This makes me happier than the news that the SF Giants are joining the “It Gets Better” Project: the president of the officially-designated hate group Concerned Women for America was watching American Idol when Google Chrome/It Gets Better ad aired. Penny Nance scolded Fox on her blog:

Thank you for cleaning up the Viagra commercials Fox, but PLEASE what’s with the new tolerance for homosexuals campaign disguised as anti-bullying? Bullying is wrong. It is wrong for any reason. Apparently, American Idol with the help of Woody from Disney’s Toy Story, thinks that my 4th grader needs to be fully aware of the plight of teens who view themselves as “gay.” I am sorry, but he doesn’t even know about heterosexual sex yet. Can you give me some room here? I am ticked because I feel tricked. Fox blew it last night. The point is parents felt secure in allowing our entire families watch this show. They lured us into a false sense of security and broke trust with us last night.

A few thoughts…

First: A fourth grader who “doesn’t know” about heterosexual sex? Is she raising that kid in a skinner box in her basement and only letting him out to watch American Idol?

Second: The Google Chrome/”It Gets Better” ad doesn’t promote or discuss or campaign for homosexual sex. It acknowledges the existence of LGBT people and LGBT kids and gives those LGBT kids hope for their futures. Acknowledging the existence of LGBT people does not raise awareness of the specifics of gay sex anymore than acknowledging the existence of heterosexuals raises awareness of the specifics of heterosexual sex. This is a popular argument among haters like Nance: Talking about gay people = talking about buttfucking! But talking about straight people ≠ talking about twatfucking. Because straight relationships are not defined by sex. Straight relationships are about love and commitment and family and big fancy weddings and Jesus! But gay people? We’re not about any of those things. We’re about buttfucking.

Third: Mission accomplished.

The primary goal of the IGB campaign was to reach LGBT kids who are being bullied by their peers and their families. LGBT kids are four times likelier to attempt suicide—unless their parents are hostile. LGBT kids whose parents are hostile are eight times likelier to attempt suicide. The bullying and hostility and rejection too many LGBT kids are subjected to by their own families is by far the most destructive kind of bullying. And those kids—kids with parents like Nance—are the ones who most need to find their way to www.itgetsbetter.org.

Now I don’t know if Nance’s son is gay, bi, or trans, but if he is, he needs to know more than most that it can get better for him too, that there’s hope for his future, and that the adult world isn’t entirely populated by hateful shits like his mother. He needs to know that there are a lot of people out there rooting for him: lesbian dairy farmers, trans porn stars, gay doctors, Woody—even the president of the United States.

And if Nance’s son finds his way to www.itgetsbetter.org—maybe not now, maybe in a year or two (I knew for sure that I was gay by the time I was in the seventh grade)—”It Gets Better” videos won’t just give him hope for his own future. They’ll also give him hope his family’s future too. There are a ton of videos at www.itgetsbetter.org created by LGBT adults whose families were hostile when they first came out but whose families now love and accept them. So if Nance’s son is gay—and here’s hoping—and finds his way to the “It Gets Better” website, he’ll hear from moms and dads who used to feel the same way his mother does now but who grew and changed. He’ll meet moms and dads who now reject anti-gay bigotry, not their gay children.

Nance’s son was always our target demo. Again, we don’t know if he’s gay. But he might be and, if he is, he needs to hear from us. And the Google Chrome/”It Gets Better” campaign has helped us reach him and millions more like him.

And one day, Penny, if it turns out that your son is gay, and if the “It Gets Better” Project helps him survive his last years under your roof, you’ll thank us—the tens of thousands of people who’ve made videos for the “It Gets Better” Project, Google, Woody, everyone—for helping to save your son’s life.

81 replies on “Son of Prominent Right-Wing Bigot Finds Out About “It Gets Better” Project”

  1. Ooookay will whoever knows some code around Slog add a feature to: 1) filter out all IGB posts and 2) filter out all Dan Savage posts.

