Last-Minute Gift Ideas at the Goodwill Outlet

The Goodwill Outlet, on 6th Avenue in SODO, is like regular Goodwill except everything but books, cassettes, and appliances are sold by the pound. Sometimes this comes at a non-monetary price. Going there on a federal holiday or a weekend is like hunting with the wolves—wolves fighting over the same wool cardigan (sheep’s clothing, you know). But recently, I purchased a Goya coffee table book worth around 50 bucks for 50 cents. In other words, it’s a great place for your last-minute holiday shopping.

For the Person Curious About Stars and Planets

This is basically everyone, because who ISN’T curious about stars and planets? Seriously. For like 50 cents, a $5.95 value, you can find out IF THERE IS LIFE ON OTHER PLANETS. This is like having your own personal Carl Sagan, but with prettier pictures. Better hop in this beauty before they switch the bins around.

See all my finds yesterday—including a personal massage tool, pre-used—after the jump.

For the Person Who Wants to Pretend They Were Really Nerdy a Kid but Wasn’t

I’m really not sure this person exists (because who wasn’t into Star Wars?), but here’s this sticker book with all the stickers pre-filled, just in case. Look, you can learn all these fun facts about Star Wars and not have to do ANY of the work.

For the Person Whose Back Just Really, Really Hurts

We all know how useful personal massagers are.

This one, while not as expensive as some of the top brands like Hitachi, features variable speeds and a cold, metal tip for optimum, freezing discomfort. On sore muscles. Because that’s the only thing personal massagers are for. Some assembly, like a plug, required. Try not to electrocute yourself.

For the Person Who’s Just Not Having Enough Fun

This “Sheer Fun” bicycle is just their ticket to sheer good times. It even comes with wheels!

For the Person Who Really Likes Trying On Shoes

Now you can bring the convenience of Payless home with only half the hygiene with this handsome, single nylon booty.

For the Person Who’s Gonna Be Retired Before 2020

Social Security system is now solidly funded, says this 1987 gem of a book, with surpluses projected beyond the year 2020. Hoo-fucking-ray, I’ll be 33.

As a bonus, you can wrap it with this heartwarming children’s tale, How Does it Feel To Be Old.

For the Girl Who Just Became a Woman

In these tough economic times, you can’t afford not to switch to cloth diapers.

For the Person Who Has Everything

Christmas socks. Like-new condition.