Grant Brissey covered everything from hard news and technology, to music, film, and visual arts during his time working for The Stranger. Grant's work has also appeared at Geekwire, and in Billboard,...

28 replies on “Have You Watered Your Christmas Tree Lately?”

  1. ‘Cause mythbusters should be trusted way more then the National Institute of Standards, right?
    For fuck’s sake, I heard two morons in the elevator talking about Mythbusters yesterday:

    Moron 1: Mythbusters said that to improve traction while driving in ice, you should drive backwards. Except the gain in traction is countered by the fact that it is harder for most people to drive backwards.

    Moron 2: Well, that makes sense since the engine is in the front of the car and all.

    That’s when my brain finally leaked out my ear.

  2. Christmas Tree fires are often massive and pretty (due to the chemicals they spray on the tree).

    The tree tends to burn in different colors, and goes up in a matter of seconds. It’s almost like gasoline. And, they don’t need much to start them burning either.

    But they are warm. We used to collect the thrown out ones after Xmas.

  3. Reverse is geared with more torque than 1st gear in most cars. Not sure why you’re so bothered by mythbusters. Was your mother decapitated by a truck tire in slo-mo or something?

  4. @3 – driving backwards is the same as using 1st gear or 2nd gear instead of D for automatic. Which is one of the first things you learn when you learn how to drive in ice and snow, other than not tailgating or making sharp turns ….

    See that neat little 1 or 2 next to the D? Use that instead.

  5. @8 sorry, i gotta disagree.

    1 or 2 simply holds the transmission in that gear. The only thing you’re doing is preventing the transmission from shifting. One could argue that the increased torque (relative to the lower gears) of 1 or 2 would actually increase the chances of breaking traction when driving on snow- since an important aspect of snow driving is gentle, controlled inputs.

  6. Using hairspray as an accelerant, my ex and I did do this (outside!) last year with our tree when it was old and dry — about January 5th, I think. We were drunk. Hilarity ensued.

  7. It’s just Seattle Syndrome. Some people don’t know how to drive in snow and ice around here. They drive their 4WD Tahoe to the grocery store 3 blocks away and panic if their 6 inch heels get wet.

  8. @2 — Mythbusters tested if too many lights could cause a fire, but not other sources (electric etc). In the US, about 300 tree fires annually cause 10 deaths and 40 severe injuries.

    This clip doesn’t say how the fire was started.

  9. I’ve burned a lot of dry pine in my time, and the needles do indeed go up like magic. We’d always toss the tree onto a bonfire in the summer, it’d be good for 20 seconds of entertainment.

  10. @16 – usually the fire is not so much from the lights (which if LED don’t give off much heat) but from the outlet that was overloaded and which had dried pine resin drip into it, that then causes the fire which hungrily devours the dried pine needles and sets the drapes and other items on fire.

    Or a spark from the fireplace, but you don’t see that as much here in the city, since most people don’t use wood.

  11. @19 The more I think about that, the more insaane it becomes. How is it all of our ancestors weren’t horrifically burned up in tree fires?

  12. @16 That’s what I remember. Also, when they did the final destruction at the end of the ep I believe they had a result very much like this video. So, too many lights on a tree will not start a fire,but a tree fire will go out of control quickly and can do some serious damage.

  13. I love the NIST. When my math professor insisted we memorize the square root algorithm (because THAT’S gonna come in handy one day) but failed to actually explain it, I found it neatly elucidated on their website. Thanks for the 4.0, NIST!

  14. C’mon dudes, unlike other places where snow is far more common (Chicago, maybe, or Ellensburg even?) it is much flatter, and the snow is drier – powdery, if you will. It’s waaaay easier to drive through that than it is to try and get your car up a goddamn ice luge while it pours a massive icee down from heaven. I don’t even have a car, and yet I find myself defending the Intrepid Seattle Snow-Driver.

  15. @3 – The reason for driving backwards when you’re having trouble on ice has to do with weight. If you have front wheel drive, and you’re spinning your tires trying to get over the top of the hill, it’s because there’s no weight over the tires. If you turn around, you place the weight of the engine just a bit more over the tires, and they bite better.

    The only reason I am willing to plug this is that I’ve had it work, twice. Going up forwards had us spinning at the top, just not quite able to get make it, while going backward was no problem.

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