Someone call the fucking cops. Credit: ANDREYGUDKOV/Getty Images
Someone call the fucking cops.
Someone call the fucking cops. ANDREYGUDKOV/Getty Images

Bill Gates is all for that carbon fee: You should be too. C’mon, we all saw that devastating New York Times article about how the world is ending in 22 years. We’ve got to take action to save it. Bill Gates is all in; he wrote that he fully supports Initiative 1631 and will donate money to the Yes on 1631 campaign. Hell yeah, Bill. If the US isn’t going to be a part of the Paris Accords then Washington has to set a precedent.

School funding solution is a capital gains tax: That’s what Washington superintendent Chris Reykdal thinks. He unveiled his 2019-21 budget today. It includes funding for special needs students, more nurses, will fix recent funding disparities, and more. But that money—roughly $580 million—won’t just appear out of thin air. Reykdal pitched an 8 percent capital gains tax to fund the budget. It “would raise $1 billion annually, half which would replace and buy down the state property tax by 35 cents per $1,000 of assessed valuation,” reports KING5. About 53,000 households would be impacted by the tax.

Felony charges dropped against climate defenders: A District Court judge has acquitted two environmental activists of all charges. The two women, both from the Seattle area, participated in the “Shut It Down” climate action in 2016 where they, and others, turned off the valves of the five pipelines carrying Canadian tar sands crude oil. They were arrested on felony charges. Today, they were acquitted because, as the judge said, “the prosecution failed to demonstrate any evidence of damage to two Enbridge pipelines.”

Spokane man makes his house a hobbit hole: Well, it’s still a house. But this guy is the biggest Tolkien fan around. He’s made his home into something Bilbo Baggins would be proud of. He has a door knocker in the shape of a dragon that reminds him of Smaug, apparently. I would just like to point out that in the KING5 article about this they wrote that as “Smog” and not “Smaug.” Fake fans, I swear.

Check your travel times: Best of luck on the commute, folks.

Skagit County is testing out a needle pick-up program: There have been a lot of complaints in Skagit County about used needles lying around. The county is going to test a pilot program for needle pick up. Over six months, 100 kits, including gloves and safety glasses, will be dispensed to those who want to pick up some needles. If you’re one of those people go to this link.

I am living for Melania’s René Belloq cosplay: Raiders of the Lost Ark, anyone?

10 percent of all housing units in Seattle are only one room: Gene Balk, known at the Seattle Times as Gene Gene The Data Machine, reports that one-room living is on the rise in Seattle. It has seen an 80 percent uptick since the start of the decade. Studio apartments (450-500 feet) and smaller options like aPodments (less than 150 square feet) are on the rise. Why? People are forsaking space for location.

This is depressing: Also, not what I experienced in college. Maybe I was just friends with an abnormal amount of politically active kids, or UW is a whole lot different than UC Irvine. I doubt that, but maybe we should try this on a Seattle campus.

There’s apparently Olympic breakdancing in the youth Olympic Games: I didn’t even know there was a youth Olympics.

Hurricane Michael upgraded to Category 3 storm: It’s set to make landfall in the Florida Panhandle on Wednesday. It will also impact more of the southeast, a region that is still grappling from the effects of Florence.

A pointless, yet entertaining video for your viewing pleasure: It’s the evening. Who has the time to think? Don’t. Just watch instead. I also think watching this video qualifies as working out.

Greenpeace says Coke, Pepsi, and Nestle are the biggest producers of plastic: Coke-branded trash was found in 40 out of 42 countries where Greenpeace conducted plastic cleanups with the Break Free From Plastic Movement. The three companies pledged to make changes to their packaging by 2025.

Washington woman calls 9-1-1 on humpback whales: Three humpback whales swam under this family’s boat. The husband was in awe. The wife was horrified. You can hear her freaking out in the video and frantically calling the police.

Nathalie Graham covers anything she finds fun, weird, or interesting. You can find a lot of that in her column, Play Date. Her work has also appeared around town in The Seattle Times, GeekWire, and the...