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People have been telling me that I should post the Human Centipede trailer here on Slog, in case there are still people in the world lucky enough not to know about Human Centipede. Well, fine. Here you go:

Human Centipede! It’s just what it sounds like! Only worse! (I haven’t heard yet if/when Human Centipede will open in Seattle.)

Lindy West was born an unremarkable female baby in Seattle, Washington. The former Stranger writer covered movies, movie stars, exclamation points, lady stuff, large frightening fish, and much, much more....

69 replies on “You Cannot Iron Out These Brain Wrinkles Once They Are Formed”

  3. I think this is a just world. Roger Ebert had to watch it and he’s unable to articulate his feelings through speech or screaming anymore.

  6. Since hearing about this movie yesterday and reading the wiki, I have been haunted by terrifying visions. I think actually seeing the movie might be better than some of the shit my head has been regurgitating into someone else’s ass.

  9. It’s showing here in LA this Friday and next Friday at midnight at the Nuart Theater. You can bet your bottom dollar I’ll be there. (bottom dollar! Get it? Get it?)

  11. I am ashamed of myself for liking this piece of shit. It is VERY creepy and not nearly as disgusting as you think it is. The acting is TERRIBLE, however.

  13. @8 – yes, I noticed that. I also looked at the wikipedia page, where it says the writer/director/whoever took great pains to make sure everything that happened in the movie was medically possible (“accurate” seems a weird word to use). I also made the mistake of reading the whole plot synopsis, and now I will never sleep.

  16. I’m sorry I saw this trailer two weeks ago.

    I am frequently impressed that you can still –in this day and age– hypnotize such a large group of people to fund, act in, direct, film, edit, and distribute such useless and unredeemable “movies” (and I used that term with great trepidation).

    It’s baffling to me. Who would think this script was such a good idea that they would say, “Yes, we should definitely make this film happen!” ??

  18. @15 “Shotgun” assumes you are still a passenger (albeit the front one)… and I’d prefer the driver’s seat in that arrangement, thanks.

  21. The good news is that a sequel is on the way:

    “I want to keep it a bit of a surprise as to what happens. I always see a lot of Hollywood horror film sequels and they’re terrible. I want to make sure the sequel is original and something cool. That’s a challenge. I have some stuff in the script that will, I hope, amaze the audience. I can tell you it’s going to be a huge centipede – with twelve people. But what happens in it is something we don’t expect.” — Tom Six

  23. I’m with #6 in that I saw the trailer and have been haunted by this. I know it’s a bad movie and it’s not real, but can anyone help me stop thinking about it? I’m serious. I’m having trouble sleeping.

  24. @21: Wonder how they get over the whole blood poisoning thing!

    Hope he does the 12th link in the chain and yanks out his tongue and nasal cavity.

  27. One of several things about this film (and the inevitable sequel, and every other horror/torture film, really) I find disturbing: for the film to “work”, women *must* be among the victims. If the story premise involved only men, it’s highly unlikely it would ever have been filmed – it’s consistently assumed that women must be among the victimized to satisfy the intended target audience.

    This is not to call out any would-be fans here; it’s entirely possible some of you would indeed be interested in an all-male film of this ilk, and that’s fine. I’m only stating my disappointment with the tired formula at work here.

    Does anyone know of any all-male horror/torture films? I’m not a fan of this genre (regardless of gender), but it would be interesting to know if I’m wildly off-base here.

  28. I guess that illustration finally answered my question – would you be basically sharing one digestive system, or would it be forcing people to eat excrement? And how, exactly, would the former be possible?

  29. @27, I’m sure the sequel will include a much more sexually and ethnically diverse cast of segments. I hear Tom Hanks has already been cast as #7, sandwiched right in between Samuel L. Jackson and Margaret Cho.

  34. I believe we must ask “Dear Science” if The Human Centipede is, in fact, “medically accurate”. I haven’t seen the movie, so I’m not sure just how stuffed into butts the #2 and #3 positions are, but isn’t there a pretty real risk of assphyxiation (hah!)? And also, just how much nutrient value is in excrement, anyway? Wouldn’t #2, and especially #3, starve to death?

