Well, that was quick. I’m done, Slog. I feel like I barely had a transition from nervous-yet-overconfident fresh news intern to jaded-yet-wise-and-still-overconfident former news intern. It’s been good and satisfying, by way of not being exactly what I expected. Rather than try to force out more platitudes, I’d like to share non-sequitur things I’m taking with me from The Stranger.
1. A profound love for grammar and formatting. It’s just a free, uncomplicated extra step to make any piece more effective. And I appreciate getting called out on errors by commenters.
2. Tolerance and generally warm feelings toward trolls. Even the most inane, bitchy, trolling comments and commenters flatter us by proving that what we write is worth responding to. And it’s the sort of incredibly cruel, honest feedback you can’t get anywhere else, which is useful, provided that you actually give a shit about what you’re writing and have opinions and stuff. It’s also fun to predict who will comment and what you all will say.
3. A tattoo. Mom and dad, it’s a bass clef on my left shoulder blade. I got it on the night of October 28 after a few drinks. Hat tip for the idea to care bear.
Bye, Slog! I had an absolutely great time here. If you’re at all curious, here’s what I’ve been up to for the past couple weeks, and will continue working on for the next few months. (Go Sex Week!)
P.S. My dad is running for mayor in 2013.
If you are serious about keeping your dad Pete from joining the by-now almost endless list of good folks hoping to squeeze McGinn out, you will have to engage in some sort of scandal at Yale that will make him seem both a bad parent and some sort of agent of the dreaded 1%. Maybe rope one of your billionaire’s-child classmates into some sort of plutocrats-conspiring-against-hipsters thing.
Thank you Paul – your hard unpaid work has been appreciated!
(Are you the squirrel rescue guy? BECAUSE THAT WAS ADORABLE!!)
Good luck! It’s nice to know you survived and are moving to great new horizons.
It was nice seeing you at the beginning at University Heights and the end at the Very Beary Christmas.
Yaletide Greetings!
Pete Holmes is your father, and running for mayor?
You rock, Paul. Thanks for all your excellent work!
P.S. My dad is running for mayor in 2013.
I wonder who your dad is. Let’s see, “Holmes”. Couldn’t be former heavy weight champion Larry Holmes, could it? Katie Holmes would make a lovely mayor, but she’s probably not your dad. Sherlock Holmes? No, he’s a fictional character.
Hmm…. wait a minute!
HOLY SHIT PETE IS RUNNING FOR MAYOR IN 2013?!! HELL FUCKING YES!!!!!!!
P.S. Dude, you better not be fucking me.
Fucking with me, that is.
@10 Mayoral races are more affected by extreme weather events and how they are dealt with, at least since the late 80’s in this town.
grammar overrated. hope you get laid as much as you want in life.
Wait, Holmes, you can’t leave; I haven’t said NEARLY enough mean things about you yet! God, I can’t remember off the top of my head what inane, hateful, dimwitted opinions are yours, even! Surely there must be some. Ah, well. Just more vitriol for the next poor sucker, I guess.
Oh, right, you’re the Yalie. Here’s one: Harvard man and a Yale man run into each other in the toilets at the white shoe law firm they both work for. The Yale man stops to wash his hands on his way out, and sniffs “at Yale they taught us to wash our hands after using the lavatory”. The Harvard man replies “at Harvard, they taught us not to piss on our hands”. (I believe that joke dates from 1883).
Take care, and remember to get your booster shots soon. There’s no telling what may be crawling on you after having spent time in that office (you didn’t use the lavatory, did you?)
I miss you already. Before you leave for good can we get another squirrel picture?
2013: Seattle Mayor
2016: Attorney General
Please pass it on to your dad. Also: go Yale. I grew up in Bridgeport/Stratford and lived just outside Yale before moving to Seattle. Harvard sucks.
Modern Pizza, Sally’s, or Pepe?
@14 Pepe’s! (But really, the white clam at sally’s..mmm!) CT is the true home of pizza! – Ridgefield
@15 you know you can get Modern at Safeco now? Down on the lower level behind center field. Of course, no clam…
@14, Harvard may suck, but Yale swallows. New Haven is for sleeping late and learning the Cole Porter songbook. If you’re working harder than that, you may just as well have gone to Harvard anyway.
Good luck and Godspeed dear. Think of us every once in a while, won’t you? And don’t look back in anger….
Very funny, Paul. I thought you’d be one of the first to know that your dad is committed to running for a second term. Now, don’t you have some website work to do?
Kimberly Mills
Communications Director
City Attorney’s Office
@16 jesus im not sure what to think of that. seems wrong. now that im in eugene though i actually get back to ct more often than seattle. enjoy.
@14, Mamoun’s Falafel, thank you very much.
@19, HA! Sorry Paul decided to make his last day here hell for you, Kimberly…
@8: The Paul Holmes/seandr sex scandal was apparently lurid enough to shut down the whole Pete Holmes mayoral campaign before it ever really began, per comment @19.
Paul Holmes, does your father share the same favorable attitude toward motor scooters that you and I do? Did he think the Vehicle Licensing Fee equally applicable to Lincoln Navigators and Yamaha Vinos was a good idea?
Thanks, Paul!
@19, @23: I’ve been fucked with, haven’t I?
Damn you, Paul Holmes! Damn you to hell!
Thanks, Paul–you’re paying your own tuition next semester, and Scooter–the squirrel, not the Buddy 125–gets your room.
XO,
-Dad
P.S. I am running for reelection as City Attorney, NOT for Mayor, in 2013.
da doox
Bon voyage, dear! Do please keep in touch/lurk. So much more enjoyable than that Freeper who preceded you.
It was nice meeting you and reading your posts, Paul! Now get to organizing Occupy Skull and Bones!
@15 – Ridgefield? Ridgefield, CT? I went to high school there and know it well.