On Friday, March 29, police responded to a suspected shoplifting incident at a grocery store on Rainier Avenue South. The store’s manager said a woman, pretending to be shopping, had stolen $235.72 worth of goods, including “beauty care products, key chains, razor knife, candy, and 4-pack of wine,” police report. When she attempted to walk out, the manager blocked the exit with a shopping cart, and that’s when shit got real.
“IF YOU FUCK ME UP ILL CUT YOU WITH MY KNIFE,” the woman screamed. (This quote appears in all caps in a police report).
Police say the woman then began rummaging through her bag trying to find the “Helping Hand Utility Knife” that she had allegedly stolen. Frustrated by her inability to find it, she sat down and “opened a bottle of Sutter Home White Zinfadel and drank nearly the entire contents as she awaited police arrival,” police say.
Officer Jacob Leenstra, Officer Azrielle Johnson, and Officer Royster arrived at the scene. They cuffed the woman, and she “immediately feigned unconsciousness while laying across the top of the shopping cart,” and shouted, “I CANT BREATH, CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT,” said Officer Leenstra with his caps-lock still engaged.
Officer Leenstra adds (in lowercase) that “she did not appear to be under any duress,” and is well known for faking injuries to escape arrest. The police report says she was sent to Virginia Mason Hospital for her “chest and leg pains” as a precaution.
Officer Johnson followed the ambulance to the emergency room. She allegedly spit on one of the nurses, resulting in a “spit sock” being placed on her face so they could complete her examination, police say. According to hospital staff she had been “faking her medical issues” and could be released for booking.
She was arrested on suspicion of robbery and assault.