process for the teams, but there would still be a final vote later in the year. In both votes, 23 of the 30 governors would have to vote in favor. ESPN says there’s “momentum” in the board of governors, though. If it does happen, we could have an NBA team for the 2028-2029 season.  

Team USA Hockey Makes a Historic Clean Sweep: It’s an Olympic Hat Trick! All three US Hockey teams—mens, womens, and the Paralympic team—took home the gold this year. It was the Paralympic team’s fifth straight win. 

Co-Pilot Benched: Last month, Mayor Katie Wilson paused a citywide rollout of Co-Pilot, Microsoft’s AI tool, for city workers. The rollout had been planned before she was elected, in part as an efficiency tool, and in part because, apparently, government workers are all using AI anyway, and the Harrell admin figured offering an approved program could help regulate it better. The Wilson administration told the Seattle Times that they paused the program so they could better understand the implications of widespread use of CoPilot by city employees, and that there’s no timeline for if and when the program will be used. 

If you’re not sure how you feel about AI these days, let me help. 404 Media talked to the Kenyan workers who spend 8 hours a day training AI. “Every day, Michael Geoffrey Asia spent eight consecutive hours at his laptop in Kenya staring at porn, annotating what was happening in every frame for an AI data labeling company. When he was done with his shift, he started his second job as the human labor behind AI sex bots, sexting with real lonely people he suspected were in the United States. His boss was an algorithm that told him to flit in and out of different personas.” Cool future you got there, guys. 

Hannah is The Stranger's Editor-in-Chief.