Upon seeing and reading about this:
No one would mistake the Stone Age ivory carving for a Venus de Milo. The voluptuous woman depicted is, to say the least, earthier, with huge, projecting breasts and sexually explicit genitalia…
…Nicholas J. Conard, an archaeologist at the University of Tübingen in Germany, who found the small carving in a cave last year, says it is at least 35,000 years old, “one of the oldest known examples of figurative art” in the world. It is about 5,000 years older than some other so-called Venus artifacts made by early populations of Homo sapiens in Europe.
What the image of the “Venus of Hohle Fels” immediately linked with in my mind was the memory of a passage in the middle of Wikipedia’s entry for Alexander Hamilton:
In spring 1779, Hamilton asked his friend John Laurens to find him a wife in South Carolina:
“She must be young—handsome (I lay most stress upon a good shape) Sensible (a little learning will do) —well bred… chaste and tender (I am an enthusiast in my notions of fidelity and fondness); of some good nature—a great deal of generosity (she must neither love money nor scolding, for I dislike equally a termagant and an economist)—In politics, I am indifferent what side she may be of—I think I have arguments that will safely convert her to mine—As to religion a moderate stock will satisfy me—She must believe in God and hate a saint. But as to fortune, the larger stock of that the better.”
From the beginning of consciousness, the stress has been on the shape.
This post owes its brief life to Eli Sanders.
That sculpture looks like an uncooked chicken from QFC
an uncooked chicken w/ Miss California boobs.
“Although we could go plumper”
I bet Al Hamilton’s ad would get all kinds of hits in Stranger Personals.
Those tits are soooo fake!
Gee you mean men are visual?
Wow.
I am so totally shocked that men like women with curves.
Not.
why in South Carolina specifically, Alexander Hamilton?
How do we know that the ivory carving was made by a male, and depicting the object of male desire? Were women allowed to use tools 35,000 years ago, and if so, could it not be a self portrait, or a portrait of a woman’s female cave-lover?
@ Diana,
It’s a Deli chicken with large silicon boobies attached. I hope a cave woman didn’t view herself as that! It’s like a paleolithic advertisement for Hooters’ hot wings promo.
Only HALF correct Chaz. Re-read that last sentence in the box quote you cited.
And I’m guessing it was a guy who carved this; a woman probably would have made the head much bigger.
I’m still trying to figure out the difference between regular genitalia and “sexually explicit” genitalia…
BEST Mudede-boobie post yet.
@11 – there’s no head; just a loop. It was probably used as a pendant.
It looks like Oprah.
Muh dik!
Alexander Hamilton had a lot of damn nerve saying he didn’t want an “economist” for a wife. I guess it takes one to know one.
@13,
So, that tiny little “knob” on top isn’t either a head or something to secure one on the torso, like a Barbie? My cousins were always pulling the heads off their Barbies & Skippers & rearranging them.
If Slog had a “best comment of the day” feature, this…
It’s like a paleolithic advertisement for Hooters’ hot wings promo.
…would take the prize!
I’m glad that archaeologists are no longer attributing everything to religion. Not everything is an object of worship. Sometimes cave drawing is just a bunch of kids scribbling on the walls.