Columns

I, Anonymous

Thank You for Singing with Me

  • comments (24)
  • Print
+ Enlarge this Image
STEVEN WEISSMAN

Dear guy who was using the urinal next to the toilet I was sitting on at the Whole Foods: We were singing along to Sam Cooke's "Chain Gang," which was playing over the store's loudspeakers. I had the bass, you were harmonizing, and we just sang. We didn't laugh or say anything else, we just got on the stage of life, or throne in my case, and we just sang. It felt like the world became a musical. And even though I didn't see you, or even look over to see your shoes, I will always treasure our brief moment together; it was special. Thank you.

—Anonymous

Submit your unsigned confession or accusation here. Please remember to change the names of the innocent and guilty. One submission will be published in the paper and online every week.
 

Comments (24) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
1
Awesome. Love it.
Posted by turtlemilk on July 17, 2013 at 9:13 AM · Report this
2
Punctuated with Pee?
Posted by portland scribe on July 17, 2013 at 11:15 AM · Report this
Looking For a Better Read 3
Sounds like a toe-tapping good time!

Maybe that's what Larry Craig should have said - "Hey, I was just jamming along with the wonderful tenor in the stall next to me as we enjoyed the dulcet tones of Musak-Barry White!"
Posted by Looking For a Better Read on July 17, 2013 at 12:32 PM · Report this
merry 4
Best. I Anon. EVAH.

Also makes me think of that one awesome 'Buffy' episode.... Life should imitate a musical much more often, IMHO...
Posted by merry on July 17, 2013 at 12:54 PM · Report this
Allyn 5
Awww... that's awesome!
Posted by Allyn on July 17, 2013 at 1:32 PM · Report this
Posted by Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In on July 17, 2013 at 1:51 PM · Report this
scary tyler moore 7
mine, too, @6! we need more people singing sam cooke songs everywhere.
Posted by scary tyler moore http://pushymcshove.blogspot.com/ on July 17, 2013 at 2:23 PM · Report this
Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In 8
7, people tend to forget that this was written by Sam Cooke as well...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nt34NJdIt…
Posted by Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In on July 17, 2013 at 3:45 PM · Report this
9
This one is worth printing out and hanging on my fridge.
Posted by treehugger on July 17, 2013 at 4:22 PM · Report this
this guy I know in Spokane 10
Joe Piscopo "Under The Boardwalk" Saturday Night Live sometime in the 80's.

If you can find the video, please please please post the link. Please?

Posted by this guy I know in Spokane on July 17, 2013 at 5:39 PM · Report this
Seattlebcc 11
Fantasic!
Posted by Seattlebcc on July 17, 2013 at 6:02 PM · Report this
freesandbags 12
Next time, Singing In The Rain.
Posted by freesandbags on July 17, 2013 at 9:31 PM · Report this
13
It was a nice moment, but am I odd for having it slightly ruined by the idea of a guy sitting on a toilet in a public place?

I am fortunate, I suppose, to have regular bowel movements that never require me to take a dump in such a place. I know women are forced to sit on those toilets but they don't do so after impatient anonymous man steps in rather than wait for a urinal and splashes his way around the toilet.

Sure, it's a phobia, as is flushing with my foot and opening the bathroom door with a paper towel in my hand.

That is all.
Posted by Cletus on July 18, 2013 at 7:38 AM · Report this
Godzilla1916 14
WoW! an I anon that we all can agree and connect on? Unheard of, can it be, what next World Peece?
Posted by Godzilla1916 on July 18, 2013 at 9:28 AM · Report this
15
Awww. Thank you Anon for cheering me up today. :)
Posted by Chandira on July 18, 2013 at 10:45 AM · Report this
16
It's the little moments like this that help me to believe that maybe the world isn't completely doomed. Absolutely wonderful.
Posted by lawdawg47 on July 18, 2013 at 12:09 PM · Report this
lolorhone 17
Awesome. This reminds me of the time I was on the Muni in San Francisco at around 2:30 am and bus driver began to sing "The Longest Time". Soon enough all fifteen people on the bus were belting the chorus and harmonizing for the verses.
Posted by lolorhone on July 18, 2013 at 6:26 PM · Report this
18
@13: Seek counseling.
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on July 19, 2013 at 10:13 AM · Report this
19
great uplifting fun story. so what's up with the headline added by David Schmader
"Music Makes the Bourgeoisie Come Together" when reposting it? Dear David, the only connection for this editorial damper of a headline to Bourgeoisie I could possibly make here is a visit at Whole Foods. I have plenty of interest in any story that's actually about Whole Foods, but this is just a fun sweet story, that didn't need you crapping on it. sincerely.

Posted by tiptoe on July 19, 2013 at 11:26 PM · Report this
lolorhone 20
@19: Dude, it's a Madonna lyric. Actually, it's a misprision of a Madonna lyric- the actual one goes: "Music/Makes the people/Come together/Music/Makes the bourgeoisie/Rebel!" So I suppose Schmader could have used "the people" with no loss of referential recognition and no class connotation. But I suspect he was just making a silly joke.
Posted by lolorhone on July 20, 2013 at 6:34 PM · Report this
21
Dude, sing in a local community choir. You can feel like that once a week!
Posted by SaraJean on July 21, 2013 at 4:30 AM · Report this
22
When I'm on the shitter in a public toilet and someone starts "singing", my first inclination is *not* to sing along, it's to wonder if it's some Vice Cop looking for blow jobs.
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on July 22, 2013 at 9:45 AM · Report this
23
@22; Seek counseling. ;)
Posted by Chandira on July 22, 2013 at 4:39 PM · Report this
24
(It's ok, I went there too)..
Posted by Chandira on July 22, 2013 at 4:41 PM · Report this

Add a comment