Elevated transit, dedicated bus lanes, district elections for city council—the list of things that work in other cities but could never, ever work in Seattle is long and mostly bogus. But I ran across something yesterday that works fine in Pullman but would never work in Seattle: Snap Fitness. It’s a gym that’s open 24 hours a day but only “staffed” seven hours a day. Between 10-1 and 3-7 there’s someone there selling memberships, including day passes, cleaning up, keeping an eye on things. The rest of the time members let themselves in with key cards. The gym works well in Pullman. In Seattle it would turn into a bathhouse in a week.

21 replies on “It Wouldn’t Work In Seattle”

  5. Pullman has another similar business, Anytime Fitness. It must be tough competing in a town where half of the population are students, and they get a mandatory/free membership to the awesome REC center.

  12. uh, yeah…that was pretty homosexist. They don’t have homos in Pullman?

    also, Fremont and Ballard are full of gay men and West Seattle, residential wise, IS the new Capitol Hill.

    Dan’s nervous attitude toward locker rooms would explain why he doesn’t shower/change clothes at his gym but chooses to use the stairwell at The Stranger as his private locker room…

  13. It wouldn’t turn into a bathhouse, Dan. It would be rapidly emptied of any & all valuable items that weren’t bolted to the floor. Someone would back up a truck and just start loading it up with free stuff. The only thing left would be large piles of garbage.

  15. If only that were the case! My house is right behind there! But, of course, I am now referring to it as a “cottage.” It’s classier.

  16. I belong to a local gym that has that sort of business model, but I never go there in the off hours. I guess I need to go check it out now.

  18. wow…what a cynical bunch of dumb bastards.

    why would a gym of this nature be stripped bare in a week if it was in Seattle? (and, uh, most items in a gym ARE bolted down). And, I’m guessing that this fantastic gym in Pullman, (which is apparently a magical land free of horny, slutty homosexuals and conniving gym equipment thieves), probably has security cameras which would cut down on theft in any case, just like 99% of all businesses in this country which use CCTV. And, I’ve never been in any gym is Seattle with round the clock security making sure the faggots aren’t raping the straights in the sauna or stealing everything in site. Didn’t know it was needed.

    And, the implication that people living in a rural area are good, wholesome, law-abiding folk (ie, the “Real” America to quote a certain ex-governor of Alaska) and that the monsters in urban areas are lawless, butt-fucking thieves is tired and trite. I’ve lived in Pullman sized places (much smaller actually) and there’s just as much crime/perversion/dishonesty in little America (if not more) as there is in the Big, Scary City.

  19. We have a Anytime fitness in Lakes Stevens with the same set up.
    They keep us sluts in line with video cameras and the threat of expulsion if we let other people in.

  20. In some gyms, sauna is best place to meet guys for intelligent conversation. On another note, I saw a sign in front of a tiny gym in Oaksdale, WA. near Pullman that said, “get Moooving,” rather than the promotion “get moving.” Sign featured a cow lifting a barbell.

  21. 19.

    making sure the faggots aren’t raping the straights

    Since when did fags vs. straights enter into this? I’m queer and all, but damn. It was a gay man who first brought up bathhouses, not straights.

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