From the e-mailbag:

Subject: I will hit your car

Dear Seattle Drivers,

If you speed up and your car is mere inches from my knees, trust me, I will knee your car. If you try to fly through a crosswalk I’m about to step into and you then stop in front of me to look both ways, whatever’s in my hand is going to meet your car’s side door, trunk, what have you. You do not have the right of way, and if more people started walking the streets armed with pedestrian-protection devices, you might think twice before putting our lives in danger. You see a pedestrian, you stop. You can wait the extra 10 seconds. We however, may not survive your impatience.

Sincerely,
Aggravated SeaTown Pedestrian

113 replies on ““I will hit your car””

  1. I dumped a cup of coffee on a car after the driver pulled into the crosswalk while trying to turn, in front of me and a few other peds. But I wouldn’t knee a car, because my knee = softer than a metal car.

  2. Take a cue from angry cyclists and just hood or fender thump instead. Makes a hell of a noise and gets the driver’s attention. No damage to self or car.

    Or if you want to take it up a level, carry a u-lock. Headlights and sideview mirrors are plenty soft enough for those.

  3. Wow, that could have come from me, although I never knee a car as that might make me wobble and fall over. Instead, I usually use my hand to knock, tap, or hit the side or back of the car.

  4. It’s a nice sentiment and I’d second that for bicyclists, too: the crosswalk/trail is mine too so please don’t run over/into me like you can’t see me.

    With that said, what the fuck do you think you’re going to achieve by escalating the situation with either property damage, damage to yourself, or maybe an altercation with dipshit driver? Other than a childish and short-lived catharsis (perhaps with having to deal with insurance/police), I am not seeing the benefit to making the interaction more hostile than the driver has already made it.

  5. You could also say… Next time you stupid pedestrians walk without looking – I’m going to run you over. Next time you run up to the crosswalk only to walk through it – I’m going to run you over. Next time you are oblivious to the walk signal and don’t take your turn, I’m going to run you over. Next time you go in front of my car instead of behind, I’m going to run you over. Next time you ride your bike on the line separating the driving and bike lanes, I’m going to run you over.

    You’re stupid. Share the road like everyone else and stop bitching.

  6. 1) FAKE
    2) Not a Seattle person if real

    I throw cups/bottles of water all the time in NYC, sometimes people get out of the car and argue, in Seattle that would end with a gunshot, either from the drivers or the cops, so FAKE.

  7. I find that a steel water bottle full of water and swinging in whatever hand is nearest to the cars does a great job of reminding drivers that I’m there and not to run me over or splash me.

  8. 11, get a grip. Pedestrians have the right of way at a corner.

    Also, completely stop your car. Don’t keep moving your car towards me as I cross the street. It is unnerving to have someone do that.

  9. I always stop for people who want to cross in crosswalks. I even stop if they want to cross at a corner with no crosswalk. The problem I see when I do it is the car behind me will speed around me just when the person steps into the street. My stopping has almost gotten people run over. Also, the only time I didn’t see the crosswalk or the pedestrian, I was going uphill on James where there was a lot of traffic. And I got a one hundred and twenty dollar ticket. I understand people’s frustration but not property damage.

  10. I’d like to see a pedestrian-driver discourse in which the driver defends running a red light and nearly hitting a pedestrian who has the right of way in a crosswalk to race to a red light one block away. I’ve seen this happen many times in downtown Seattle so I’m sure finding such a driver wouldn’t be hard.

  11. @11 FTW. I am absolutely willing to give pedestrians the right-of-way, but if they are going to dash out between two parked cars, or barge into a crosswalk without even stopping to make sure that drivers see them first, I’m not going to feel bad about hitting them with my car. You may have the right-of-way, but in the battle between my ton-and-a-half and your buck-and-a-half, I’m going to win every time. It would behoove you to respect the laws of physics.

  12. @16 what about when you stop for a ped, they start to cross, and then are almost crushed by a car driving in the opposite direction. That’s why I never stop for people who are not waiting at a marked crosswalk.

  13. I would love to yeild all you peds the right of way, but most of the time you’re not actually attempting to cross the street, but rather gabbing on your cell phone on the corner and giving me a look like I’m some kind of freak if I actually stop for you. And then, If I do stop, you’re in danger of the cars coming the opposide direction that DON’t stop.

  14. @24, about one in five, by my reckoning, if you include people texting and not just listening or talking.

    This person wouldn’t last an hour and a half in Mexico City, I can tell you that.

  15. Hanging out on a corner, waiting a few seconds for a car to pass with a perplexed look on my face, thinking “ummm, I have the right of way, d-bag” is my normal reaction, but every once in awhile, if there are plenty of other peds to blend in with, I like to give naughty cars a light or loud spanking as they pass in front of me and say NAUGHTY! Spankings can be quiet or loud, depending on your desired effect.

  16. With the exception of Portland, people do realize this is just about the best pedestrians have it, right? Go anywhere else in the country and try the crap pedestrians try here and you will die. Also what’s up with waiting for the walk signal when there’s no cars coming in either direction? It’s safer to walk when no cars are coming, but instead most wait at the corner until it is “safe” as three cars have to slam on their brakes to stop from hitting the pedestrians who begin to walk the moment the walky-guy appears.

  17. Dear Aggravated SeaTown Pedestrian,

    Just because you’re aggravated doesn’t give you the right to do property damage to people’s cars.