  36. Well Thank You Very Much, Lindy West! When I woke up this morning I was ONE of the people in the world lucky enough not to know about this movie — But YOU have destroyed my blessed ignorance!! Damn you! Damn you to Heck’n’Gone!! (And, you know, thanks for cluing me in and stuff… Who else would if you did not?)

    @ 16 – Well, the only reason to make this movie is MONEY. It’s a gross-out contest, and, sadly, the audience for this crap (pun intended) is ready-made. Makes me a little nervous for where we’re gonna be with this stuff in another ten years (“top THAT, mofo!”).

    @ 27 – Word to that.

    @ 22 – You are a bad, baad Baconcat! 😀

  38. I was hoping that this was a spoof, not a preview for an actual movie. After reading all of the comments, my hope has been extinguished.

  39. @32: My thought precisely, SC. I’d expect an American surgeon to be more likely to conceive of something like this. Or a bitter, American med student dropout.

  41. My god, people are freaked out about this? This looks like they had a bunch of 12-year-old boys come up with this plot. “You guys, what if you attached someone’s mouth to someone else’s butt, so, like, you ate their poop when it was coming out!” Gross, yes, but not very disturbing.

  44. @38: I was hoping the same thing when I watched it, but then the noticeably dull acting clued me onto it being real.

  45. Not medically accurate at all, except by MSS (Mad Scientist Standards) and if there ever was… anything… that should have a “kids – don’t try this at home” warning, this wins! A centipede, human or not, ought to have one hundred legs, since that’s the “centi” part of the name. Accuracy demands that 50 people be shown surgically linked ass-to-mouth! Those 50 people could have been members of the Senate or Congress… Missed opportunity of the election-year!

  47. 46 comments and I’m the only one whose actually seen it??!! It’s a well done and original horror film that doesn’t remotely have kind of gore you’d expect. It’s the concept that really gets you. The most terrifying part is when he explains to them what he’s going to do using an overhead projector and what amounts to stick figures as seen in the picture at the top of the post. I enjoy movies that test me and it’s an intense little flick.

  48. I’m not disturbed, somehow. I am not interested in seeing the film in its entirety, but I enjoyed the trailer. I guess the concept appeals to my fascination with extreme sexuality. As long as it stays fiction, I am cool with it.

  52. It hurts by brain to think about it this way, but, there may be some value as social commentary to this movie. The rich are the first guy (they get everything pure), the middle class the second (debt based money is smelly money is it not?) and the rest are last (Do you have any spare change?). With such an overdetermined social structure no one is allowed to ‘graze’ the bounty of the world their own.

    Dare I say this movie is . . . timely?

    My attempt to overthink this isn’t taking away the nausea . . . Fuck!! 😉

  54. imdb.com indicates the sequel is in pre-production

    I just can’t stop laughing because that means the director has figured out a way to somehow “top” the original film. Anyone want to speculate?

  55. i’m watching it right now. see, i was asking myself what he was going to do with the human centipede after he built it…. now i know!

  60. Perhaps this quote a friend received, who had gone out and replaced their not-very-old smart phone with an iPhone, should probably not be shared:

    “You are also imprisoned as Steve Jobs’s bitch now. In his lair, all you iPhone users are surgically connected to one another by him to form a massive human centipede.”

    This quote coming from, of all people, a longtime user of Macs who refuses to get an iPhone. I suppose the sutures used are made of EULA, while there’s an App for making sure the grafts hold. It is, after all, a closed system.

  66. @27- I think it’s interesting the first segment of the centipede- the part that doesn’t have to eat shit- is male. I haven’t seen the film but I’m told the evil doctor gets some kind of sexual satisfaction when he watches the women “being fed”. This would mean that he’s getting off forcing two attractive young women to eat a man’s shit.
    Obviously all segments of the centipede are victims but this adds an element of gender violence, I think. It’s rapey.

  68. @27 Didn’t the first Saw movie only have two males in it? That is the only example I can think of.

    I saw this trailer a week ago and a nightmare about it last night, so gross.

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