Have you guys seen J50??
"Have you guys seen J50??" RIEGSECKER/GETTYIMAGES.COM

Where in the world is J50? The ailing orca is missing. The lead whale researcher on her pod says J50 is most likely dead. She had been emaciated and sick. The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration had just put together a plan to capture J50 to nurse her back to health in captivity.

Get a load of these goats: Listen. There are very few things I need to see in my life—the Aurora Borealis, a live screening of Jeopardy!—and now one of them is goats being airlifted from the Olympic Peninsula to the North Cascades. The process is happening now. Right now! About 700 goats will be relocated. The rest. Uh. Well. The rest will be killed. It’s do or die.

Efficiency at work:

Jeff Bezos finally has a philanthropy plan: Better late than never, that’s what I always say. Bezos’s “Day One Fund” will put $2 billion into charities that assist the homeless and early childhood education. He’s going to be backing Mary’s Place, the shelter that houses homeless families in Seattle. He’s also going to start his own private pre-schools. This is good. However, people do have some reservations. Namely, as GeekWire points out, education philanthropy isn’t so easy—the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation discovered this the hard way. Will the children just be glorified guinea pigs? No, Bezos says they'll be "the consumer." Additionally, and maybe a little conspiracy thoerist-y, are we all chill with Jeff molding an entire generation of young minds? Discuss.

Sue Bird flips Donald Trump the bird: If the Seattle Storm is invited to the White House after their WNBA win, Sue Bird says she will not be in attendance.

Hurricane season is here and the Weather Channel sure is prepared: Turns out Michael Bay has a stake in the nation’s weather. Not really, but look at these dope graphics. Also, if you’re near the hurricane heed her warning while enjoying the dope graphics.

Five places to go in Burien, Washington: Oh? You weren’t looking for the Burien hotspots? The New York Times just wrote an article highlighting some of Burien’s greatest hits. My top choice from the list is The Electric Train Store. Maybe I’ll see you there this weekend.

Fox News deserves to burn: Botham Jean, 26, was shot in his own apartment when a Dallas cop entered, assumed it was her own place, and mistook Jean for an intruder. Now, Fox News is doing what Fox News does best and being a racist sack of shit:

Why are 39 houses on fire in Massachusetts? It might be a gas line thing. Columbia Gas gas lines were in the process of being depressurized. It seems like this resulted in dozens of house fires and explosions. The city of Andover has told its residents to shut their gas off.

Budweiser and Coors are sending 500,000 cans of water to Hurricane Florence victims: No, not their beer. Actual water.