- JAMES YAMASAKI
Yeah, sure, we know. It’s summer. It’s sunny. You’ve got better things to do than waste five minutes and a postage stamp voting in some stupid, pointless primary. In this election, the top two candidates from each race will continue to the November ballot, and in most races, we already know who they will be.
But you know what happens when you don’t vote? Mayor Mike Fucking McGinn!
Four years ago, some car-hating, pot-smoking cocksuckers at a foulmouthed alt-weekly thought it would be funny to endorse a fat bike-riding sociopath for Seattle mayor, and because you didn’t vote, he won! The result: the postapocalyptic nightmare we now all live in—something along the lines of Mad Max, but with fewer cars.
It doesn’t have to be this way. Together, we can toss out these idiot politicians those idiot voters put into office. Just fill out your ballot—exactly as we advise after the jump—and Seattle will enjoy a brighter, slightly less dystopian tomorrow.
