Woman, talking to man: “See, that’s the good thing about being married—you two can share a one-bedroom apartment.”

If that’s “the good thing” about marriage, our bank accounts are collectively busted.

Brend an Kiley has worked as a child actor in New Orleans, as a member of the junior press corps at the 1988 Republican National Convention, and, for one happy April, as a bootlegger’s assistant in Nicaragua....