On the afternoon of Wednesday, September 14, officers responding to a call about a burglary in Normandy Park cleverly resorted to some Kraft™-y detective work to try and identify their suspect.
It all began when a resident of Marine View Drive SW returned home at 3:30 in the afternoon to find a shattered patio door and a rifled-through bureau and medicine cabinet. According to the police report, “Several rooms had been ransacked including master bedroom closet, upstairs office, and downstairs office.” The resident reported that multiple cabinets and drawers were left open throughout the house, including, bizarrely, “the refrigerator door and cheese/meat drawer.” That’s when the police work got Kraft™-y.
In the fridge, one of the officers noticed a loaf of cheese that “appeared to be eaten off of.” So the quick-thinking officer “recovered… the cheese for possible DNA/fingerprint evidence.” Alas, the officer dusted for prints at the scene of the crime but concluded that the suspect was wearing gloves due to the “mottled appearance of prints.”
Back at the precinct, the officer “swabbed the cheese for possible saliva” and submitted the swab for DNA analysis. The suspect might have gotten a-whey with the crime for now, but who knows what DNA analysis will reveal?
Thats some real gouda police work right there.
That’ll teach the thief to think caerphilly before committing another crime.
Hey, if they can’t find evidence, they’re out of luck. To convict, they have to rely on what they can provolone.
Are we ever gonna be able to “like” one another’s comments? Bravo, #2.
no. just no.
Cheese.
Gloves.
SPD released this composite photo of the suspect:
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xNKtiKiZFjA/Te…
Taken right out of “Red Dragon”.
2@5 — Cheese? Gloves? I suspect this character.
Is there anything that Velveeta can’t do?
Here’s to the police capturing this muenster before he strikes again.
Havarti heard about this…was anyone there rennet happened?