Five Dolls No One Wants for Xmas. No One.

1. I like what y’all have done to the jumps.

2. I dunno, doll #4 looks like it might talk like Edward G Robinson. That’s something.

3. Aaaand now I can’t read Slog at work for the rest of the day. That first one is making me laugh whenever I scroll past it.

4. OK, I totally want that last doll.

5. BS, I want the Howdy Doody on Crack doll

6. 1– Look! It’s Joel Grey from Cabaret. I’m coming, ol’ chum!

   4– I’d say more like Sydney Greenstreet, w/ a kid-lisp. “Ah, Casthablanca won’t bwe the sthame without you, Ricky!”

7. #4 is Jaw-Tumor Jimmy!

8. And I want #3 or at least to find out if the baby actually fits inside the mama doll. (Call if professional curiosity.) Where on earth did you find that picture?

9. What the hell is #5???

10. @8, The pregnancy doll was a teaching tool from 19th c. Japan, used to teach the public about how ladies’ insides worked. Here’s an article with more photos.

    http://pinktentacle.com/2009/05/pregnant…

11. Why!?! Thanks for the nightmares that ensue until I collect all five. Jerk

12. And also, this is the best thing anyone has ever posted on the internet.

13. I literally cannot look at #1 because it freaks me out so much. I actually had to cover up my screen with my hand as I scrolled down the page to write this comment. Now I will have nightmares. Thanks, Slog.

14. The eyes. They follow me around the room. Even when I put my ‘puter to sleep…

15. #1 looks like the dummy from the Anthony Hopkins semi-horror flick Magic. Hopkins played a ventriloquist with, you guessed it, emotional transference issues.

16. I kind of want that first one – it looks like a gay Charlie McCarthy.

17. #5 “Lemme out! No air!!! Can’t. Breathe….” {beeeeeeeeeeeeeep}

18. #4 “Whattaya lookin’ at jerk?”

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