CPAC looked fun this year.
CPAC looked fun this year. ZU_09 / Getty Images

Trump’s CPAC Speech Was Full of Lies. Ancient preschooler Donald Trump addressed the Conservative Political Action Conference this weekend, wowing the crowd of chumps with his usual delusions. The election was rigged (no it wasn’t), he fixed trade relations with China (no he didn’t), immigrants are coming to get you (no they aren’t). There was also a literal golden idol of Trump, about which the weirdest detail is that it was wearing red flip-flops like Dorothy Gale in a YMCA shower.

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There’s another Cuomo accuser. A former aide is the second person to accuse Governor Cuomo of sexual harassment. He nonpologized, saying that his actions may have been misinterpreted. (If your statement contains the phrase “to the extent that” you probably aren’t really sorry.) Democrats are calling for an investigation into Cuomo’s actions. Are men really necessary?

The Golden Globes were very nice. Chadwick Bozeman, The Crown, Schitt’s Creek, and Nomadland were among the big winners. Jodie Foster and her wife appeared to be wearing pajamas, which is a practice that should absolutely continue after quarantine.

Get used to starvation wages. It’s looking less likely by the day that Democrats will manage to nudge up the minimum wage. They’re close to abandoning a plan to penalize employers who don’t pay their workers enough to survive, and they’re pretending that a non-binding recommendation from the Senate Parliamentarian is preventing them from implementing $15/hour in the next COVID relief bill. If there's any good news, it's that Elizabeth Warren is proposing a tax on people "worth" over $50 million. But her proposal doesn't go as far as it should, which is requiring that millionaires be put in a machine that presses them with a giant boot, causing them to flatten and then stretch extra-tall while making a sound like an accordion.

Seattle Fire Department has been dealing with COVID for one year now. The department just posted a retrospective of what the last 365 days have looked like, from setting up testing sites to distributing vaccines.

Virginia is the first southern state to stop pretending there’s anything wrong with weed. A bill to decriminalize marijuana passed the legislature this weekend, and now heads to the governor’s desk. He says he supports it. The bill also allows people with past convictions to have them expunged.

It’s the first day of Women’s History Month. Intentionalist has some suggestions for women-owned businesses to support in South Seattle.

Catherine O’Hara discussed some of her iconic looks. That black and white dress! The jumpsuit that looks like she’s caught in a spiderweb! And the crown made of zip ties (!!!!) !!!!!!!

Microsoft is deleting your 3D Objects folder. For as long as I’ve used Windows, I’ve wondered what the hell that 3d Objects folder is doing there in whatever the Microsoft version of Finder is called. Apparently everyone else has wondered the same thing, because they’re removing it in a future update. Swell. But don’t stop there — keep decluttering, please.

Spirited Away is being adapted for the stage. It’s being done with Miyazaki’s blessing, and I’m cautiously optimistic. Is this going to be a Julie-Taymor-esque fantasy? How are they going to pull off some of that vomiting No-face scene? I hope they cast Momo Lu.

Max Miller is getting a cookbook. I interviewed Max about his historical cookery channel, Tasting History, a few months ago, and could not be more excited to see his work coming to print.

Put your trust in witches. Every Saturday I do a casual livestream where I wander through old newspaper archives looking for fun tidbits, and this weekend I stumbled across a huffy letter from the 1970s about the Women’s International Terrorist Conspiracy from Hell, an absolutely amazing group of people who continue to practice WITCHy activism to this day. Marvelous.

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Hitting people with your car is “bad form.” One hundred years ago today, The Seattle Star reported that during an upcoming “Safety Week” it will be against the rules for drivers to hit pedestrians with their cars. Safety Week concluded with a street party, which, the Star noted, featured "jazz," in scare quotes.

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