“MEAT SWEATS”
A truly great argument for vegetarianism.
A truly great argument for vegetarianism. Jasmyne Keimig

A close friend of mine loved eating meat. He made wings for my roommate and I one night and after we finished he asked if he could eat the gristle off the bones. Whenever we went out to eat at a shitty but cheap sit-down restaurant, he’d eat all the meat scraps off of everyone’s plates. When we’d make a roast, he’d suck all the meat off the carcass of the chicken while the rest of us ate dessert. But during all this eating and sucking, he’d sweat profusely, nearly dripping on the table. “The ol’ meat sweats,” he’d say between bites. It’s enough to make you want to give up flesh forever!

“Shoot First”
Look out! Duck for cover!
Look out! Duck for cover! JK

Ask questions later, and make sure your partner also comes!

“Banana Licking”
Oh you know, just licking a banana with my friend!
Oh you know, just licking a banana with my friend! JK

Saw this one after getting my morning coffee at Oddfellows the other week. Look, I GET what this means, what the banana is supposed to represent, but honestly, it just makes me think of a disembodied penis which isn’t sexy, only terrifying.

“NO”
At the corner of Pine and Broadway where Ive had to tell many people, just, NO!
At the corner of Pine and Broadway where I’ve had to tell many people, just, “NO!” JK

I think I know who did this one. Where can I get this jacket? And scowl?

“Trump is Going to Fuck Us All Kill Him With Telepathy”
Marianne Williamson has spoken, people.
Marianne Williamson has spoken, people. JK

The lack of comma or punctuation in this sticker makes encountering it for the first time a little confusing, but the message is all the more urgent: we must kill the president with telepathy because he’s going to fuck us all. This a great example of a sticker that probably could have just been a tweet. But someone went through the trouble to make sure everyone in this neighborhood saw it, going back to the days of community billboards, in a sense. Except this message is on a dumpster. Fitting.

As always, if any of these stickers belong to you, please email me at jkeimig@thestranger.com.

Jas Keimig is a former staff writer at The Stranger, where they covered visual art, film, stickers, and culture.