Here’s what I know. I had 20 pumpkin pie filled cream cheese cupcakes on my desk. They were topped with cinnamon cream cheese buttercream and little cinnamon-sugar pie pieces. The pan of cupcakes was wrapped in wax paper and plastic wrap, and there was a note on the top saying “NO! FOR SLOG HAPPY!” That is because I did not want the greedy Stranger staff to eat your cupcakes, Sloggers. They’re YOURS. They’re for YOU. I was going to bring them to Slog Happy tonight (at the Summit Public House, 6 pm, by the way).
BUT!
After sorting some e-mail, I went to get coffee and a banana. When I returned, the cupcakes were GONE. Grant can’t stop giggling. Christopher held back laughs, too. Brenn claims to have “not noticed” anything. Brian, the boss of all our computers, is acting very guilty. This banana is delicious.
SOMEONE STOLE YOUR CUPCAKES!
I’m engorged with anger! As recompense, how about you post the recipe Megan?
I’m pissed.
Brissey will pay!!!!!! I don’t know who stole the cupcakes, but Brissey will pay!!!!!!!!
Call the SPD. They’ll kick their way through the staff until the cupcakes turn up.
Good thing I was going to kill the tunnel instead.
My guess is the TSA agents took them.
Well I’m not going to come now, even though it’s on the same block I live on.
I don’t know, you couldn’t pay me to eat that thing. Consider yourself lucky.
By the way, Megan, are you saving these insane recipes anywhere?
A couple of weeks ago, while loading the dishwasher, I accidentally got a fork tine jammed under my fingernail. It went about a third of the way down the nail bed and hurt worse than any broken bone I’ve ever had.
You may think this story has nothing to do with your situation. But, I’ll bet there are forks in your office somewhere. And I’ll bet with said forks you could extract the location of said cupcakes from those fools in less than 5 seconds.
Now see, if you hadn’t cleaned off your desk they would have had a better chance of survival.
Of course they probably would have been contaminated and unedible though.
See, I told you you shouldn’t have cleaned off your desk.
Now, go put the bris back in Brissey and hack his penis off with scissors.
Oh right Julie @10, also look in the trash cans for the wrappers! Most people are too lazy to get up and walk to another trash can to hide the evidence.
Yahtzee!
OK…thievery aside…
That is one freakin’ beautiful cupcake.
@10, @12, that’s two flinches in five seconds. Thanks so much.
I would commit unspeakable crimes against humanity in order to be able to eat something that contains a miniature pumpkin pie. Y’know, in case you need help implementing Julie’s suggestion.
I just had a thought.
Isn’t the SPD supposed to treat crimes like this as more important than MJ?
Why not phone up their drug task force and get them to work doing something useful?
I live on the same block too Joh (hey neighbor!), but yeah, this latest development might just change my evening plans.
Worry not, Joh and Jen! I WILL FIND YOUR CUPCAKES! I have seen no wrappers. They’ve yet to be eaten. There is still time. There WILL be cupcakes. Oh yes. THERE WILL BE CUPCAKES.
@Joh @Jen Me too!
Someone allegedly stole your alleged cupcakes, allegedly made of pumpkins? Hmmmm?
I tore the back left pocket on my pants and had to fix it with a safety pin.
They should make a TV show about all the crazy antics of the Stranger’s offices. It would be such a good TV show and everyone would watch it and say “Wow, I never knew comedy could be so comedic. That’s my kind of entertainment!”
@23 they did. Don’t you watch Jersey Shore?
I am very upset. Very.
Especially now knowing they were pumpkin cream cheese filled.
Oh, so upset. >:-(
Fine. I’ll be there at 8:30. Save me on, Seling, or I steal your fiancee again.
holy shit, megan. have your midlife crisis NOW so that you will feel the need to change careers and become a pastry chef. in my town. or in my kitchen – that would be even better. those look fucking amazing.
also: how does one make a cheese cake cupcake? do tell.
@28 I hear a request for SLOG recipes coming on …
Get me a pack of smokes, a tray of ice cubes and a John Tesh video, and line up the suspects. I’ll have a confession within ten minutes.
I’ve been ripped off like that at work. Shit I’ve brought in for something else disappearing (even though I very often brought shit in for everybody at work). I once bought about six boxes of Girl Scout cookies for someone else that disappeared from my cupboard at work. People thought it would be cool to help themselves.
I don’t know how I got the message that to do such things was very uncool and so many others didn’t, but it is indeed very uncool in my opinion. Rather like stealing from the March of Dimes jar.
And you know what happened after all this happened? I never brought anything else again for anybody….ever.
Naughty, naughty children.
@23 @24
I thought it was called “Intervention”
If there are no cupcakes. There will be blood. I saved almost 700 calories out of the 1300 I am allowed a day just for one of these freaking cupcakes. My blood sugar is dangerously low, and by “dangerously” I mean dangerous to those who conspire to deny me these cupcakes. Return the cupcakes, foul hipsters, or RUE THE DAY.
OMG. I’ll totally confess to whatever you need confessed to if you’ll share the recipe.
And I’ll gladly denounce Paula Deen and enthrone you as Culinary Goddess if you share that recipe.
5280, what the hell is the matter with you? YOU’RE PROBABLY A KALE EATER!