I will have the first four paragraphs of this story, from the BBC, tattooed on bicep:
A suspected Italian mobster who went into a clinic for liposuction surgery has ended up losing more than his excess weight.
Domenico Magnoli, a suspected cocaine trafficker, also lost his freedom.
Soon after he regained consciousness, police officers disguised as nurses and visitors bearing flowers arrested him in his hospital room.
“We performed a little operation of our own,” police spokesman Col Aldo Jacobello said.
I would only move the “said” in the last sentence so it immediately follows the quote. Other than that, it’s a crown of splendor.
Nice photo! Oh when will the persecution of my people cease???
He’ll have a long time to chew the fat… with his new cell mates.
Struggling for more one-liners here.
This is my favorite post of the day.
@2: I know! It’s the joke that cannot be improved!
“We performed a little operation of our own,” is cop genius.
“sucks” to be him! GET IT?!
Still a bullshit journalism-school word.
“We came bearing more than flowers,” Jacobello said. “We came bearing justice.”
No, still no improvement.
I didn’t go to journalism school—I learned that word from Jen Graves. Who didn’t go to journalism school, either.
Well, it’s very British. In a Daily Mail vein.
I can’t be the only one wanting to see pictures of the police disguised as nurses!
Lede is just used at this point to annoy you.