    This is getting ridiculous.

  3. @1: Why don’t you use an RSS reader that lets you only open the articles you’re interested in. I, personally, loved this post and am glad to have read it.

  4. If her son turns out to be gay, she’ll probably blame it on the traumatizing experience of seeing the IGB commercial when he was 9.

  5. Someone over on Joe’s blog made a comment that said something like: “Anyone who thinks being gay is only about sex also thinks our hearts don’t break”.

  7. I thought gay people were the only people having sex these days. Married people just fight and and do funnyu things in harmless romantic comedies.

  9. But Swearengen you can do that all by yourself! You know. Just don’t read them. See how easy?

    On topic:
    Most recently I saw the ad during the season finale of Survivor. Woot! Way to reach millions of people!
    And p.s. Every time I see it? I cry.

  11. Well, Dan, this is the kind of person that raises bullies. So if the child is also LGBT his classmates are probably in for a cruel bit of treatment until he gets old enough to wake up or finds someone to lift his luggage.

  13. @9 That’s the first time I saw it on tv. Of course I’ve seen it online dozens of times, but we don’t usually watch the commercials. My partner was fast forwarding and I made her stop and rewind so we could watch it.

  14. It’s also important to point out, I think, that the IGB campaign can help this twat’s son even if he’s straiggt. Yes, gay kids often have a more difficult time of it, and yes, the primary goal is to help them out. But gay kids are bullied too. And no matter this kid’s current or future sexuality, I’m willing to bet that with a mother like that he’s already experiencing bullying at home, if not in school.

    So, anonymous kid: it will get better, if you let it. You don’t have to grow up to be filled with hate like your parents. And no matter your sexuality, life improves after high school. That’s pretty much a given.

  16. I agree with all of it except for the part where you hope Nancy’s son is gay. I don’t. Not that I don’t appreciate the tremendous irony that would be involved, but I wouldn’t wish that kind of a parent on a gay child. Can you imagine how damaging it would be for you to not only have a parent who disapproves of who you are, but whose entire life is dedicated to the denigration and destruction of people like you?
    I don’t think having Nancy for a parent is healthy for any child and I’m glad her son could see the ad, but I also hope he’s straight and can hopefully escape his family mindset with his psyche intact.

  17. Ooookay will whoever knows some code around Slog add a feature to filter out all Swearengen posts?

    This is getting ridiculous.

  18. I saw that commercial last night, too. Was doing fine until the closeup on the comment about how your video saved the person’s life. That stupid swelling music just designed to strangle the heartstrings…

    Now I’m out of tissues.

  19. Why does she even think kids know what the sex itself IS? I’ve seen plenty of bullying where “fag”, “sissy” and “queer” were thrown around about kids who knew only that the words were hurtful, not that they involved buttsecks or whatever. They even get thrown at kids who *aren’t* LGBT This line of argument carries no weight whatsoever.

  20. @16 – Dan never says he hopes Nance’s son is gay. He just says that IGB will give him the HOPE he needs IF he is. Please read the blog post before commenting.

    PS American Idol features gay and closeted gay people all the time.

  21. This is indeed a reason to smile! What more could a parent want, but have their children grow up to be compassionate adults who live with integrity. That’s my hope, anyway.

    Ps. The thing you’re looking to preserve is innocence, Nance. Ignorance is the wrong “I” word. Critical thinking preserves innocence, it’s what gives your child the freedom to say no to peer pressure and adults who haven’t had their credentials examined (or criminal background checks). Parents want their children to listen to their guts, don’t they?

  23. Nice takedown, Dan. When I was in fourth grade, I had no clue what homosexuality was. But I sure knew that “faggot” was a terrible insult.

    @1, if you really hate Dan Savage so much, why the hell are you here? Case in point: I really Hate Matt Drudge. Consequently, I never read his blog. Problem solved.

