Nothing ruins the Independence Day celebration more than a bout of the delirium tremens, which is why our own Christopher Frizzelle should be pleased to learn that most state liquors will be open on the Fourth of July, from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. I know that’s not the 24-hour access liquor freedom fighters like Frizzelle are fighting for, but with a little strategic planning he should be able to make it through the holiday high and not dry.

24 replies on “Liquor Stores Open on Fourth of July”

  1. Gosh, I thought CF’s whining about liquor store hours was annoying, but now your chain-yanking on this issue has surpassed him. Still, glad to hear they’ll be open, as I was glad to hear about their new hours in your previous post.

  5. Note that as of July 1st they are open from 10AM to 9PM Mon – Thu and 10AM – 10PM on Fri and Sat and over half (well over half) are open on Sunday.

  8. Nobody really gives a shit of liquor stores are closed on the Fourth of July, Christmas, or New Year’s. That’s not the point. It’s the random collection of minor holidays, including just “Sunday”, and the random application of those closures at the various stores.

    I’ll admit it’s kind of cute to see WSLCB try to respond to some of the criticisms that have prompted the repeal efforts, but the simple fact is, they will never be able to do so adequately. This is partly because they’re a government agency, and while government is great at some stuff it is simply not able to do retail well; and it is partly because NO ONE, not even the nimblest retail giant (hello, Costco) is going to be able to operate a thousand stores on the same basis.

    You can’t get a special order into this system because all thousand stores have to have it. That’s why the WSLCB wine selection is so abysmal, for instance, and the specialty liquor: a specialty maker simply can’t supply a thousand stores, and shouldn’t be expected to. Individual stores can respond to local needs.

    This gigantism is coloring the repeal debate still. Who is driving the discussion? Frigging Costco, and the supermarket chains. They are the only ones who can even respond to the massive hulk of WSLCB. But the real solution ISN’T GIGANTIC: it’s single stores. It doesn’t solve every problem everywhere all at once. But MANY stores everywhere collectively do.

    This isn’t rocket science; it’s just plain ol’ free market. The biggest problem with WSLCB, besides the puritanical element, is their whole approach of trying to design something that isn’t the free market but works kind of like it, which a doomed enterprise. The market already knows how to do this. We don’t need a gigantic state agency OR a Costco monopoly to sell shoes.

  10. I have to say, I’m kinda on Frizzelle’s side now. I believed the “we’re open all weekend for Memorial Day!” news, and so did my friend, and multiple stores we tried *including the ones promised to be open* were not open at all. Not on Saturday, Sunday, or Monday.

    Fuck the LCB. I’m stocking up Thursday night just in case someone decides it’s time for a halfday on Friday.

  11. Jesus Christ, Christopher complains twice about (literally) random liquor store closures, and all of a sudden every mention of liquor stores gets its “Frizzelle is a raging alcoholic” jokes.

  12. Seriously, Fnarf, have you ever used the WSLCB’s inventory search engine? It’s packed with specialty items that are only stocked in a few targeted stores.

  13. @12, I use it all the time. It’s a simulacrum of reality. Your definition of “specialty” is a lot flabbier than mine. I could walk into Bulldog News right now and pull out a few drinks magazines, and compile a list of a dozen ingredients that are unavailable in this state within minutes.

    Some of those special items I can order myself — IF I WANT A CASE OF IT. That’s what I mean by gigantism. Others are simply not available in this state at all in any quantity at any price.

    My “local”, which is two miles away across one of the densest and most affluent neighborhoods in the state, was getting in some really great items a while back. Nothing crazy, but some amari and a couple of rums that you don’t normally see. That One Barrel from Traveller’s in Belize is mind-blowing. They’re all gone now, and now they have virtually nothing interesting besides the usual usual.

    What you are doing is using your own ignorance drive your opinion about what is right and proper for ME to want to buy.

    What if we turned this around to something more Stranger readers could grasp? What if there was a state agency controlling what records could be purchased, and where, and when? Would you trust the Washington State Music Control Board to supply you with the latest dance club mixes or Blue Note reissues? What if you were really into Latin music but there was no one at the WSMCB who even knew that Tumbao or Fania even existed? You’d freak out, right?

  15. Hell of a presumptive overreach @13, Fnarf.

    All I was doing was pointing out that your sweeping statements about LCB operations — in this case that specialty makers can never get their wares stocked “because all thousand stores would have to have it” — are sometimes wholly fallacious.

