…are fantastic if you haven’t seen them. And they beautifully capture the weird mood of the event.
- Photo by Kelly O
I met up with the 500 or so marching men, women, and children as they headed downtown on Sunday. The crowd was festive: people were laughing, smiling, waving at befuddled onlookers like any other parade—like Saturday’s Solstice Parade in Fremont, for example. And like the Solstice Parade, outfits ranged from body-painted-next-to-nothing to comfortable jeans and sweaters.
But unlike Solstice, which simply celebrates creative exhibitionism (at least the naked part), the vibe at SlutWalk was festively grim. It wasn’t so much a SlutWalk as a Rape-Survivor-Walk. Many of the women I talked to were victims of rape or assault who freely shared their stories with me and each other. Many of the men I spoke with knew women who were victims of rape or abuse. Collectively, they chanted “No means no” and waved signs that read things like, “A Dress is Not a Yes.”
When I asked marchers to tell me why they were participating in the walk, or what they most wanted to convey to men—or to their attackers—they were at a loss for words. One woman, who was holding a sign that read, “Rape is Never Justified,” told me, “I don’t know. I mean… What else can I possibly say?“
I get that. What can you possibly say if ‘no’ is not enough?
Didn’t you hear Cienna? Your boss Dan Savage says women lie about rape, especially date rape and especially if you disagree with their politics, religion or if you’re drunk. Bristol Palin apparently IS a lying slut!
i am not afraid.
Hey. HEY. Kelly O promised to slap up her photos from the Bounce party by yesterday. Don’t get me wrong – I am happy for the two posts on SlutWalk.
But I am just saying…HEEEEEEY.
I looked for you guys Cienna, but couldn’t find you in the crush. It was an amazing experience, and thank you for giving me the opportunity to tell my story.
@2: xoxo
It seems a little strange to portray some kind of prevailing defeatist attitude when Slutwalk and similar rallies exist specifically to make it clear that there is no prevailing defeatist attitude. I’ll give it to you that the event wasn’t as fluid as it could have been but the twist that SW was trying to put into the dialogue is a pretty tricky one. When the idea of a sort of excited hedonist liberation statement met the actual reality presented by survivors, people had a bit of trouble keeping track of the swings. Awesome ideas take time to round out, sometimes…especially around here. I kind of thought the whole thing went great….
Heyyy, it’s my favorite adorable red-headed vegan!
Something I don’t understand about the event is the insistence of a lot of the signs (on the website, at least) that clothes don’t talk, “I didn’t wear this for you,” etc. At some point it begins to seem disingenuous. Are we really going to pretend that we wear whatever we want whenever we want, without consideration of who we will be around, and where, or where our clothes came from (brand, store, price, etc)? Clothing talks, even if it doesn’t say the same thing to different people…
Or maybe I should say that clothing talks even if it lies.
*waving at Lissa* It was nice to get to see you there!
Sikandro, no one is saying clothes don’t attract attention or send a message. However, there’s a difference between wanting someone to look at you and admire you, and giving explicit permission for someone to touch you. Many people do not seem to see the difference. For an example, if you have a strong stomach, go read the comment threads on the “news” websites about the events. About 3/4 of the participants STILL seem to think that showing thigh or cleavage means you can’t cry rape (because after all, men have no control of their impulses, right?).
*sigh* sometimes I wonder what fucking century I’m living in.
Think a pretty woman looks hot in her short skirt? Great! Look, but don’t touch, unless invited to do so. That’s the whole message in a nutshell.
@10: Hi Geni!
@5, I don’t portray the event, or its attendees, as being defeatist. Being defeatist is accepting defeat without struggle. So… marching to protest sexual assault and the characterization of the term “slut” is the opposite of defeatist.
How I characterized it was “festively grim,” and I think that’s accurate when you’re dealing with a mass of people–many of them victims of violent crime–who have come together to protest dehumanizing characterizations of women. And rape.
Like #5 I thought the event went great as well.
I wasn’t aware that women don’t commit any rapes. Good to know I suppose. Now back to figuring out how to deal with the “men” problem.
The real event is the dialog it creates when people heard about the event and what it was.
@7 sikandro
we wear whatever we want whenever we want, without consideration of who we will be around, and where, or where our clothes came from (brand, store, price, etc)?
YES.
@ Arsenic. Exactly. That IS the real event and the issue we were trying to get to.