I have a hairy hole. I'm a bottom that loves to be rimmed, but my butthole is so hairy. I love having a smooth pubic area and love having a smooth anus too, but the only way I've ever gotten rid of the hair around my anus is to shave it which is tedious. A couple of questions:

1. What is the best way to get rid of the hair down there? Are depilatories such as Nair safe to use down there?; and

2. Does the hair around the anus provide a purpose? Though I love the look and feel of a completely smooth rim, I don't know if that hair serves a purpose.

Homo Obviously Likes Entry Smooth

"Shithole" will be trending for the next ten years thanks to President Shithole, HOLES, but I'm happy to pivot to a different and far more welcoming shithole: yours!

So... you like to present a smooth pubic area and anus but don't like the tedious process of removing all that hair? Have someone else do it for you, HOLES. That person could be an actual, professional waxer (which is the easiest, simplest, eye-watering-iest solution) or it could be person who's going to be doing the rimming. There are also people out there — look for them online — who enjoy shaving for shaving's sake because shaving's their kink. You could work out a deal with someone who gets off on shaving bodies and shitholes: you let him shave your hole, he gets to have a wank when he's done.

That said, your hairy hole is hairy for a reason, HOLES. Humans used to be a whole lot hairier, but as we've evolved our bodies have left hair on the parts that need it. Hair down there — like the hair in our pits — helps circulate air (hairless asses are often swamp asses) and it can also capture sweat filled with proteins and pheromones that can attract (or repulse) partners. Shaving can also create irritation or leave nicks, which can increase the transmission of diseases and the risk of infection. I'm not being alarmist — shave if you want to
— but know that your ass hair has a purpose.

And regarding Nair: No, don't use it near your hole. It can lead to anal irritation and potential inflammation, even bleeding or lesions. The pain of a wax is quick and temporary — a Nair burn sticks around. (That said, some folks I know with hairless shitholes swear by this stuff.)

And finally, HOLES, and apropos of nothing... this song has been stuck in my head ever since I wrote the headline for this post...


Listen to my podcast, the Savage Lovecast, at

Impeach the motherfucker already! Get your ITMFA buttons, t-shirts, hats and lapel pins and coffee mugs at!

Tickets to HUMP 2018 are on sale now! Get them here!