Finally, the Bible and homosexuality explained. Sorry homos! Thank you and have a pleasant day.

Kelly O—formerly a Stranger staff photographer, music writer, Drunk of the Week columnist, and more!—finished art school and a soul-crushing internship at a corporate advertising agency in Detroit,...

28 replies on “Lunchtime Quickie”

  1. Ummmm. Not to make myself sound like more of an asshole than I already am, but when i lived in small redneck lumber town and that… THAT there is someone who we called a faggot and beat up….. I regret that i never met this individuals personal acquaintance, so I could have bounced his testicles of a flag pole with the help of some other well intentioned meat head.

  2. Aww yeah, he PWND that 9 year old author!!! Men are magnets? Not if I’m too dumb, we’re not! In your FACE, 9 year old kid who’s got a better chance of scoring than me!

  3. Well, I’m certainly more than willing to take Mr. “Teh Lord Has A Permanent Squeeze On My Balls, Which Is Why I Talk In A Perpetual Falsetto” Jeebus Nerd as the final word on this matter.

    Sorry ‘mo’s, but really what else can I do in the face of such irrefutable authority?

  4. Haha, at 1:40 he says “do not sleep with your relatives…uh, with your *close* relatives.” Sounds to me like he thinks cousin-fucking is OK, which is probably how this kid made it into the world in the first place.

  5. FUCK, what a pathetic Star Trek Geek, the correct “Stardate” today is 0903.16. You see, since we are not living in stardate time you take the last two digits of the year, then the month, a decimal and then the day of the month.

    Wrong on gayness and an insult to Trekkies everywhere!!

  6. i think he’s joking, and it’s pretty funny.

    @6 you, on the other hand, are not funny. you are an asshole, and apparently haven’t matured much from your younger days. are you seriously coming here and bragging about beating up “faggots”?

  7. Yes these are the experts on homosexuality. Never mind that every homosexual ever says they are innately and unchangingly gay. None of that matters. What matters is a vague condemnation in a poorly translated book and the opinion of pitiful geeks.

    I suppose any group capable of such a world wide conspiracy is due some fear.

  8. “you should not do any of these detestable things, especially sleeping with a man as you would a woman….ya homos”

    well fuck my finals, i’m going to be laughing too hard for the next three hours to do any studying at all.

  9. When the bible says not to lie with men as one lies with women, I take that to mean: don’t tell lies to men in order to get them to sleep with you (cause we all know that’s how guys get women to sleep with them). I think it just backs up my Jesus was gay idea… guys that will sleep with you WANT to know that you’re only looking for a little action right then and plan on dropping them IMMEDIATELY after. Maybe I’m just too sick and high to figure out what the hell I’m thinking though.

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