  25. @20 I did indeed read the post:

    . So if Nance’s son is gay—and here’s hoping—and finds his way to the “It Gets Better” website,..

    Please note the two “ands”. As written Dan is hoping Nance’s son is gay and then continuing on with the possibility that he find his way to the It Gets Better website. So I disagree that I’m the one that needs to carefully read the post.

    I will admit that I decided that it was “Nancy’s” son and not “Nance’s” son for no apparent reason though.

  27. Lynx, I agree with you. I don’t hope anyone’s son or daughter turns out to be gay. I hope they turn out to be exactly who they are supposed to be. In this case, I hope Nance’s son turns out to be free from the encumberance of his mother’s bigotry, whatever his sexuality.

  28. @22, is there anything like that for Chrome? That’s what I’ve been using lately, and I would love to not see those trolls.

  29. When you get right down to it, It’s the same argument that those idiot women in that tacky subdivision in Texas have wtih the David statue in their neighbor’s front yard. Just because they have confusion between sex versus emotion versus biology versus age-appropriate discussions, and are looking for their 15 minutes of public outrage, why should that be the greater society’s problem?

  31. Actually, one could perhaps make a case that the most disturbing sex-oriented programming to watch is coverage of the Senior PGA Tour. Between all the new fathers and the commercials (Mr Dole’s most lasting contribution to society), anyone inclined to squick might well think Viagra to be the main staple in the over-50 diet.

  32. @27 just to be absolutely clear, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with Nance’s kid one way or the other. It’s Nance that has the fucking problem. I am however saying that even as I wouldn’t wish a mother like that on any child, I would wish her even less on a gay child. Hoping that her son is gay, because you understandably dislike her and wish her discomfort, is also to hope that the genetic-hormonal cards her son was given turned out to be those that were to cause him the most suffering. Whatever he is, he is and I wish him a full bigotry-free life, but I feel very sorry for the gay children of anti-gay bigots.

  33. Yes, she probably is raising her child in the equivalent of a cultural Skinner Box (reality-denying people have to come from somewhere). I, too, have never understood why discussing the existence/treatment of gay people should necessitate discussing the mechanics of gay sex any more than discussing the existence/treatment of straight people necessitates discussing the mechanics of straight sex. (I think this is probably because it obviously doesn’t, it’s just an ill-conceived but surprisingly persistent rhetorical device designed to promote/rationalize homophobia.) I find it telling that so many more ‘Conservatives” than ‘Liberals’ feel the need to ‘protect’ children from information: if knowing more about a topic (sexuality, reproductive health and safety, religion, etc.) is likely to cause someone to question your position, it might be time to re-evaluate your position and examine why, exactly, that information isn’t also causing you to question the position. Facts do indeed have a known Liberal bias [thanks due to The Rev. Sir Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, D.F.A.] (which is why legitimate news organizations do actually have a Liberal bias e.g. a bias for demonstrable and sourced factual information), necessitating the discursive construction of an alternate reality with alternate facts in order to validate the Neo-Con project.

    It’s great to know that the Google ad campaign is having the exact intended effect (in the eyes of IGBP; I’m not sure how effective it is at selling Chrome or the Google platform, though Google is enough of an outlier in corporate behavior that it may actually be the case that their primary goal is to publicize IGBP and the Google ad content is just there to justify the campaign as a legitimate endeavor in the interests of stockholders’ bottom lines).

    @1: The author is listed right there under the title; just skip Dan’s posts. I assume you can read, else surfing Slog wouldn’t make much sense. It’s not like someone’s sitting with you at the computer, forcing you to read the entirety of every post to Slog, is it? If it is, make some sort of trollish comment in response and use the substitution code A=B, B=C, C=D, … Z=A and 0=1, 1=2, 2=3, … 9=0 to give us your location so we can send help!

  34. This woman won’t thank you for making her child happier. Hate is among her family values, happiness is less important than conformity.

