Thankfully, The Sweetest Swing doesn't have a goddamned thing to do with baseball. Instead, it's about an artist who desperately wants to stay in a mental institution because she's doing the best work of her life. Rebecca Gilman's script is impeccable, from its first artsy complaint to its final, triumphant cussword. And Heather Hawkins, onstage for the entire show, is incredible as the aforementioned scam-artist artist pretending to be baseball's baddest bad boy, Darryl Strawberry. (Seattle Public Theater, 7312 W Green Lake Drive N, 524-1300. 2 pm, $15–$24.)