Yes, thats, uh, poop.

Many states are exiting lockdowns too early: Doctors around the world are saying things like "We’re risking a backslide that will be intolerable,” and "There will be a second wave, but the problem is to which extent. Is it a small wave or a big wave? It’s too early to say." What do we do when this thing boomerangs?

There's a small but concerning number of "children with COVID-19 coming into emergency rooms in bad shape with a kind of inflammatory shock syndrome affecting multiple organs," reports the Washington Post. Doctors are working to figure out what's going on, but it underscores how little we still know about COVID-19.

That Washington Post article helps clear up some misconceptions about kids and COVID-19:

• "We have observed that children generally have more mild presentations than adults, despite having viral loads that are equal to or even higher than adults."

• One early theory about why children may be less reactive to COVID-19 centers on the idea that their immune systems are less mature and may not overreact as some adult systems do.

• “It is possible that the antibodies that children develop to fight off the disease lead to a lingering response that causes fever and inflammation."

We all need a little help with video and audio chatting: Someone flushed a toilet during the Supreme Court’s audio livestream.

Excuse me, what the fuck: Millions of Americans will refuse to get a coronavirus vaccine when it becomes available, polls find.

Ahmaud Arbery, 25, was shot dead in February in Georgia after two white men, a father and son, chased him down: Lawyers for Arbery's family released horrifying video from the shooting yesterday, where Arbery appears to be murdered while jogging. Arbery was unarmed. The shooter has not been arrested or charged. The investigation is ongoing. "We've now assigned this case to three of our experienced, supervisory-level agents," the Georgia Bureau of Investigation Director said today. "I'm confident we'll do justice in this matter." Rich writes more about Arbery in his daily poetry column here.

You probably don't care but Lady Gaga's next album, Chromatica, got another release date, after being postponed due to COVID-19. It will come out on May 29 and feature Elton John, Ariana Grande, and Blackpink.

Trump considers himself a wartime president: COVID-19 is the war. We are the warriors. From the LA Times:

Asked Wednesday if the nation needs to accept greater loss of life, Trump said “hopefully it won’t be the case, but it may very well be the case.”

“We have to be warriors,” he said from his seat behind the Resolute desk in the Oval Office. “We can’t keep our country closed down for years.”

The new language shows Trump appears to view people as “collateral damage to salvage the economy,” said Jeffrey Levi, a public health expert at George Washington University.

A coalition of online retailers, backed by Amazon, are beginning an epic ad blitz aimed at Republicans to encourage them to support the United States Postal Service. Details from the New York Times:

The coalition intends to spend more than $2 million on the campaign in an attempt to whip up Republican opposition to Mr. Trump’s idea, pressing lawmakers instead to support a multibillion-dollar rescue package proposed by Democrats that would help the Postal Service survive the sharp drop in revenue and mail volume caused by the pandemic.

The ads will begin running nationally Wednesday night on Fox News’s “Hannity”—one of Mr. Trump’s favorite programs—and on Rush Limbaugh’s radio show on Thursday. They do not mention the president, but label his proposal to jack up delivery prices by 400 percent “a massive package tax” on small businesses and Americans who rely on the mail for prescription drugs and other goods.

Washington's most recent update from its Department of Health lists 870 deaths and 15,905 confirmed cases of COVID-19 in Washington state. That's an increase of eight deaths and 311 cases from the day before.

Venture capital investments fell 46% from March to April: That's bad news for start-ups, but in Washington state? "In Seattle and Washington state, the picture wasn’t quite as bleak. In fact, April’s totals—$190 million invested in 21 deals—outpaced the months of January and February," reports Geekwire.

Florian Schneider, co-founder of Kraftwerk, is dead at 73. He died from "a short cancer disease," according to bandmate Ralf Hütter. Schneider—who played the synthesizer, vocoder, flute, sax, provided vocals, and more for Kraftwerk—has been nominated for the Rock Hall of Fame six times but has not been introduced.

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One of my heroes left us RIP #Kraftwerk

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Don't freak out about murder hornets: At least, not yet.

I love this story: Tokyo's Sumida Aquarium houses around 300 spotted garden eels. They're typically very shy, but the human interaction they used to receive trained them to poke their heads out of the sand, where they usually rest, and greet visitors. This head-poking is important because it allows keepers to check on the eels' health. But without visitors, the eels have grown shy and stay buried in sand. So, the aquarium decided to host three days worth of FaceTiming with millions of visitors to wake the eels up. It appears to be working. Click on the video, below.

In other animal news: Insanely constipated Florida lizard just broke the record for biggest poop

This story, originally published in Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, is remarkable:

Ph.D. candidate Natalie Claunch says her team just assumed the female lizard’s abnormally large size was because she was ready to lay eggs, but when they took her in for a CT scan it was revealed she was in fact filled with a giant poop.

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“When we went to feel for eggs," said Claunch, "it just felt like it was full of Silly Putty.”

The poor lizard absolutely smashes all known records for biggest relative crap, which was previously set by a Burmese python that dropped a deuce of 13% of its body mass.

Northwest Folklife is also going the streaming route: They'll be offering multiple streaming channels with music, "participatory dance," workshops, panel discussions, and over 600 highlighted artists.