Yknow, before he died, Paul said, Pass the pigskin to Jeff. Its his time.
"Y'know, before he died, Paul said, 'Pass the pigskin to Jeff. It's his time.'" ALEX WONG / GETTY

Should the Makah Tribe be allowed to hunt and kill whales? The Washington state tribe, the only American Indians with a treaty right to hunt whales, hasn't killed a whale in 20 years. They want to kill again. Animal rights activists call it barbaric. The tribe calls it a right and settled law.

WSDOT accidentally told drivers to evacuate the Highway 99 tunnel this morning: No one did. Apparently, the drivers did the right thing.

2 dead, 3 wounded in Santa Clarita school shooting: Another one. A student at Saugus High School took out a gun in the school's quad area and opened fire. It was the suspect's 16th birthday. He was found with a self-inflicted gun wound in the head and is now in "grave" condition.

We've evolved from "quid pro quo" to "bribery": Nancy Pelosi announced that yesterday's impeachment inquiry testimony was "devastating" and "corroborated evidence of bribery." The use of the word "bribery" is new, and many analysts suggested that "the bribery language, as opposed to 'quid pro quo,' reflects a pivot in messaging Democrats intend to deploy in order to make the allegations easier to understand."

The "blob" is shrinking: The marine heatwave fondly referred to as the "blob" has shrunk, but officials think this backing off may just be because of winter, reports Evan Bush at the Seattle Times. “If that’s the case, we could be in for a really big event next year,” a research scientist told the Times. There's other weird stuff going on. Two white croakers, for instance, were caught in Northwest waters recently. They're associated with warmer Californian water. Other fish, like yellowfin tuna, mahi mahi, and bluefin tuna, have also been showing up farther north. When asked what it means, a Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife director said: "We don’t know what it means. I don’t know what normal is anymore. I don’t know if there will be such a thing as normal." Yikes.

New Jersey demands Uber pay $649 million in unpaid employment taxes: The state wants an additional $119 million in interest. This is believed to be the first time that a local government has sought back payroll taxes from Uber, writes the New York Times, and the case could have a major impact on how states across the country view tech companies that rely on exploited labor the gig economy.

The flip phone is back: with a small twist. It's $1,500.

Koreans take their annual college entrance exams very, very seriously: Today in Seoul, flights were grounded so people could concentrate. Traffic was diverted to limit distractions. Students were escorted by police. Why? Because it's time for 1,185 schools to take the annual college entrance exams. I had no idea this was such a huge thing in Korea. America could never.

Amazon pushes back against Microsoft's $10 billion JEDI contract: To pretty much everyone's surprise, the Defense Department recently awarded Microsoft a massive cloud contract, called the Joint Enterprise Defense Infrastructure (JEDI) contract. It's a 10-year contract that essentially builds "the military’s war cloud," as GeekWire's Monica Nickelsburg put it. Now, Amazon is "protesting" the Defense Department's decision to give the JEDI contract to Microsoft, claiming they were influenced by Trump's hatred of Bezos.

Three Indiana judges walk into a White Castle: What happens next will surprise you.

I guess Bezos is listening to us when we say he needs to invest in Seattle: because he's reportedly interested in purchasing the fucking Seahawks. The NFL is also interested in the purchase, reports the Seattle Times. PAUL ALLEN HAS BEEN IN THE GRAVE FOR ONLY A YEAR, JEFF!!!

Support The Stranger

Updates on the Australian bushfires: The death toll has risen to at least four people. Police in South Wales are investigating at least seven "suspicious" fires. A 16-year-old was charged with arson today for starting a fire north of Brisbane that destroyed 14 homes. Fire chiefs are saying the worst of summer is "still ahead of us." Ah, remember summer?

Meanwhile: Rain. It's in the forecast.