Don’t Give Ur Dogs Beer, U Dummies

“ur” is my fave text slang and if I could, I’d use it on Slog but I can’t 🙁 Jasmyne Keimig

I’ve never owned a dog, but even someone as dumb about dogs as me knows you don’t give your dogs any alcohol when their bodies haven’t evolved to enjoy the drink!!!!!!!

Look at those teeth! JK

This is the cutest sticker I’ve seen in a while. The teeth! The color! I guess I think about teeth a lot when I bite into an apple—that satisfying crunch. Maybe the apple wants to bite me back.

Everyone has one of these things. JK

Saw this baby right outside of Dacha Diner, which is ridiculously delicious. I loved how big this sticker was, though I think it gets a bit overshadowed by this truly fucking basic Bible verse.

There are so many possible meanings to this one that I’m not sure someone with a big, juicy, sexy, intellectual brain like mine can really ever comprehend it. JK

What’s a “fart tit”? Honestly, I’ve been thinking about this sticker for a little bit. The best and most reasonable explanation I can come up with is that a “fart tit” is queefing during an especially slippery round of (NSFW LINK) mammary intercourse. Or maybe it’s a cool underground band. Other pertinent links I found while researching fart tits: A Boob Job Gone Wrong and a strange Tinder encounter.

As always, if any of these stickers belong to you, please email me at jkeimig@thestranger.com.