    If you knee, punch, key, U-lock, or in other ways damage my car because I’ve pulled 3 inches into your sacred crosswalk, I will sue you for damages. You get to pay for a new car door. If I’m feeling aggravated in return, maybe I’ll get out and shove your pedestrian-protection device down your entitled little throat.

    You see cars, bikes, skate boarders, and strollers, you exercise a little good judgement and courtesy. That way everyone survives and nobody has an aneurysm.

    Sincerely,
    Common sense.

  18. lol sayin’ ain’t doin’ Aggravated SeaTown Pedestrian.

    I’m predicting selective enforcement. No mercy on Outback an Volvo. A studied discernment for Black Escalade. Total abstention for box Chevy on 24″ rims.

    Stay vigilant, Muscles.

  19. I visit Seattle almost every year for PAX and I can’t believe how you people always wait for a walk signal even if there’s no traffic in sight. Here, it’s a goddamn free-for all. We just wander into traffic like we don’t give a shit.

  20. I have the opposite request. Please drivers, if you can make it across the crosswalk in front of me before I make it to the front of your car, please just get through, like they might in any other city. I don’t mind. I just hate it when a car stops for me when they don’t need to, sitting there, watching me cross, pressuring me to walk faster. I feel this happens a lot in Seattle, and it slows everything down for everyone.

  21. @34 Thank you. It’s like people don’t realize how to be safe. Safe: Car goes through intersection without causing a back-up, allows pedestrian to go his/her own pace. There’s no confusion about who should go and when. Unsafe: Car stopping suddenly for a pedestrian 20 feet away, causing the car behind to stop suddenly, etc. Pedestrian now feels the need to run across the street just to be nice. Maybe tripping along the way.

  22. I saw a pedestrian get hit and killed once (and it was 100% the fault of the driver), so I am extremely cautious around cars and do not take chances, even if it is my right-of-way. Even with all my caution, I almost got hit last week, and I smacked the car as hard as I could with my umbrella. I didn’t cause any damage, but I did startle the driver, since he was on his phone and had no idea I was even there. My hope is that he will be more careful next time. It felt really good to hit his car, I have to say.

  23. @35 Unless there are pedestrian red-light cameras it’s pretty damn safe. I’m not suggesting crossing against the light in front of a cop.

  24. I love the comments from drivers who are willing to commit murder because some pedestrian did something wrong. Or because they slowed you down somewhat. Oh no, it’ll take you 10 minutes instead of 7… what is that compared to someone’s life?

  25. I drive. I’m human; Iโ€™m not perfect. I have been guilty of honestly not seeing a pedestrian and pulling forward into a cross walk so I can see if cars are coming. If people are involved in anything, honest errors will occur. And, yes, some drivers are douche bags.

    But more than once a week and nearly every day, I protect a pedestrian who walks out into the street when they didn’t bother to look both ways and do NOT have the right of way (jay walking is a stupid thing to ticket for, but that doesn’t mean peds always have the right of way). This can happen any time of day or night, and it certainly happens a lot at night with people wearing dark clothes. If I were not diligent and careful, these people would be road kill. Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

    And cyclists…jesus. Every day I see cyclists ignoring the rules of the road, relying on me to prevent an accident/injury when they are reckless, and showing disregard for pedestrians. All while achieving an unparalleled level of righteousness. Why not dump on them awhile?

    The car & drivers bashing in The Stranger and on Slog is getting real old.

  26. Are you looking both ways before entering the crosswalk? Are you walking at a lackadaisical pace? Do you wait at the corner until a car gets there and then start to go? Do you realized it’s impossible for a car to see if other cars are coming without entering the crosswalk 9 times out of 10? Can’t we all get along?

  27. Tips to Seattle pedestrians:

    -Look both ways before entering the street
    -Don’t wear head to toe black at night and expect to be seen
    -Make eye contact with the driver before passing in front of a moving vehicle

  28. @38, so true. Do it every day walking to and from cap hill/downtown. I find an ostentatious lean-forward combined with wide-eyed, gaping look does the trick for establishing eye contact….

  29. Years ago, I received a ticket for failing to stop for a pedestrian … since then, Iโ€™ve been careful to stop at crosswalks when people need to cross. I still do even after being rear-ended by a cell phone talking Hot Mamas pizza delivery guy w/o insurance. I just wonโ€™t go to Hot Mamas again … stop for pedestrians folks we live in a dark damp rainy town and waiting on the corner while folks zoom by is lame.

  30. also, protip for pedestrians straight from the Country of Estonia (and probably some other European Countries):

    “Estonia is quite dark during the winter months (roughly October through April), and Estonian law requires pedestrians to wear small reflectors, which people generally pin to their coats or handbags. Although this law is rarely enforced in cities, reflectors are very important in rural areas where it may be difficult for motorists to see pedestrians. Violators of this law may be subject to a fine of around US$50, or a higher fine up to around US$500 if the pedestrian is under the influence of alcohol. Reflectors are inexpensive and you should be able to find them at many supermarkets, kiosks, and other shops.”

  31. @49 yes!!! I love pedestrians and walk a lot myself but I can’t stop for you if I can’t fucking see you because it’s dark, raining, and you’re dressed in all black!

  32. Wow, suddenly I like pedestrians a lot less. What a bunch of egomaniacal assholes with anger management and entitlement issues (yes, pedestrians have right of way, but simple reality says some drivers will be rude, distracted, etc — you are NOT entitled to a perfect world, bitches). Apparently pedestrians are a bunch of jerks.

    And that sucks, because I am one. I walk 2 miles to work most days. Cripes, am I expected to act like these asshats? I hope not.

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