From Blogging Georgetown, we get news that the Columbia City Cinema is in trouble. The State Department of Financial Institutions issued a cease-and-desist order alleging the cinema and its owner “violated state securities registration and anti-fraud laws” when it sold stock through its website(to buy new sprinklers by the end of the year, without which it risks being shut down by the Fire Department) without having first registered with the Securities administrator. The DFI told the cinema to stop selling stocks or face fines. The owner, according to a Times article, actually isn’t worried about the order—his attorney says it’s all be patched up shortly—but the cinema’s sprinklers still need to be replaced—now. If the money isn’t raised, they’ll be closing at the end of the year. Sigh… soon we will have nothing to do but sit at home and read books, just you wait.
What’s fat, red, and coming your way? It’s Santacon, the annual Santa-themed, booze-fueled Bacchanalia that snakes through Seattle well into the evening. This year, Santas will meet at the Fremont Troll on Saturday, December 18th at noon. From there, it’s unclear where they’ll go, but the Fremont Universe blog says, “likely somewhere alcohol is served.” If you want to participate, here are the rules, according to the blog:
Every Santa is referred to as Santa, in the first, second, and third person, singular and plural. Have something ready to hand out, even if it’s just candy canes. NEVER wash the suit.
Hundreds of Santas are expected to participate—join in or if you have children, head to Fremont on Saturday and blow their tiny young minds. HO HO HO!
More neighborhood news after the jump!
Wedgewood View, among a few other blogs, has a map from a Seattle Public Utilities meteorologist that shows the relative rainfalls from the Pineapple Express on different neighborhoods. West Seattle got positively soaked. Interesting stuff.
From Laurelhurssszzzzz……. sorry! BIG NEWS from the Laurelhurst blog(?!). There’s a report from website Walletpop (citing FBI data) that ranks Laurelhurst as the boringest safest neighborhood in Seattle, putting it on a par with the safest neighborhoods in Memphis and Indianapolis. Why that recommends a place is beyond me. I used to live in Laurelhurst, and, well, now I don’t. But look a little closer: Laurelhurst is actually only safer than 60% of the neighborhoods in the country. Perhaps it’s more exciting than I thought?
Laurelhurst had their electrical substation blown up by an revolutionary group named the George Jackson Brigade at midnight on New Years Eve in 1975 (Calm down. No one was hurt).
Can you name another Seattle neighborhood that has had such an exciting electrical/political event happen?
I didn’t think so….
those aren’t the santarchy rules, that’s just what some asshat posted that you copy/pasted.
the seattle santarchy facebook page
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=14…
now, copying and pasting from me (asshat) to you:
proper rules of santarchy:
The 4 F*s of Santacon:
1. Santa does not f* with kids
2. Santa does not f* with police
3. Santa does not f* with security
4. Santa does not f* with Santa
Other conventions of Santacon:
– Follow Santa
– No Santa Left Behind! Keep track of your Santa friends.
– Don’t wash the suit! Your Disgusting Santa suit is a badge of honor. Wear it proudly.
– Bars can be crowded. Its best to carry a backup plan (cough*flask!)
– Follow Santa
The Important Four F’s of SantaCon:
1. Santa does not f* with kids
2. Santa does not f* with police
3. Santa does not f* with security
4. Santa does not f* with Santa
Got it? That means no Santa-sexual harassment either, even if Santa is wearing a sexy, sexy Santa outfit and underpantas. You will not assume that Santa is interested in your advances and will be cool. Got that, Santa? Good.
Yours Happily,
Santa
@2 and @3 are right.
Drunkenness is mandatory, of course.
#1: Laurelhurst was also host to 2001’s “other” terrorist attack, when the Center for Urban Horticulture was destroyed by the ELF.
The Laurelhurst Beach Club also excluded Jews until the 1950’s, when the Anti-Defamation League filed a lawsuit and won.
Laurelhurst: “Where Terror and Anti-Semitism Come Alive!”
The crime stat thing is interesting. Even our safest neighborhood is barely above the national average. Most of Seattle then seems to come off as a combat zone of post apocalyptic proportions.
But now that I think about it, I don’t know a single person in this town who hasn’t either had their place burglarized or their car prowled.
Don’t mention Laurelhurst any more! That Beach Club has a high dive that terrified me when a posh friend brought me there once as a boy. I had to climb back down, with the lifeguard yelling at me that it was against the rules.
Rule #5: No bartender like Santarchy.
@5 the bartenders at the nitelite LOVE santa !
Good. Keep all those dumb fucks in freemont.
if anyone caught wind of the jackass trying to move santarchy to cal anderson, well don’t believe it. fremont troll at noon is still on.
the facebook page was removed to throw off the scouring media clowns.