Dina Martinas voice sounds like a cat having an epileptic fit on a chalkboard.
Dina Martina’s voice sounds like a cat having an epileptic fit on a chalkboard. DAVID BELISLE

<a href=”http://www.thestranger.com/events/21853723/april-sance
http://www.thestranger.com/events/21853723/april-sance
http://www.thestranger.com/events/21853723/april-sance”>APRIL Séance

BOOKS Wed March 25, Sorrento Hotel (900 Madison St)

Séance you say? Inside of the lavish and most-likely-haunted Sorrento Hotel? Sounds like an event I wouldn’t not want to be stoned for. Rebecca Brown, Joshua Beckman, and Jan Wallace are your hosts, aiming to summon the spirit of Alice B. Toklas (aka Gertrude Stein’s girlfriend) with readings, music, and (regular) brownies.

Nearby snack: Fuck it. Enjoy the Dirty Dancing McDonald’s (1122 Madison St)—have you SEEN that fierce font?—while you can! It is slated to become a c-word in a few years, and those two-for-a-buck apple pies aren’t going to dip themselves in a McFlurry.