  35. First of all, there was an episode of American Idol a few years back where a guy sang “Let’s Get it On” and dedicated it to his mother. That’s way grosser than butt sex.

    Secondly…. LESBIANS ARE GAY TOO and most of us don’t have butt sex. Buttfuck all you want, I don’t care, but I’m so sick of gay = butt sex when half the gay population doesn’t engage in it. Yes, I know there’s a negligible amount of lesbians who do but they are probably cancelled out by the gay men who don’t engage in it.

  36. I totally squealed when I saw the add during Saturday Night Live. My teenage life would have been so much better if I only knew that there were lots of other gay people out there, doing great things and living fabulous lives.

  37. @28, I believe the support for Chrome is not the best (I had to switch back to FF for SLOG because of this lack) I believe Chrome does things differently so he can’t make a filter for it.

    @30, thank you. I fully accept kisses as currency.

  38. @36, this is exactly why the bigots hate IGB and it is why I celebrate it. It undermines and subverts the authority of parents to teach kids that homosexuality is wrong. That authority should be undermined at every turn. IGB can reach kids and parents are powerless to stop it. If IGB helps to change some parents that is all well and good, but what is more important is that if a gay or lesbian child has hostile parents the kids can get validation that it is okay to be gay.

  40. @ 22 Thanks, but I was just being sarcastic. I don’t always read the trolls’ posts, but I sometimes do for entertainment purposes. Will in Seattle is mostly inoffensive, but the period troll, pugilist puck and Mike Leung can be unintentionally hilarious at times. It’s true that by now I’m bored with SB’s constant contradictions and avoiding of the questions his posts raise, but then I do what they all should do when they don’t like a person’s POV: I don’t read it.

  41. “Talking about gay people = talking about buttfucking”

    Thank you, thank you. Most of the kids most at risk (and most of the kids who are bullying them) have never had any kind of sex at all yet.

  42. @40, the joy of this filter is you can set them to default be hidden (just like the majority of worthless anon commenters) and then view them if you choose. Being able to read any post about the tunnel or marijuana and not automatically be forced to see Will in Seattles continued ignorance is a blessing.

  43. Once you decide that a certain type of behaviour will land your child in a lake of fire forever, simple parental love requires that you be in favour of anything that might reduce the chance of that behaviour—bullying, ‘reparative’ therapy, unelective surgery….

    Of course this is monstrous, and of course it makes no sense at all for a Calvinist, as most AFA types are, but it’s an example of the power of really the worst idea in human theology. Eternal Damnation as an avoidable possibility practically demands that good people do horrible things if they think that The Worst Thing would be any less likely thereby.

  44. @ 42 If I cared about those issues, I’d probably agree with you, but I don’t live in the US.

    And besides, I wouldn’t actually make an effort (like changing a setting) to read the trolls, know what I mean?

  45. Boo to the bigoted hate monger who heads up the concerned women for america. Dan didn’t “wish” or hope that Penny’s son is gay. No parent ought do that, and dan didn’t and doesn’t. It’s not rational to hope that one’s child is gay in an antigay country. Being gay isn’t preferred given the existence and prominence of people like Nance. But, if your kid turns out to be gay, it’s just another obstacle to deal with, and the IGP aspires to do that.

  46. Oh Retardo, please don’t mention me. You’re inferior in just about every sense of the word, and your tedious rambling posts are best ignored. The world doesn’t need inarticulate, uneducated, limited and elderly useless faggots like you. You are a living contradiction to the message of the IGB project.

  49. Well, for one, fellatio isn’t political activism, Retardo. Even a perfunctory run through of your posts would indicate that your identity and sex acts are very closely related. Further, one would be left with the impression that you don’t know how to reason, as an argument almost never makes an appearance in any of your leavings. Or, rather, attempts but never a valid one, which would be the lowest threshold. You never go beyond opinion…as I said, limited.

Comments are closed.