  16. @15, there’s no overreach. People like you, who know nothing about liquor, are hellbent on deciding what people like me, who do, should buy, and where, and when. That’s fundamentally fucked up. Pointing at the state’s search page is proof of that; you think it shows something that it does not show.

    I didn’t say that every product has to be carried in every store; I said that every product has to be ordered in the context of a thousand stores. This is fundamentally biased against specialty products. You can SEE THIS in action on the floor of every liquor store in the state. You think specialty products are easily obtainable. You are completely wrong.

  17. Fnarf,
    Would you mind changing your profile picture. I thought it was C-3PO in a bathtub typing on a computer until I clicked on your profile and saw a larger version of it. Now whenever I read your comments I have a horrible vision of you in skintight clothing in a bathtub. This makes if very difficult for me to continue to agree with you. I know that’s not rational, sorry.

  20. Oy, Fnarf.

    When did I ever say anything to suggest I am in love with WSLCB / am your oppressor?

    Mostly, I just get ticked off by fact-averse, bullying manners of argument, something to which you are increasingly prone, especially on this topic.

    You have literally no basis on which to make presumptions about what I know or think. You know nothing about me. And I know little about you, except that you clearly get your jollies being a pufferfish in this tiny pond. And that your ego may be too fragile to broach dissent.

    You’re not as dumb as Will, but you may be just as delusional. I can’t be the only one on whom your omniscient schtick has begun to grate.

  21. @20,

    Are you going to bother to prove that Fnarf is fact averse, at least in this case? You erroneously implied that it’s possible to find whatever you want through that useless search function and/or that you can special order anything you want through Washington’s liquor stores. When Fnarf proved you wrong, you switched to whining about how mean he is. It appears that you’re the one with the allergy to facts.

  22. Kesh,

    Fnarf’s spew @8 explicitly depicted a state-wide standardization (“all thousand stores have to have it” — false), leading to an economy-of-scale problem (fictitious) that disadvantages specialty items (false) and small producers (false).

    When called out on this knowing falsehood, he semantically backtracked and claimed he was referring to the special-order problem (a real problem, but clearly not what he was talking about the first time), while admitting that individual stores have, on occasion, managed to please his oh-so-discerning palate.

    I have never claimed any great affinity for WSLCB and its distribution practices, but it bothers the hell out of me that Fnarf, between bouts of snobbery, glosses over the 99.9% of private liquor stores in this country who stock nothing but shelf after paid-placement shelf of Diageo’s greatest hits. Of course specialty shops exist elsewhere. But selection far worse than WSLCB outlets is the norm.

    So he resorts to attacking me, twice, with neither cause nor evidence, as one “who know[s] nothing about liquor.” The bullying doesn’t bother nearly as much as the half-dozen logical fallacies required to arrive at that declaration.

    So, yeah, I’m over the Cult of Fnarf. Given his many remaining fans, that shouldn’t particularly irk him. I guess megalomaniac is as megalomaniac does.

  24. One Barrel Rum from Belize – an exquisite product, I agree – is currently available, thankfully – at the Kirkland store at Totem Lakes. I bought a bottle there two weeks ago. I think fnarf’s critiques are not without merit, but are also filled with misinformation. Not that this is his fault, but rather more so the Byzantine operation of the state.

    For instance, the state imposes limits on it’s managers as to how many (in dollar value) products it may special order and yet requires the same stores to carry products that may not sell in it’s area. That causes managers to minimize their special order items and sometimes require customers to order cases. The LCB has adopted large box grocery store practices in order to improve efficiency and applied it to an industry that is not large box oriented. It’s ridiculous and typical of wrong corporate thinking.

    Now, fnarf is exactly right about the solution. The current Costco initiative (which is not consumer oriented…they couldn’t give a fuck about you, the consumer; they would rather be distributors) is not going to solve the issue. I, for instance, would be prohibited from opening my fine wine and cognac shop due to the size requirements. It just won’t pencil out. The ideal bill would promote competition amongst distributors AND allow local jurisdictions to zone size and locations of stores. That allows for democracy to take place locally and for competition to properly drive the market resulting in increased selection, specialty shops, and lower prices for the consumer on the most popular items. Let the state tax it as it needs to do so.

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